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Actress Victoria Inyama has a Message for Young Ladies “Chasing Married Men”

BellaNaija.com

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Victoria Inyama

Veteran Nollywood actress Victoria Inyama has a message to share this afternoon.

She posted a new photo on Instagram and captioned:

Good morning?I just want to think aloud. They say what goes around comes around. My target are d younger girls yea. At this your young correct age, You gat everything on d freshness side going for U, And You dating A married man, cool, clap for yourself in @nedu_wazobiafm voice. Forward slash many years later, You get married to d love of your life, Prince Charming?A good man, D hubby of lyfe. Only problem is! He’s also taking care of another babe or babes? like d one that took care of U?. Now u vexing, fighting & in a Rage. Why?????? U forget so soon. Have u forgotten how u insulted d wife?. How u flaunted d love loot???You even allowed baby to form! He even married U. Now he wants to marry No 3 and u don enter church???. Plssssssss. 1st is to look for all d madams that have cried cause of U and apologise for d hurt and pain u caused them. Then make peace with Karma. If you no been do, men will still be men but God won’t allow U to be over thrown. But if u been do then my dear chill and don’t kill another woman’s son. So, AV broken it down. Ma young beautiful chics, pls mind how it all happens now cause like a boomerang, it all comes back around so mind how u throw and flex. Study hard. Work hard. Pray hard. Don’t compare your progress to anyone’s. Don’t let your family cause u to do them things cause if it all turns bad, it’s your mom and siblings that will abuse u pass??. Just saying?. Have a blessed day. Be wise#live#love#learn

59 Comments

  1. t2

    August 4, 2016 at 1:31 pm

    Story for the gods

  2. babe

    August 4, 2016 at 1:42 pm

    she just said d truth….if u r doing it back off,if not hhhmmnnnnn,by the time u get in n those fresh babes start bouncing on ur marriage wit ur hubby, u go wan enter grave ooo…. u may not see point in wat she has said now but wen u get married, u will kw hw it feels…. n as 4 u wey talk say story for the Gods, am sure nah u go cry pass wen ur karma start chasing u about.

    • A

      August 4, 2016 at 3:11 pm

      I don’t see why everything is about marriage and husband. It’s not good for YOURSELF. YOUR name, YOUR body, YOUR soul, YOUR reputation. When you went to the same school and wrote the same exams with these men, but yet you depend on them for money that you can easily be making. And it goes for men too. Many of them date richer older women and even men for money. Why do that for Chanel, LV and Gucci. It’s like a curse, it can never end well. Fornicating with your boyfriend is bad, yes. But putting a pricetag on your priceless body especially at the expense of someone else’s marriage… Lobatan

  3. sisi

    August 4, 2016 at 1:49 pm

    Honestly not fair!!! I agree with her very well and I say the same to anyone around me with such behaviour. please leave married men alone and build yourself up. naso my neighbour go change woman frequently like pure water e no concern me oh!!! until I see one babe I knew back then in secondary skl my junior with the man I had the chance to advice her when she was claiming over familiarity with me each time she comes ard. since then the babe no enter my house again.

  4. nana

    August 4, 2016 at 2:07 pm

    Preach it baby, tell them. It doesn’t matter what you did in d past, all that matters is your ability to recognize that you made mistakes and then make peace with your soul. Karma is a bitch, young girls please leave married men alone, at least don’t cry wolf when it comes back to you.

  5. mins

    August 4, 2016 at 2:08 pm

    Story that touches the heart.

  6. meme

    August 4, 2016 at 2:18 pm

    experience talking…

  7. Ememobong

    August 4, 2016 at 2:18 pm

    Is she talking from experience??!!

    • A

      August 4, 2016 at 3:07 pm

      What does it matter? Even if she’s a popular runs girl, does that make her advice less true?

