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7 Things Married People Won’t Tell You about Marriage

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In this part of the world, we are more idealists than realists. If we face setbacks in business, we are comfortable with reciting the famous words, “it is well’. If rain soaks you on the way to the office, it’s ‘showers of blessings’ and a promotion is probably on the way. If our right palm itches, it means some long lost relative will send cash soon.

It is no wonder that for many ladies, marriage seems to be the escape from society’s pressures. Many of us fantasize, dream or even start planning a wedding before meeting ‘the one’. Worse still, the romantic movies of heroes falling in love with less than perfect women and sweeping them off their feet in a proposal at the airport, add kerosene to our flame of fantasy. The truth is: idealism is great; but the idealist never knows what to do when the real situation hits hard like a deadly punch from a wrestler’s fist.

Without sounding like a messenger of doom, I will share with you secrets many couples never share about marriage. These are things I have learnt since I got married. I hope you are inspired by it.

The Most Glamorous Part of a Marriage is the Wedding
A gorgeous cake, fresh flowers, wedding gown by Vera Wang, the exotic honeymoon, the paparazzi – all these come into play at the wedding. From the moment the bride wakes up on her wedding day to the moment she spends her first official night as a married woman, she feels on top of the world. Too bad the party can’t last forever.

When you see an elderly couple retaking their marriage vows with tears in their eyes, please note that those are not just tears of happiness; there are tears of a story well told – of joy, pain, courage, sadness and victory against all odds. If you’re not ready to deal with these, it’s not a sin to wait a little. Marriage is hard work and sacrifice.

The Word ‘Sacrifice’ will Suddenly Come up More Often in Your Dictionary
That word we all dread – sacrifice. From the first day, you would find out that you may have to place the needs of others before yours, and if you are blessed with children, get ready for more sacrifices. Will there be times you wish you were single? Yes. Will there be times you wish for one minute to yourself? Definitely. If given the opportunity, would you do it all over again? For most people, YES – especially if you are with the right person.

Marriage is Not for Pretenses or Show-off
Whether you cook with diamonds in your Egusi soup or look like a goddess or even know a thousand styles in bed, a man always knows to whom his heart belongs. The meaning is simple: be yourself before marriage and don’t try to portray what you are not. Let him fall in love with the essence of you not with an image you have created. It’s difficult to fall out of such love except either of you change sometime during the marriage.

You Never Really Know a man/woman Until You get Married
Forget that you two lived in the same house for a few years before marriage, as far as there is no contract binding the two of you together in matrimony, you have not started. People tend to let down their hair when they are married and like an onion, the real us we have kept to ourselves start to unravel. The only thing to do is adjust and move on – you’re in it for real this time.

Marriage is Team Work
Like a job, if you like team work, this role is for you. Just kidding. What I am saying here is that if you don’t work together as a team, you are heading for a major disaster. The unfortunate thing is that you can’t control the other person’s mind and vice versa so one just has to respect the other person’s boundaries, and it’s difficult if both of you are always bent on having your way.

Like a Rollercoaster, There are Ups and Downs
Don’t think that in marriage, every day will be a holiday. You are kidding yourself. In fact, the most ecstatic moments in marriage come after a low period. Like every good story, you will be faced with challenges and tests. Even if you fail one, life will give you an opportunity to repeat the test. But when you pass one, the rewards are priceless.

Marriage is the Ultimate Gamble
Sometimes, marriage leads to happily ever after. Sometimes, it doesn’t. All is fair in love and war. If it doesn’t, dust your feet, learn from past mistakes and start painting a rosy future without giving in to society’s pressures.

Many times, society looks down on divorced women. We are quick to point fingers that it is a woman’s fault that things did not work out. The fact is it could be anybody’s fault. Yes, I know a woman is supposed to be resilient and determined to keep her man, but everyone has their limit of tolerance. We should respect that and not throw stones. If you did not live in their bedroom, try not to judge or place blames. Most times, divorce is the very last option for couples and it is a painful decision to make.

At the end, marriage is about two selfless people living together to achieve each other’s goals. If you find the right person to make that sacrifice with you, you are extremely lucky; as lucky as I am.

Happy Living!

