Fola Daniel Adelesi: Permission to Succeed

Many of us have dreams of our own but are quick to forget something very important regarding the success of that dream. We imagine all that we want to do. We create all the ideas that need to be created. We even spend sleepless nights trying to put all the needed documents in order. Just when we have the perfect picture of the dream, we then release the permission to succeed to other people by asking them to validate our dreams.

Rather than encourage us, some of them just deflate all the inspiration that’s in us. They go on to tell us how things can’t work and how many others have failed. They never have good experiences handy. It’s the bad ones they are quick to remember, and they begin to take our strength for the dream in a very subtle way. A few of them do this because they are naturally negative. Some others do it because they are jealous and they can’t imagine you being the super achiever. There are those who also do it because they have not stretched their minds enough and just can’t imagine what you are talking about.

Please note that big dreams are ‘impossibilities’ for small minds. The size of unimaginable things that someone can agree with shows how big their minds are. They may never have seen it before but if they are willing to try then they have a big mind. If they are not willing to try and also discouraging others from trying then they have a small mind.

Whoever does not give you an assignment has a limited right and opinion in validating that assignment. There’s a limit to what they can offer or say to you. You got the dreams on your own. They had no idea how it came to you. They did not know what you were thinking about when the ideas dropped on your mind.

Over the years, too many people have given their permission to succeed to other people. You let them decided whether you can forge ahead or not. You let them tell you if it’s okay to meet the next people that will help you succeed. So honestly, the reason you are not succeeding yet is not because your success has not come. It is because you have released the permit to someone else. They now determine if you are happy or you remain sad. They get to choose if you will achieve or not.

The dreams that you have conceived on your own do not need the validation of other people for you to work them through. You can run your ideas by other people. When you do that, you are asking their opinion to make it a better idea. You are not asking them to tell you if you can go ahead or you can’t. You don’t even want them to tell you if it can work or not.

Dr. Tai Solarin was told that the Mayflower School project would fail. He had left Molusi College in Ijebu Igbo to start a school in the forest of Ikenne. He and his British wife, Sheila, and the first set of students were the ones who built the first two blocks of classrooms in that school. The building was the class during the day and the hostel at night. They later managed to build a cubicle beside those first two blocks that became their house and office. Their first laboratory was a big box. When inspectors came from the ministry to inspect the school, he was asked to take them to the laboratory. He brought out the box and showed them the compartments for Physics, Chemistry and Agriculture.

The inspectors laughed at him and thought he was a joker. A reverend gentleman also said the school would not last. Many people said so many things. Well, I don’t need to tell you if the school succeeded or not. I guess you know or have heard about Dr. Tai Solarin. In case you haven’t heard much about him then I should tell you I went to that same school (that someone said would not last) 40 years after it was founded. I think that happened because Dr. Tai or Oga Tasere as they call him and his wife did not give their permission to succeed to other people. Today, the children of this great couple still run that school which eventually acquired more lands over the years to become one of the biggest high schools in the country.

When you let what other people say determine what you do about your dream, you have given them your permission to succeed in life. From that time, they will determine what you do. Again, it is important for me to say clearly that you should listen to people but the final decision is still yours. You are the leader of your life and the responsibility of your life is yours. You will never be able to blame anyone for the decisions they took on your behalf.

Check yourself today. What are you doing and why are you doing it? Can you possibly do more than what you are doing or you have given away your permission to succeed? Who’s that person whose opinion now counts so much that none of your brilliant ideas see the light of the day?

You need to peg the control you have given to others over your life and take charge. You will always be blamed for what didn’t go right even if everyone saw who did it so long as it’s your life. Take charge and never leave your permission to succeed with someone else.

Photo Credit: hecticparents.com
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Fola Daniel Adelesi is a professional public speaker who also trains other speakers, an author, business consultant and highly skilled master of ceremony with excellent poise and diction. He was on the Debaters TV reality show season 1, presented ‘You Can’ on Radio Continental in 2011, did motivational segments on Galaxy TV from Dec 2008 to August 2009 and has authored 3 books including Writing Business Proposal