  8. Bossy

    August 4, 2016 at 2:27 pm

    you are right. not everyone that listen to u because not every human being are been created by God. most ladies u see outside with beautiful faces i tell u that not all of them are real….. some are snakes, lion, goat and fish they just form into human being in order to wicked men and married men….. Men please i beg u to beware of girls u move around pray before u choose the RIGHT not the WRONG person..

  9. Chidera

    August 4, 2016 at 2:28 pm

    …and what if she’s talking from experience? since when did it become a crime to talk from experience? abeggi! and for the men who always prefer “stolen meat” I hail o

  10. Just saying

    August 4, 2016 at 2:34 pm

    Sometimes whether you date them or not, if your husband wants to cheat on you he will. All the same. Nothing to gain from dating married men. Is it money they are giving you that you cannot work hard to make??

  11. Mama

    August 4, 2016 at 2:36 pm

    The problem with Nigeria is our lack of divorce laws and belief that marriage is a do or die affair. Otherwise lots of women would have left their marriages and a lot of men would have filed for divorce. Women won’t leave because of shame and for financial reasons. Men won’t file because of societal pressures. A lot of married couples are just not compatible. And the men find happiness outside while the women either wallow in grief or if they are bold find a nice young hunk. My dear young girls open your eyes to marry. Pray for Gods wisdom to direct you to the right man. Not to any man. Same for the young guys. An unhappy marriage is like a cancer.

    • A

      August 4, 2016 at 3:14 pm

      There are divorce laws and they are increasingly protective of women. But the fact is that Nigerian women love being Mrs more than they love being alive. All the billionaire daughters married to beasts nko. How many of them divorce. It’s very sad. The men don’t bother filing because they can sleep around and have the stability of a wife-maid who makes sure everything is good, raise your children well, makes your best meals at the right time, and will be there for you if you fall sick or get broke.

  12. Prince

    August 4, 2016 at 2:45 pm

    When she dey chase she hear anybody. story story

    • Naijatalk

      August 5, 2016 at 1:16 am

      If you do not have proof of her ‘chasing’ then It’s best you say nothing.

  13. Vera

    August 4, 2016 at 3:04 pm

    I gat you but there is nothing God cannot fix. If both parties keep looking out matter don scatter na! Iv cried and cried in my marriage. Different girls every day. Tears no fit come again. No position I never try. No food I neva cook. If I had the financial means I guess I would take my kids and walk. Looking back I guess we were in a hurry. Would I marry him again? Never! But Iv made my bed. God will help me lie in it.

  14. nunulicious

    August 4, 2016 at 3:12 pm

    A few years ago, a very dear friend hit a rough patch in her marriage and in her mind, they were trying to work things out. On a saturday, she was in a cab as she had a few errands to run and while at the traffic light stop, she lifted her eyes and saw her husband dressed gorgeously in Ankara fabric with another young lady by his side in the same Ankara fabric…the body language said it all. To any third party, they were either dating or soon to be married.
    So my friend in a bid to save her marriage inquired and did james bond move about the girl. found out where she lived, then asked, begged and pleaded with her to leave her husband alone. Begged her for the sake of her two year marriage. Begged her for the sake of her 7 month old child. When that didn’t work, my friend went to the girls guardians and begged them to beg her. When that didn’t work, my friend watched and waited.
    The girl was 23 years old.
    Years later, each person has gone their way. My dear friend is a single mother, the husband walked out. He is not with the 23 year old girl either. I know the former 23 year old girl. I am waiting for her to get married. She will then know karma is a bitch and sometimes it comes in form of dear friends of your married ex-lovers wife.

    • "changing moniker"

      August 5, 2016 at 12:43 am

      Awon friends aiye

    • Olajumoke

      August 5, 2016 at 10:16 am

      Waoh you’ve gat it all worked out

    • Southern

      August 5, 2016 at 11:26 am

      Damn gurrrrllllll!!!!!!!??