Photo Credit: area254.com
______________________________________________________________________________________________
Ifesinachi Okoli-Okpagu is a writer and marketing consultant, assisting SMEs grow their businesses profitably. She is also the Coordinator of FabulousCity, a brand to motivate women to be the best they can be. You can follow her on Twitter: @ifesinachio_o or send her a mail on [email protected] Visit her website: www.meetifesinachi.com and leave a comment.

Ifesinachi is a published author, screenwriter and student of innovation. She blogs about creative ingenuity at www.30shadesofgenius.com.

87 Comments

  1. Meenah

    April 25, 2013 at 9:38 am

    This is so on point! I love it so much, i had to ‘favourite’ it!.. All women married or otherwise needs to read this and take it in!

    • Purpleicious Babe

      April 26, 2013 at 6:48 pm

      Yup… and even with the phrase “happily ever after” is subjective….

      Good article… we need more people to read this.

      lifeinstagesdoz.blogspot.co.uk/

    • bidibang

      May 6, 2013 at 9:33 am

      WHY ARE PEOPLE PAINTING MARRIAGE AS AN UGLY THING? TUFIAKWA! this is very bad…God created everything and called it good…if you do not understand that marriage is a reflection of God’s love towards human kind please stop getting married…it simply means that a man can be bisexual and if you never knew this and entered into you must love him irregardless of what the man is struggling with same goes for men…God knows all of us and has not yet divorced us…simple and short! there is also deliverance from foul spirits of homosexuality and so on…please i dont care what people paint marriage as, i love that mirror of reflection of God and i will love to partake in it. Marriage is beautiful just PRAY and everything will be fine…Behind a powerful man is a stronger woman…take a look at the life of PASTOR ADEBOYE…his wife is hammering prayers from left to right.

    • temmy

      May 28, 2013 at 12:35 pm

      @ bidibang i like ur spirit but all she has said is from her view and to me very true. marriage is not a bed of roses and every step we take has its own result even pastor Adeboye ll not tell u his marriage is perfect, no marriage is perfect it takes years to get to that level of presume perfection. Also she did not mention marriage has being ugly its a wonderful thing when you are with d right person.

  2. bsky

    April 25, 2013 at 9:41 am

    I love this… This is marriage. I recently got out of a relationship, and i’m so heartbroken. But this has encouraged me. A broken engagement is far and more better than a broken marriage.

    • lustre

      April 25, 2013 at 1:12 pm

      May God fix ur broken heart. i feel u

    • lala

      April 27, 2013 at 11:12 am

      Me too and i feel what you are feeling right now,its not easy and the fact that the break up was through the phone makes it worse for me..i just prayer this moment pass away quick,i have been so down and lazyyyyy

  3. Hot Choco

    April 25, 2013 at 10:04 am

    Hmmm very insightful. I think the bottom line in any marriage is tolerance from both parties.

    • joy

      July 9, 2013 at 8:35 pm

      True. having a mind set of ” IT MUST WORK “… just like a house built that you cannot afford to bring down. training yourselves to see his positive traits….I agree with your final points #kmt 🙂

  4. Funke2

    April 25, 2013 at 10:04 am

    Wonderful article, it applies to both singles and married alike.

  5. Hurperyermie

    April 25, 2013 at 10:04 am

    thanks for this its so educative

  6. Toinlicious

    April 25, 2013 at 10:12 am

    Wise!

  7. Bey

    April 25, 2013 at 10:13 am

    Thanx for sharing this With us..” The part I liked the most is “be yourself before marraige” Don’t try to protray what your not..very important!! Don’t like them fake

  8. Me2me

    April 25, 2013 at 10:14 am

    OOOOO puleeeeez, this is what we all know and tell friends about marriage. Thought u had something more original to write

    • jay

      April 25, 2013 at 10:51 am

      There’s absolutely no reason to be rude. If you feel like you know all of this already, them move on. Some people needed to hear this judging from the other comments so obviously it’s not useless information.
      Bella needs to stop allowing all these unnecessarily negative and rude comments. There’s a trend of people feeling the need to be intellectually superior wise asses when in fact they are just sad aggressive losers hiding behind their computer screens.

