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Peter Molokwu: Outgrowing Friendships is a Part of Life… Embrace It!

The friends that are temporary in your life are just as important as your ‘permanent’ friends. They teach you to value those who will stay so much more. And every happy memory, whether or not you lose the person you shared it with, is as valuable as diamonds are.

Molokwu Peter

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In the last 3 months, I’ve lost a couple of friends. When I say ‘lost’, I don’t mean death, I mean not being able to be in contact with them or talk to them like we normally would. I have been trying to understand and accept the fact that life happens.

I am an Ambivert, which technically means I’m in-between being a socially confident person and very quiet and for some funny reasons, the thought of making new friends scares the hell out of me. I mean, who even has time to meet new friends or even catch up with old ones in this Lagos when it’s either you are going to work early to beat traffic or you’re stuck in third mainland traffic.

I’ve had my own share of good friendship gone bad and bitter and I honestly don’t want to use this post to apportion blames on any party. Shit happens.

I was speaking to a friend some time ago and she said something that got me thinking. She said: “There’s nothing like ‘losing friends’, rather, it’s more like changing your circle and people you associate with. As you grow, you’ll notice that your mindset changes and how you see the world, and social interactions, changes.”

I’ve come to the full acceptance that losing friends does not make me a bad friend, neither does it mean it was any of our faults. The friendship died a slow death. But one thing I am aware of is growth – I still love and cherish you but life happens. Some friends come into your life only for a short period of time.

Each of these friends has served a purpose in your life, just like you did in theirs. You gain and learn from each other as much as you can. But sooner or later, priorities might shift and with more experience in life, you realize what you want from friends – and these friends don’t offer it.

The important part of losing friends is acceptance. You should know that it is normal to lose friendships. Learn your lessons, maybe help each other become different people and move on. You don’t need to stay cordial with everyone you ever met in your life.

Losing a friend can be just as hurtful as breaking up with a partner or even more so. On the brighter side, think of it as a lesson. As the poet, Nikita Gill says, “from these lessons you learn how to choose the people you love better”.

The friends that are temporary in your life are just as important as your ‘permanent’ friends. They teach you to value those who will stay so much more. And every happy memory, whether or not you lose the person you shared it with, is as valuable as diamonds are.

Molokwu Peter is a Lifestyle blogger and a Visual content creator. He is a passionate volunteer at Lagos Food Bank Initiative which is aimed at fighting malnutrition and hunger in Lagos state. He has a degree in Mass Communication as well as certifications in Digital Marketing, SEO and Social Media Marketing . Apart from writing, volunteering and chopping life,he enjoys photography and editing pictures. For conversations he can be reached with the email [email protected]

15 Comments

  1. Billionaire in grace

    March 25, 2020 at 7:36 pm

    Well written

    1
    • Tim

      March 26, 2020 at 9:32 am

      Well said

    • Chinyere Nancy Okpala

      March 27, 2020 at 1:16 pm

      Great write up bro. Keep it up

  2. Kenechukwu m

    March 26, 2020 at 9:25 am

    An exceptional article brother

  3. Molokwu Peter

    Peter Molokwu

    March 26, 2020 at 9:46 am

    Thank you

    1
  4. Molokwu Peter

    Peter Molokwu

    March 26, 2020 at 9:47 am

    Thank you for taking out time to read.

    1
  5. Chinenye

    March 26, 2020 at 10:59 am

    So cool

  6. Chidera

    March 26, 2020 at 11:00 am

    Love it ?

  7. karen

    March 26, 2020 at 11:49 am

    You opened my mind

    • Chinenye

      March 27, 2020 at 5:09 pm

      Yassssss! Just came to mark register. That’s my cousin. Whoop!!!!

    • Chinenye

      March 27, 2020 at 5:09 pm

      Yassssss! Just came to mark register. That’s my cousin. Whoop!!!!

  8. Biodun

    March 26, 2020 at 12:53 pm

    Great piece !

  9. Chinenye

    March 27, 2020 at 5:11 pm

    Yassssssss! Just came to mark register. That’s my cousin!!! Whoop whoop!

  10. Tessy Ejovwo Orumo

    March 29, 2020 at 6:13 pm

    Well written I’m impressed

  11. James

    April 16, 2020 at 12:30 pm

    Keep it up bro

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