  15. Paul Adeyemo

    August 4, 2016 at 3:28 pm

    Awon hypocrites dede. NAIJA men rules.

    • Paul why now

      August 4, 2016 at 3:38 pm

      What of the Bible that said “thou shall not commit adultery” “you shall submit to one another” and “thou shall honor the wife of his youth.” I guess God made allowance for Nigerian men to cheat and be beastly because He will understand when you meet him at the gate of Heaven, especially as long as you insult and blast gay people to make up for your own sin

    • Nahum

      August 4, 2016 at 5:20 pm

      Naija men rule but definitely not you. Just like that moron Bruno, you rule in the “I am jobless” department. As Pastor Adeboye said, go and find a job. No food for a lazy man. Rule your finances first before you come and start trolling BN.

    • Suspect

      August 4, 2016 at 8:37 pm

      Toksvision is this you?

  16. Paul why now

    August 4, 2016 at 3:44 pm

    BN did you put “chasing married men” as shade? Abi you don’t know that it’s the babes that chase the men these days. The girls go to the hotels and bars, business class lounges etc. the men go there and choose from the meat available. I mean not 100% of the time, but it happens

  17. Abbie

    August 4, 2016 at 3:54 pm

    Really? woman will nvr learn. Instead of casing this gals, Chase ur husbands bcos I am not married n not going after anyone’s husband but from what I see everyday, going after aside chic means u ‘ve already lost ur man. Talk to him not the gal or gals me.

  18. vora

    August 4, 2016 at 3:55 pm

    Dat u dated a married man doesnt mean ur hubby wld cheat on u.some married as virgins to men who can cheat for d whole of naija..victoria u sound pained abi young girls don dey service ur hubby…

    • Naijatalk

      August 5, 2016 at 1:23 am

      Sorry, he will cheat or do worse. There’s a law in the universe about reaping what you sow. That law never fails.

  19. Californiabawlar

    August 4, 2016 at 3:59 pm

    Lmaoo….her husband he a cheating ko? Sorry o!

    On a serious note. I now fully understand why women should be addressed for getting involved with married men.
    My married ex is reaching out to me like crazy and I fleeing from him with the same fervor. I refuse to even be a part of the a ‘friendship’ with someone who declared his undying love 2 days to his wedding. Tufia! Now, while I really loved him and it’s taking every single strand of moral fiber in me not to respond, it’s just the right thing to do.
    If he wants to cheat, let it not be with me. If I was the one that got away and the only prospect for an affair, then even better for everyone!

    I was previously of the school of thought that your partner is the only one to be held accountable, and that is correct for the most part. But the ‘other person’ also owes it to themselves and should respect the institution of marriage and refuse to be that person.

    • Delta geh

      August 4, 2016 at 4:33 pm

      God bless you for not responding to him and I pray that your husband or husband to be will never cheat on you in Jesus name! You be better person.

    • Ima

      August 4, 2016 at 4:43 pm

      Story of my life! Ghosting mode activated, abeg. I have no time for such people (difficult though it may be sometimes), and I truly feel I dodged a bullet with that one.
      Meanwhile, I’m spending my time building new skills, meeting new people, travelling, and ticking off what what supposed to be ‘our’ bucket list. Life is good!

    • Ada Nnewi

      August 4, 2016 at 10:21 pm

      California Bawler you’re very right…. I cannot count the number of married men that have tried to get me to have a relationship with them but once you are married outside any talk of how is your familu and how is work i will not have with you? Can we hang out? I say No or just avoid you like a plague till you get the message? Can i come and visit? I say i’m hardly ever home? Can i send you some money? I don”t need your money abeg?…. I make it very clear that a married man to me is expired goods… If every other women did same, these men would have no one to cheat with…