    • Tolu

      April 25, 2013 at 2:46 pm

      how is your response not negative in its own right?

    • chelloe

      April 25, 2013 at 2:56 pm

      I quite agree! The people who “think” they know it all are the ones who actually know nothing! Being rude for no just reason! psstt! You must not comment…jeez!

    • me

      April 29, 2013 at 4:56 pm

      hi why do you have such a low IQ no knowledge is wasted and besides a lot of pple dont no know what marriage entails. so if your not interested be silent.

  9. Adeola Ojedokun

    April 25, 2013 at 10:16 am

    True! This is a very lovely post. Thanks

  10. Anonymous

    April 25, 2013 at 10:17 am

    So true!

  11. Sapphire

    April 25, 2013 at 10:23 am

    Lovely write up!Thumbs up

  12. Omototun

    April 25, 2013 at 10:24 am

    Nice one. Some people will come and start shouting “enough with the single/marriage articles” okay……
    So extraterrestrial forces invaded your space, took over your brain and made you click on this feature, but alas they suddenly departed right after you were done reading the feature, so your rant is justified…
    please if the scenario described above does not apply to you….you are a learner…a slow one at that sef.

    • Magz

      April 29, 2013 at 9:02 am

      like! like!! like!!! i’ve always wondered if some people were forced to read some articles with the nature of their comments

  13. Pretty

    April 25, 2013 at 10:25 am

    Nice one,learnt a lot from this.Ifesinachi is that you and your hubby,you fine oooooh

  14. Oh Puhleese

    April 25, 2013 at 10:32 am

    Wow! Well said.

  15. Bleed blue

    April 25, 2013 at 10:33 am

    As lucky as I am too! 🙂
    It’s been 7 years of mostly bliss because hubby and I look in the same direction.

    Having said that, this article does not lie. AT ALL!!!
    Well written Ifesinachi.

  16. nems www.anemistyle.com

    April 25, 2013 at 10:34 am

    Some one told me that marriage is the union of the deaf and the dumb! Scary

  17. Cynthia

    April 25, 2013 at 10:36 am

    Woowww, so inspired .a brilliant write up.

  18. princess

    April 25, 2013 at 10:40 am

    Good write-up, makes a lot of sense.. Don’t allow societal pressures get to u, know what u want and patiently wait for it. The grass always looks greener on the other side, u never know what married people have to deal and contend with cos most people paint a rosy romantic pictures which isnt the whole truth.In the meantime, enjoy ur life, don’t put anything on hold cos tomorrow is promised no one. My philosophy is enjoy or endure every moment, nothing lasts forever.

  19. Anonymous

    April 25, 2013 at 10:44 am

    Well said. May God give men and women the grace to make wise decisions before and when in marriage in Jesus name. Amen

  20. Grace Tsumbu

    April 25, 2013 at 11:02 am

    wao wao wao!!! now that’s some serious eye opening article. Thanks dear Ifesinachi.
    gracistsumbuli.wordpress.com

  21. Dee

    April 25, 2013 at 11:02 am

    Brilliant. Well done BN for listening to your readers. We learnt something for this. To Ifesinachi, thank you for hearing the clarion call (nysc lol) of your fellow women, and submitting this to educate and inform. No tales of woes, but reaility. Oya o, men over to you, I would so love to read something from the perspective of a married man too. Not vanilla articles o, but something real and practical because the 9ja married man has acquired a bad reputation, oya Bros’s and Uncle’s do we women over dramatise and over publicise your flaws? We would love to hear from you. As for the single 9ja brothers too, what are you waiting for. Lol

  22. Gabby

    April 25, 2013 at 11:33 am

    lovely article,it makes sense.

  23. Poshlady

    April 25, 2013 at 11:36 am

    Thank you so much for this article,I was so scared of marriAge before reading this. I feel with this I am ready to get married.like a lot of people do not tell you the truth about marriage.they make it seem like once you are married,then you are happy all the way.but this is not true.anyways I am sure I am with the right person and Gods will for me so what ever comes with marriage,God will see us both through it.love this article

    • OmoBabaLoke

      April 25, 2013 at 6:05 pm

      I feel ya on that…Amen.

