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Lami Phillips gets Real with the Ladies | Says “I think a lot of women carry resentment around their whole lives”



Singer Lami Phillips shared some real talk this morning on her Instagram page.

She spoke about how often times women focus on all their responsibilities without taking time out to care for themselves. She adds that women sacrifice so much and sometimes, it causes resentment.

Read her post below.

Are you taking care of yourself dear woman? I know you’ve got responsibilities.. especially if you are a wife and mother.. but where do YOU fit in? You deserve joy.. peace of mind.. fulfilment. Yes .. YOU. When last did you do something for yourself? When last did you take a day off or a night out? There never really is a good time. There will always be STUFF to sort out. I did an informal survey and asked a number of women ” are you happy”? Sadly over half of them either said NO or I DONT KNOW. I asked some older women if they were happy when they were raising their kids and younger in marriage they mostly laughed .. one said ” back then it wasn’t even about being happy.. we just knew our place and our duty.. we never felt our needs were valid”. I think a lot of women carry resentment around their whole lives. They feel left out.. they feel they lost their youth.. most die worn out.. taking care of everyone but themselves. My mother in law ( God bless her) would say ” my dear.. don’t kill yourself.. if you do .. life will still go on ” Some women run themselves ragged and then die of stress .. the man just mourns then remarries. Where do YOU fit in? Yes take care of your home.. your husband.. do that.. but please take care of you. You are entitled to weekly pampering.. quarterly vacations.. an hour of rest during the day doing NOTHING .. you are entitled to a worry free life.. you are entitled to calm.. you are entitled to laughter with friends and guilt free fun.. don’t grow old before your time. Remember .. I “we don’t get a refund on our days” a day lived is a day gone..~ Lami Phillips . So LIVE. A large part of this is learning to say NO.. also coming to terms with what YOU Can’t do.. learning to be selfish… learning to protect yourself. People will push and drag.. have your boundaries . You’ll offend some but those who sincerely love you will understand. Please dear woman.. listen.. you have just one shot at life. Make it count . Hope that helps someone xx #LamiTalks ©™ #LIVINGLami ©™


  1. bliss

    January 13, 2017 at 12:45 pm

    lami am sure you’re speaking for yourself. I’ve heard some people say they can’t allow you in their click because you gossip in the guise of concern for someone.

    • Sevenade

      January 13, 2017 at 2:24 pm

      You heard! If Lami is a gossip, you are worse.

    • Ore

      January 13, 2017 at 9:44 pm

      You are the problem we women describe.. the lady is offering selfless advice and you are hear pulling her down saying “you heard”. That means you yourself are the gossip!!! Heal yourself. Because your comment doesn’t even relate?.. a happy person has no time for criticising. May God heal you of negativity and give you more productive work! Lami is right.. many of our mothers are guilty of this. I hope we women learn to build each other this way instead of tearing each other down.

  2. bliss

    January 13, 2017 at 12:46 pm

    lami am sure you’re speaking of yourself. I’ve heard some people say they can’t allow you in their click because you gossip in the guise of concern for someone.

    • Bade

      January 13, 2017 at 6:42 pm

      Nawaaaaaaaaaa oooohhh. Nigerianssss. Wetin consain garri with salad?

  3. Adebe

    January 13, 2017 at 1:33 pm

    This is as real as it gets..

  4. Babanie

    January 13, 2017 at 1:55 pm

    Oh stfu

    Women are architect of their own misfortune

    U kill enough men already so good for u

  5. tunmi

    January 13, 2017 at 2:49 pm

    Self care toh bad!!!!! ? ? ? ? ?

  6. Charidee

    January 13, 2017 at 4:44 pm

    so I watched this good morning show on Waptv and men were asked if they could let their wives go on a private vacation without them… majority of their answers were so disheartening.. In spite of this women really need to wake up… it’s more than make up, more than the smiles, you end up bitter, aggressive…. just a moment for yourself now and then won’t hurt. For the average Nigerian woman whose idea of traveling is going to the village when someone dies or is getting married… I think just leaving the house even if it’s for hours would work and absolutely enjoy that time.. with no guilt tripping

  7. Nicez

    January 13, 2017 at 8:01 pm

    Women take care of yourself I for one love the sound of this article. Do you, set boundaries and be responsible for your actions. I rather have a cheerful wife than a resentful one. I think women by nature tend to pay attention to the little details and worry more about things. I might be wrong though.

  8. Madam Jessy

    January 14, 2017 at 2:45 am

    I dont think women can have it all,we pretent we can have it all. Everyday we have to make a decission either we can be a mother, wife, a sister, care giver…….etc. I will advice women to train poeple around them to help, train people at work, train your family to help you balance day to day activities. Create a coping machanism to balance your work, family, relationships, and “life itself”. Staying home mothers are full time job, let alone women CEO’s, Women traders, women teachers, women doctors, women nurses, women presenters, lots and lots of women in their different careers and prof. I will really advice women to create a coping and individual machanism that will help them achieve a room for comfort and at the same role model to many and stop pretending to have it all……….. bc nobody have it all and we as women can have it all.

    • Lindt Lover

      January 14, 2017 at 9:14 am

      Train family, friends and workmates to help you all you can, but you also need to realize these are humans with lives to live, and guard against this sense of entitlement to other people’s time and care which I see constantly. Grandmas owes baby and i her life and all her free time, siblings ought to take care of baby and i during their free time and weekends, but husby is free to watch premire league matches all weekend. Eventually, no one owes you shit. Choices choices choices.

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