    • Ada Nnewi

      August 4, 2016 at 10:24 pm

      California Bawler you’re very right…. I cannot count the number of married men that have tried to get me to have a relationship with them but once you are married any talk outside, how is your family and how is work? I will not have with you…..Can we hang out? I say No or just avoid you like a plague till you get the message? Can i come and visit? I say i’m hardly ever home… Can i send you some money?, i say,I don”t need your money abeg…. I make it very clear that a married man to me is expired goods… If every other women did same, these men would have no one to cheat with…

    • Naijatalk

      August 5, 2016 at 1:27 am

      God bless you

    • Naijatalk

      August 5, 2016 at 1:26 am

      God will bless you for this wisdom nugget. Women should at least respect themselves and make themselves unavailable to married men, particularly if you are well aware that the man is married. Haba!

  20. AB

    August 4, 2016 at 4:11 pm

    it is well Vera…there is a beautiful story in every storm and no situation with God in it, that cannot change! That change might have to begin with YOU. You learning how to listen to the voice of God when you pray and deal with a man who will not learn to live women alone whilst in Marriage. and learning how to be whole again and Especially how to pray for your husband…it is ONLY God that can change him and nobody else not even you unfortunately! In the mean time hunny dust yo fine self up, look good, smell good, love God like never before, focus on your children (if you have any) , hang out with good friends, find something you enjoy doing and start small or learn a craft! By the time he realizes that home gal don’t have a care in the world about his cheating ass + all the prayers you are firing he will wake up! Hopefully its not too late for him by then too ! BE YOU BOO!!!!

  21. Anon

    August 4, 2016 at 4:13 pm

    Perhaps also leave some nuggets of wisdom for the men who choose to engage in marital infidelity. Our society is so quick to blame the women when it comes to these things but we give the men a hall pass as if it does not take two to tango. And this is just an example of that.

  22. E

    August 4, 2016 at 4:15 pm

    …..who advices married men chasing single girls?

    • Mama

      August 5, 2016 at 4:35 pm

      Na that one i still dey wait for. Seems there’s an unspoken agreement to always lay the blame on the girl and not the man. that is akin to leaving in denial. How won’t such men continue to be reckless when the so called karma is coming only for the female partner:. and if we follow this logic of karma, does that mean the wife herself also chased married men and is being paid back in return? See, it is high time we stop shying way from addressing wayward husbands who are the ones breaking wedding vows instead of facing the girl alone.

  23. Keyyna

    August 4, 2016 at 4:17 pm

    Everytime, “Husbands snatching” by small girls. When will someone hear “Wives snatching” by small boys. The message should be for all (both Men and Women, Married or Single ) to fear God and keep His commandments. Be Righteous. Jesus will come back to RAPTURE His children. Do not put asunder to what God has joined together. As far as I am concerned people that go about lamenting about Karma this Karma that, Husbands snatched and husbands married more wives are clearly people who God did not join them with their spouses. If God did, they will get on their knees and sort their problems prayerfully and quietly. Since the beginning there has been some form of Men snatching wives from their husbands and likewise. It doesn’t make it RIGHT, but it clearly shows it might never end, not because people talk about it everyday. If the woman is tired of seeing her husband sleep around then she should separate from him, and bear in mind that she cannot remarry if she is one that adheres to the bible. If she wants to resort to fight all the so called husbands snatchers in public, well, she is the one that will get frustrated because it will be a fuel that will call the so called husbands to find more secretive measure to wallow in adultery. With that being said, married people (men and women) should find means to keep the spark alive in their marriages. At least they should try replicating the kind on enjoyment they are looking for outside on their spouses for a change. If none cant hold their pants together, clearly the person needs DIVINE INTERVENTION… Pls NIGERIA NEEDS TO BE A BETTER PLACE. Lets help fight Corruption.