  24. jay

    April 25, 2013 at 11:46 am

    Wrong caption i must say…cos i’m married and i do get to share stuff like this with both my married and unmarried friends. And these are propbably things i knew about marriage even before i got married cos i learnt from others too. So next pls….

  25. Dearie

    April 25, 2013 at 11:47 am

    Nice writeup even though we hear most of it on a daily basis. Well done.
    Like my pastor would say “being single is prestigious”. You’ll never understand that line until you get married (no matter how happy your marriage is).

  26. Teris

    April 25, 2013 at 12:29 pm

    “…In this part of the world, we are more idealists than realists. If we face setbacks in business, we are comfortable with reciting the famous words, “it is well’…”

    i’d say we’re more optimistic than we are realistic.
    2. since this is a “secret”, u cud say m’ppl become more practical and get on with the bizness of staying married and hoodwinking the unattached into taking the trip down the aisle 😉

  27. O'Desh

    April 25, 2013 at 12:40 pm

    As luck as I am too…… 🙂

  28. Amazeballs!

    April 25, 2013 at 12:43 pm

    Tell me about it! Marriage teaches you some of life hardest lessons.

  29. dp

    April 25, 2013 at 12:46 pm

    Very fantastic write up i love it very much

  30. ChiboyChuks

    April 25, 2013 at 1:07 pm

    I’m nt married yet… But, seeing it from my parents… It seems true!

    plz, kindly, visit>>> chiboychuks.blogspot.com

  31. Berry Dakara

    April 25, 2013 at 1:26 pm

    Nice write up.

    I have to say though that “Sacrifice” comes up even before marriage. By the time the couple starts talkiing about marriage, it definitely comes up.

    berrydakara.blogspot.com

  32. Opsy

    April 25, 2013 at 1:35 pm

    Marriage just like having a baby, passing an exam and other good things in life, takes a lot of hardwrk work. The gains however, exceed the pains. It is not a fairytale but a conscious decison to love another person with all his flaws and be comitted to making the relationship work. Sometimes all the love you felt for the person during the courtship period fly out of the window after the marriage. I have realised it takes more than the feeling of love to make a marriage work. Before we got married, most of us felt marriage was an escape route from poverty. Our future husands had to have oil and gas or telecommuications job. The reality is that not everybody is that lucky. We found ourselves marrying men who earned less than us. The beauty of it is finding someone to share ones life with. Being married is beautiful since I developed a realistic view about it.

  33. Motun

    April 25, 2013 at 2:32 pm

    Well written…i hope people get the message and not reading for commenting sake.

  34. J.

    April 25, 2013 at 2:34 pm

    Like every other thing in life, marriage is not for everyone. Some people have the annointing for it while others don’t. Seek God and His will for you. Whatever His plans are for your life He’s already enabled u to do it and be victorious if you will continue in His way. Thank u for sharing because many are blinded by a falsehood of fantasy about marriage. Seedtime and harvest- (patience+perseverance)God=still married.

  35. Jenny

    April 25, 2013 at 3:17 pm

    There is a thin line bw love and hate is a phrase that rings true for me. I can love my husband so much it chokes but when he gets on my wrong side,I wonder what I ever saw in him. Every day with him is a learning period. I try to be a better person and instead of raining abuses in my mind,when he annoys me, I bless him. Its like this prayer stuff really works. It gives me a calming effect I never knew existed and bf I know it we r all over each other.

    • hateunrealisticpple

      April 29, 2013 at 4:44 pm

      Awww thank you so much Jenny. That’s a new one and I will start doing that as well. This is importance of making sensible comments

  36. Mousepad

    April 25, 2013 at 3:20 pm

    I dont agree with you totally. I dont agree that you never really know a person until you get married, this may be the case for some people not everyone! I have been married for 3yrs and so far I havent seen anything in my husband that wasnt there when we dated. People always ask me what has changed since we got married and as far his character is concerned, nothing! but are things amplified? Absolutely!!! Did I expect them? sure as heaven I did! Other points you raised are quite valid. Nice write up!

    • Msunderstood

      April 25, 2013 at 4:33 pm

      Me too, no difference or big surprises n it’s been 6 cool years.

