Peculiar Okafor: Climbing the Ladder of Success in Stilettos

A lot has happened this recently that has centred around females and feminism – from #BanBanBossy, to Beyonce being referred to as anti-feminist. To my understanding, these all infer that there are certain ways women should behave,  else they be labelled terrorists. Also, the belief that certain rules should apply to enable women succeed and as someone who believes strongly in women empowerment, I feel I have to speak out.

First of all, we cannot ask for liberation from the male folk because they did not enslave us in the first place. When women make so much propaganda about men treating us fairly and giving us our due then we indirectly acknowledge that they are some form of masters from which we need to obtain freedom-  and that in itself is degrading, because male and female are created equal in the sight of God.

Secondly, life is a game where the fittest survive and no one is willing to hand you positions. My dear queens, don’t ask your male folks, you have to demand it. Men have always known this and have been willing to face all odds to succeed.

Thirdly, I do believe it is time of the female folk, as this is one era where soft skills makes most of the difference. In ancient times, it was a show of physical strength and so men seemingly took the lead. However, this is the age where interpersonal skills, discernment and the ability to get the best out of people with the least force gets you to the top.

In addition, I believe that women should fully express their femininity, as the way to get the best out of life is to be your best you. Enough of this trying to be like men, we are women. We are beautiful, and girls this in itself is power.

Ever noticed how being beautiful gets the attention of the men. Now imagine walking into an office with a male colleague and getting the attention first because you are beautiful. Now you can maximise that by showcasing your brains and skills or you can be stupid and start an affair, it’s your cup of tea. But your femininity opened the door.

In reality, I believe females, especially those in Africa, were not encouraged to acquire skills necessary in leadership positions. Skills like assertiveness, emotional stability (ever noticed how most of us have mood swings?) and a strong sense of self and purpose. I have always believed that the world stands still for the (wo)man who knows where she’s going.

So ladies, enough of all this screaming and demanding from men. Have a plan, take realistic steps to fulfill it. Follow the rules, and play the game like the beautiful woman that you are. I do not believe in acting like a man or stifling my femininity. Let the men climb the ladder of success in their boots. I’ll climb mine in stilettos and I promise I’ll get there first- in time to touch up on my hair and makeup before they arrive.

Photo Credit: Dreamstime | R. Gino Santa Maria / Shutterfree, Llc

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Peculiar Okafor is a marketing communications executive and loves to write. Visit her blog ‘www.designersuitcases.blogspot.com‘ to read her stories.