  24. OJB

    August 4, 2016 at 6:04 pm

    They say its a man’s world! If every woman can be faithful to one partner, life will be a lot better because I don’t know understand what a woman or a young lady would gain by dating married man or men. Some ladies would say the guy is young so I can date him forgetting that what goes around comes around! MAY SUCH LADIES NEVER LOCATE OUR HUSBAND IN JESUS NAME! AMEN

    • chief

      August 4, 2016 at 6:59 pm

      @OJB yes it’s a man’s world because it’s in our DNA to have more sexual activity for sex and it’s our entitlement as men.Sometimes men cheat because women help them,men will stop cheating if desperate women stop helping them especially young ladies chasing after married men.

    • abi

      August 5, 2016 at 1:15 am

      Sorry Chief but I’ve never met a man with a higher sex drive than me. And I’m not promiscuous. Quality over quantity. And this entitlement you speak of…you best rethink it else you mess with the Lauren Bobbits of this world. Not all of us advocate the War Room method.

    • NationalSquirrel

      August 6, 2016 at 11:10 am

      You should pray for your husband not to have wandering eyes and for him to have self control

  25. Joke

    August 4, 2016 at 7:17 pm

    Sorry to say, but prostitution is almost like a right of passage for girls in Nigeria, particularly Lagos. It’s just what people do. It is so normalized and it is sickening. I began uni at Unilag and I saw major things. I never did it, but it was all around me and it was very accepted. My father and his friends slaughtered girls left and right. Too many stories to tell. Even in some families, family members including mothers encourage their relatives/daughters to be prostitutes and it’s not even poor people. I’m talking okay to rich families, but with the “greed is good” mentality. However, I don’t know about this karma thing always working though. My mum never cheated with a married or any man as a matter of fact, but my dad cheated on her and even married another wife. He is really suffering in other ways though, so maybe that karma is the one working for her…

    • Naijatalk

      August 5, 2016 at 1:34 am

      I’m sorry to hear about what your mum went through.

  26. tunmi

    August 4, 2016 at 11:08 pm

    To be a man and never be the subject of these wàhálà. Focus on the guy you married, they are the ones pestering the women.

  27. T-baby

    August 5, 2016 at 4:30 am

    Hmm I have never said this out to any one before.. But I just felt like saying it out now. I married my hubby as a Virgin (Never cheated or dated any one before) we have 2 beautiful kids together. I love my hubby n love him more bcos of how hard working n dedicated he is.., very caring n success driven. He doesn’t keep friends or attend any party. I knw a couple of his friends (not close but atleast we talk over the phone) that cheat on their wives. I would tell my hubby in scared bcos he might be influenced but he would tell me that’s never his priority that all he wants us to be successful in life. We live abroad and he usually visits naija. During his last trip from naija I got a shocker of my life. He uses a blackberry phone and a iPhone. He was new to the iPhone and didn’t knw how it really works. I ran out of picture space on my phone and asked him to give me his iPhone to take some pictures. He took the away for some time and came back and gv it to me (he deleted some pictures and didn’t know they can still be viewed at the recently deleted menu) I got the phone and after a while I something just told me to check the recently deleted box.. I saw pictures of my husband and a lady FaceTiming. The lady was bra less, my husbdand was laughing and enjoying the view. Saw diff pictures of him with same girl at a restaurant in Nigeria, pictures of him with another girl ha! Let me just stop here. I cried and cried because I didn’t believe my very honest and homely Bobo will ever do this to me. Well, that nite I showed him all the craze in this world and even called police on him. Oh sorry it’s a long epistle.. I just needed to say it to someone. It still hurts whenever I think about it??

    • Candy

      August 5, 2016 at 9:33 am

      I’m really sorry sweetie. Some times these men can’t just be trusted. We think they’re faithful and caring one minute then the next we get a shocker. I’m single right now and i don’t really want to rush into marriage, so many stories i hear are so discouraging. God is your strength T-baby, though calling the police on your hubby was going a bit too far but what do i know lol.