  37. Donna

    April 25, 2013 at 3:54 pm

    Some additions from another married woman:

    1. Make him your friend, you go through the tough time easier
    2. Don’t sweat the small stuff e.g when his dirty boxer short is 2″ shy of the laundry basket, don’t get worked out, everyone has some annoying habits.
    3. You might feel lonely in your marriage at a point.
    4. Sometimes you want to kill him (lol) when he makes you angry, when he is asleep, drolling and scratching his balls at the same time, you ask yourself if you made the right choice.
    5. MARRIAGE IS SO MUCH FUN!! I LOVE LOVE

    • Iris

      April 25, 2013 at 4:48 pm

      Number 4….LOL! O Lawd!

    • atutupoyoyo

      April 25, 2013 at 5:12 pm

      LOL…..I AGREE WITH U DONNA……WHEN MY HUBBY SNORES SOMETIMES I SURE WANNA KILL HIM…..SOMETIMES I JUST TAKE MY PILLOW AND GO TO THE OTHER BEDROOM THANK GOD….MAKE E NO USE IM SNORING DESTROY MY BEAUTY SLEEP

    • shayo alabi

      May 17, 2013 at 1:30 pm

      my sister you are on point with that “scratching of ball” why do men do that……so so annoying.

  38. Marriage or Carriage

    April 25, 2013 at 4:59 pm

    1. Dont go into marriage expecting to change your spouse for the better. Your spouse’s flaws become 30% worse after marriage
    2. There is no wrong or right party in a marriage; only conciliation, understanding and peace. If you insist on holding a grudge because you want to maintain your pride and be right, you may end up on the coach, with konji or as a 2nd wife
    3. Prorities will change – especially economic ones. That Vera Wang gown you spent a fortune the size of a South South’s state’s annual budget on? Bad idea, as after the event, it either accumulates dusts in some dead closet or becomes a hand-me-down. 3 years after guests have eaten all your jollof rice at your wedding, you will wonder if you shouldnt have bought a less expensive gown, and used the money instead for a college fund for your kids or towards a deposit for your first home.
    4. You and your partner wont be ‘straffing’ every day like randy nwamkpi goats. That only occurs in the movies ( like the new Nollywood ones – yes I am looking at you Tony Umez). Physical attraction and randiness takes a back seat to mutual respect, companionship and trust. Most days you just want someone you could gist and laugh with in the dark, especially when NEPA does their worst. Nacking isnt bad, but even rice everyday (whether served as ofada, jollof, fried or mass production) gets tiresome.
    5. Relatives will come with their olofofo advice and interventions. Stay clear of them – most have a secret commercial or economic agenda. Some will offer counselling, some will try to take you to a babalawo or quack pastor, some will make you believe that your marital problems are the result of your enemies in the village. Did i say :stay clear of them already?” Try solving your marital issues by yourselves as much as possible.
    6. Visit woahnigeria.wordpress.com. Lol

    • PLUSH & LUSH

      April 25, 2013 at 9:52 pm

      I dey feel you. Me, I just know that given another opportunity, I won’t even think of getting married again…as in AGAIN! I would ban the thought from my mind, cast and bind it from my dreams, and seriously injure anybody who as much as mentions it in passing to me! Yes I said it! The only snag is, having had the children I’m blessed with now, I can’t imagine living without them. #crying#.

    • Oh Puhleese

      April 26, 2013 at 9:02 am

      HAHAHA! Absolutely love your tips! Reality bites.

    • Liz

      April 26, 2013 at 11:18 am

      THUMBS UP!!!

    • Meeeee

      April 27, 2013 at 2:09 am

      Esco, am guessing this is you and if it is you, when are you updating your blog? Post new articles…I enjoy reading them and look forward to new ones. Hope all is well with you and your fam?

  39. Marriageisnotforwimps

    April 25, 2013 at 5:25 pm

    If it doesn’t, dust your feet, learn from past mistakes and start painting a rosy future without giving in to society’s pressures.
    MANTRA

  40. ayomipo

    April 25, 2013 at 5:41 pm

    Marriage, what. I will like to add is that when it comes to marriage, marry someone in YOUR CLASS(both moral&social class), if you don’t the marrige will FAIL.

