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The Daily Vulnerable by Chude Jideonwo: Perfect
People like perfect stories, Friend. Be careful.
“I haven’t had any alcohol in 5 years,” for instance.
But are you sure?
Are you sure they haven’t had just a sip at some party for their dear friend, just as a toast? It didn’t make them drunk though, it was really only a sip, and they haven’t had a drop ever since.
Still, to admit that ruins the perfect picture; the spotless story.
I stopped watching porn more than half a decade ago. I hated what it was doing to me. I hated how I felt after. I hated how it distorted my reality. And I didn’t like that this thing, which made me feel so dirty, had any control over my life.
After praying, and reflecting, and planning for years before (so it was a process), I just woke up one morning and stopped.
But.
Every now and then I catch a glimpse of it for a few seconds – in a spam email dropped into my main inbox. I don’t stay with it; still, I see it.
But which story is better?
“I have not watched a glimpse of porn for over 5 years, except for two years ago when I found a random link on my PC and clicked it for the heck of it, or caught it in my friend’s house and just smiled as they watched and blah blah bla.”
OR
“I have not watched a frame of porn in over 5 years’.
One: perfect. The other: imperfect.
Which one will you choose to tell?
The lessons are the same. The victories are the same.
But the first one admits a humanity that allows others to find peace with their own less-than-perfect stories too.
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