    • NationalSquirrel

      August 6, 2016 at 11:07 am

      Cheating friends ruin a good man.
      You’re even lucky your husband’s mess never got to your attention until you checked his deleted items – because you live abroad. Sigh nawa

  28. NationalSquirrel

    August 5, 2016 at 10:16 am

    Hmmh. Thanks for this. I honestly had fallen head over heels for this married young guy at work who has fallen out of love with the “wife of his youth”. She got pregnant after uni and he married her before nysc sef.
    He’s grown now (35) (I am 26) and he’s more refined and it seems I am who he would have wanted, or his type if he had waited.
    It took me 6 months to fall in love after he chased me all this while. Last night, I couldn’t sleep, I have been contemplating his relationship offer all night. Woke up to see this.
    I guess this is God.
    I have cut friends off for dating married men, even when they said they were in love or needed monetary help. And now, I guess my own morals have been tested. In the right or tempting enough situation, integrity is tested.
    Thank You Victoria abi whatever your name is.

    He is so fine that I was not even minding the eminent karma that would befall me.
    I applied to move departments at work because of him. Today, I start afresh and anew.
    Thank You for ministering to me.
    I kuku build my career and wait for my own.
    If he is meant for me, he will be a single man again, because of irreconcilable differences, not because I pulled him away.

    Otherwise, my own will come, if marriage is meant for me.

    • nana

      August 5, 2016 at 11:12 am

      @NationalSquirrel, thank you for your sincerity and for choosing to accept the truth and move on. God will bless you with your own man. Like you said, if he’s meant for u, he will come back as a single man and not because you broke his home. People like you are rare, no matter what people say, you took the bold and best step .

  29. MEEEEEE

    August 5, 2016 at 11:05 am

    @NationalSquirrel, that guy wants to waste your life!! trust me you deserve better, he wants you for your body and body alone. run! run!

  30. ebony

    August 5, 2016 at 11:14 am

    sincerely speaking, the married guys that loves to cheat should just simply change their ways. if you ask me, they are the ones who go after young impressionable girls, spitting sweet nothings in their head. when i was a single lady,a married guy cajoled me for about 3yrs. telling me how there was nothing wrong in us seeing each other and how he will not in anyway disturb my relationship with any guy i want to date. he further went on to mention how he sponsored his former girlfriend in school and when she wanted to marry, he gave her about N1.5million for her wedding. but mehn! i always shook my head and said no and i always pitied the wife and kids. another married guy told me he made a mistake by telling me he was married and that i started behaving one kain since he told the truth. its really pathetic o.

  31. TA

    August 5, 2016 at 12:57 pm

    Someone needs to talk to this men too to stop running after single girls. There’s this guy that works in my office, he’s been asking me out for more than 2 years. I finally agreed to out with him this year, he told me he was single. He has met my family members. I just discover recently he’s married with children

  32. NationalSquirrel

    August 5, 2016 at 3:40 pm

    Thank you dear. I brokke it down to him today oh. He looked so fine and smells so good today. I said the words and walked away, and until I comee to terms with it fully, I will go the other way whenever I see him. HR approved my application to move department’s. I’ll soon be working on another floor. Sigh

  33. Dupsy

    August 5, 2016 at 5:56 pm

    @ Candy, thank you very much for your concern and I wish you all the best in marriage. I knew I went a bit too far in calling police on him. I didn’t know I would call the police on my husband Everrr! You know that helpless situation that you just don’t know what the heck is going on in your mind. I haven’t experienced such before, (about 14years marriage) and I didn’t know what to do and I hate calling any 3rd party in my marriage. I called police cos he denied having an affair with the lady or ladies. Even though I saw pictures oo? And the most annoying thing is, those girls are not even as fine as the worst thing in my body. Thanks again for your concern dear.. I feel light and better saying it out. Sigh!

  34. ardnas

    August 8, 2016 at 3:40 pm

    uhmmm….my own gist is that my married boss is on my case. I told him I can’t, am seriously hustling another Job just in case. He said he will stop, I pray he does, God help me.

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