  41. Mimi luvy

    April 25, 2013 at 6:19 pm

    Wow,nice article…marriage!!not an easy ride,I try to look @ d positive side of my husband most times esp W̶̲̥̅̊н̣̣̣̝̇̇̇e̶̲̥̅̊n he irritates ‎​♍ƺ n wala!!..I stay calm…be strong pepo!!it only gets better as u get older…lol I think:)

  42. Lola

    April 25, 2013 at 6:23 pm

    Love this line Ifesinachi…’At the end, marriage is about two selfless people living together to achieve each other’s goals’. Great article! thanks for sharing 🙂

  43. cathy

    April 25, 2013 at 6:24 pm

    words on the marble.

  44. toou

    April 25, 2013 at 6:37 pm

    True talk! Bin married for close to 4years now, we love each oda n re best of friends, but dere. Re times he annoys me n I start wondering why I married him

  45. James

    April 25, 2013 at 7:00 pm

    Insightful, most people go into marriage without finding out what it takes to have a successful relationship/marriage. They spend time and money planning for the wedding and no time to plan or think of the marriage. People are so consumed with what color to wear on the wedding day, who to invite, where to have the wedding, they plan all this in detail, yet they rely on faith for how the marriage is going to turn out, what to do when one or both loses their job or when children are not forthcoming as expected. If only we will spend same time we spend planning the wedding to plan for the marriage, a lot marriages will be better off today.

  46. chinwe

    April 25, 2013 at 9:26 pm

    Very luvly article…….yeah indeed a broken relationship is far more better than a broken marriage

  47. Adedayo

    April 26, 2013 at 5:55 am

    This is excately why marriage scares d bejesus out of me, the fact that people dont just change,they Transform….Oluwa is in control.i Pray one day soon,i am able to let go ,focus n settle knowing that God is always actively involved…

  48. Omo

    April 26, 2013 at 5:56 am

    Ah ah! Finally, someone wrote a good & much needed article on what marriage is really about. Haven seen so many, many… i mean plenty, colorful, beautiful, expensive Weddings & gorgeous pics on BN this is a breathe of fresh air reminding us all ( married or not) that marriage is
    not all about glitz & glam wedding ceremonies/pics. There is real work in marriage o… after all that party/cutting of cake. The “s” word (S is for SACRIFICE) really stood out to me in this lovely article. Haven been in my marriage for 10 years with a 6 yr old child, Sacrifice is indeed a necessity. Another big one for me personally is ‘KNOWING HOW TO PICK YOUR BATTLE’ & I have used it wisely & it has worked & still working for me. This article really put a big smile on my face as i read thru it, it made me reflect on the last 10 yrs of my marriage & truly see how far i & my hubby have come. It’s been a long road, & amazing how time flies too. Thx for the write up sis’ ! I really enjoyed it.

  49. Omo

    April 26, 2013 at 6:22 am

    Hey BN, i want to thank u for my name Tag/I.d/sign or whatever u call this ur new design or style. I really like it( the color & the design). Thx 4 not giving me a UFO looking tag

  50. Ifesinachi Okoli-Okpagu

    April 26, 2013 at 7:44 am

    Thanks for your comments. I have learnt a lot. I celebrated my anniversary yesterday and didn’t have time to comment but I can say in summary: getting married to your friend is great; when those ‘down’ times come, you get really angry but you can handle it. And when the ‘great’ times come, *sigh*…you feel on top of the world.

  51. spicy

    April 26, 2013 at 9:33 am

    Hmmmm…. walking down the aisle in a few months is starting to feel a bit scary now -_-

  52. ngblaq

    April 26, 2013 at 12:14 pm

    Wow and wow
    interesting article
    Thanks

  53. Sandra

    April 26, 2013 at 12:18 pm

    humm my first five years in marraige was not too easy.. i was tinking i will be pampered they way my hubby used to pamper me but i got it all wrong, i remember when i used to weat my pillow every night and he would be fast asleep, what bothers me ment nothing to him, at a time i resolted into prayers got so closed to God and ignore most of those challenges and then he started coming back thinking i was cheating cos i no longer complain…my own take on this is handle everything to God and he will guide u through things and getting real normal now we hardly even quarel any more i have so much understand my husband that i can tell what is on his mind…well relationship is fantasy marriage is true Life story….lol

    • maudlyn

      April 28, 2013 at 9:34 pm

      love this

  54. jcsgrl

    April 26, 2013 at 2:44 pm

    Wow! Beautiful write-up *claps hand with standing ovation. That’s the reality of marriage. Its sweet, its bitter. You cry, you laugh. Some days you wonder what you ever saw in him and maybe you should have listened to your parents. Some days you don’t know how you could ever live without him. You pray that hopefully the good days outnumber the bad and when it doesn’t seem like it you run to God and draw wisdom and inspiration to make it through. You sacrifice, sometimes its worth it. sometimes it seems a total waste! That’s marriage but I wouldn’t have it any other way especially if done with the RIGHT person

  55. Sean Carter

    April 26, 2013 at 2:46 pm

    some really great observances and advice, I got ordained through the Universal Life Church and have been called on to perform a weddings, I think its the advice like this that can really help a couple understand what they are getting into

  56. dede

    April 27, 2013 at 12:44 am

    I’m married and I can tell you this is 100% true. But ladies need to know that the grass is only greener where you water it. SO happy marriage will require work. And always make sure that you and your partner have the same goals. It makes life a little easier.

  57. kfa

    April 27, 2013 at 3:30 pm

    Best write up to me on bella naija..

  58. omo

    April 27, 2013 at 8:15 pm

    @ Ifesinachi, happy wedding anniversary to u & ur hubby. Really happy for u, congratulations. I’m looking forward to my 10 yrs anniversary in November by the special grace of GOD! Really excited i & my hubby made it this far. God is really good.

  59. Topsy

    April 30, 2013 at 12:28 pm

    Hmmmmm…..wel said….iv learnt a whole lot. God help me wif makin a choice

  60. honeymix...

    May 3, 2013 at 8:03 am

    Nice write-up,i must say,if dis write-up did not do you any good,why did you take your precious time to read all to the end,and stil comment on it.just like the gospel has not reached all parts of the world so as this kinda advice not reached all ears,you cannot always favor everyone.i learnt some stuffs here sha.

  61. jacks

    June 2, 2013 at 9:30 pm

    I don’t see the point in marriage…. any committed long term unmarried couple can be just as happy or miserable as a married couple minus the debt incurred throwing a wedding so some grown women can be the center of attention of a day or 2. Some of you “grown folks” are so emotionally and financially immature. I don’t want to hear “marriage takes work…” no RELATIONSHIPS take work, or “the ring/ceremony is a sign of love and commitment”…no showing up everyday to a relationship is a sign of love and commitment, being faithful to your spouse is a sign of love and commitment.

  62. ROSE

    July 2, 2013 at 12:53 pm

    I LOVE THE ARTICLE IT MAKE SENCE JOO

  63. Dianabasi

    July 9, 2013 at 7:57 pm

    Well nice article ,but i believe that all things r possible the bible says so,when u belief. It also says my pple perish for lack of wisdom.some pple enter into marriage with out any knowledge of it( reading of marriage related books, marriage audio tape etc) that will help them. By the way do we ladies know that the way men think, sense tins,reason,solve problems is different from ours. He may say something and u interprete in another way etc. If we ladies seek informatn in marriage, how men are wired in nature, how they think etc they way we do for our education, jobs etc, i believe we will have a wonderful marriage as God intends to an enduring marriage.the ignorant ones are enduring,the informed once are living happily ever after.if u r married and nt enjoying ur married u can stil enjoy it by being positive (ie changing ur present mentality and believing that ur marriage must work, train urself to see his postve traits.then do wat i said above ..read marriage bks etc. Thanks. We are the architect of our lives ,i dnt belief in chance. We make our lifes wat it is in every area. Thanks

  64. ANNE

    July 11, 2013 at 10:37 am

    please more of articles like this.thank-you

  65. Biha

    July 28, 2013 at 10:20 pm

    Nice write up

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