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act4_251A friend once told me I had become famous for my woes. My brothers had started teasing me. They said “Wana, can’t you find something else to write and talk about…Are you not tired of milking your very unfortunate childhood?” At this point I made a conscious decision to stop talking about domestic violence. Maybe it was time I stopped airing my dirty family laundry in public.

Then just a regular day at work, we received a text message. The message was from a listener who said she was pregnant still in her first trimester and her husband had just beaten her with a cable wire.

As we read out the text on air, my insides started to fill up with hot air – I was furious! Then we called her and she narrated the story to us live on the radio. As she spoke my head became a slideshow of familiar images. I tried so hard bottling up my pent-up frustration. But somehow it succeeded in getting the better of me. My boss watched as the tears fell in ferocious trickles down my face. Then he put the story forward to our listeners soliciting their contribution he added “Wana even shed a little tear there” in his jokey American accent. The woman became our radio moment case study for over a week. Numerous calls and text messages came through. With everyone having their own unique brand of counseling and therapy. We were inundated with advice from those who were friends of friends and of more friends of victims of domestic violence.

Amongst the responses received were

“I think she needs to stay in that house and get on her knees and pray”

“You know we women have sharp mouths on us so we don’t know what this woman did to upset or provoke her husband”

“It sounds like there is more to this story than she is telling us”

“Divorce is not an option, the bible is not in support of that. she needs to seek the counsel of the Lord and remember that this is a marriage. It is for better for worse”

At this point I wanted to tell these illiterate morons that till death truly do them path right, and we will all buy expensive lilies for her grave stone right? Of course the epitaph on her gravestone would read

“our dearly beloved sister, dedicated wife and mother who sat there while her beloved husband opened up cans of “WHOOP ASS” on her while she was pregnant. She was so dedicated to her vows she stayed till her ass was whooped to death. She will always remain an inspiration to all. Her suffering in silence was always commendable. Her patience, next to none and her commitment to culture was always admirable”

I eventually had to keep reiterating whilst struggling to appeal to my conservative listeners that this wasn’t about what she had or hadn’t done. It was about the fact that you don’t beat your animals with cable wires let alone a woman you marry and call the mother of your children. It was bad enough I had already been reprimanded at the office general meeting for being too “girl power” on the radio. So it was very important to not condemn or have an opinion on the subject.

The weird part was that most of these comments were made by women. But I had seen it before. My mother had been beaten for over ten years actually. We had prayed, burned celestial candles, been to the prayer retreats, anointed by prophets and exorcised from the demons of great grand parents past – and it didn’t change a thing!

No one ever said pack your things and come stay in my spare room. We stayed there and prayed while we incurred medical bills from our lives of domestic abuse. Still we were lucky because for some others they paid for caskets instead.

After that week on the radio, I realized domestic abuse in my childhood home will always haunt me because it wasn’t just about me. There were women in Louboutin shoes and Marc Jacob bags who covered their punch bag faces with MAC foundation used alpha-hydroxy acid to rid their skins of scar tissue.

The worst crimes against humanity are those that happen in your own homes. You know why, because home is the place every human being should feel most safe. I read once on an Adidas poster, “to be silent is to be a part of the problem”. I realise I might for the rest of my life embarrass my brothers because I will always talk and write about domestic abuse. So let me be known for my woes. The day that you shut me up is the day that I die.

If you are a victim of domestic abuse, please seek help. You can visit www.projectalertnig.org to get resources that can help guide you and protect you from your current situation

42 Comments

  1. Glory Edozien

    March 8, 2010 at 11:23 pm

    I am still not sure which crime is worse. The man who beat up his wife or those that ask what did she do. The ignorance and wickedness that pervades humanity is limitless and extremley disturbing!

  2. Darian

    March 8, 2010 at 11:53 pm

    The Bible also says a man is to love his wife as Christ loved the church. Last I checked, Christ died for the church, not beat her with a cable wire. A man who beats his wife is not being faithful to her, or to the lord in keeping his promise to love her like Christ did. She can leave him. If she still doesn’t want to leave him, she can live somewhere safe, apart from him. The Lord also did not say endure abuse in your marriage. No way! It’s time people started reading their bibles and thinking for themselves (not the abused woman – the women who are calling in saying silly things).

  3. Alakowe

    March 9, 2010 at 12:02 am

    By promoting our culture of silence and silly excuses, women are as much perpetrators in domestic, physical and sexual abuse as much as men. We can never have enough girl power, or what have you, we don’t even have enough as it is!

    Check out the hottest new literary website: web.me.com/alakowe. Now accepting submissions!

  4. pinksatin

    March 9, 2010 at 1:17 am

    Wana i can imagine the anger you felt while listening to that unfortunate victim cause i felt the same anger inside me as i read your article.Domestic Violence SHOULD NOT be tolerated. Its so annoying when people say women in this situation should go on their knees and pray that the husband will change, perhaps the husband would have landed them one blow before they even finish the prayer.I am not saying women in this situation should not pray but you have to act (James 2:14-17 What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food.If one of you says to him, “Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it not accompanied by action, is dead.)

    How can a man raise his hand against his other half, the mother of his kids? what kind of mentally deranged bulldog is that? i think the people that give useless advice like some of the ones you mentioned in your post, need to have their heads examined.

    My advice to the woman will be move out of the house and REPORT to him to his family members and hers as well…Maybe when he realizes that people know he is a wife beater and that the behavior wont be tolerated he will change…i dont even know sef.

    Personally, i think men that beat their wives are those who resent the women and regret that they married them.

    This issue just makes my blood hot.

  5. Temi

    March 9, 2010 at 1:19 am

    Thank you Wana for this deeply stirring piece. Unfortunately we have over many years allowed innocent women (as well as men and children) suffer in abusive homes in the name of the law. To all my fellow christian brethren, please be reminded that the only law you are under is the law of Love; God’s love (John 13:34). You are not under Mosaic law in its rigidity – except of course you’re a practising Jew. The law of love requires us to be compassionate to victims of abuse, to help them rather than ignore, condemn or worst of all, interprete the scriptures wrongly when referring to their situation. Next time you are tempted to judge an abused person, first ask yourself ‘what would Jesus do in this situation?’ Wana, God sees everything you and thousands others have been through and continue to go through. Stay true to yourself and your message and above all, know that complete healing from all the hurt will surely come. God loves you very much.

  6. Funmi

    March 9, 2010 at 3:06 am

    It is very true that women tend to be the perpetrators of the stupid idea that women are to blame for domestic violence. It is sad because it drives the ridiculous idea deeper and deeper into victims’ minds, further trapping them in the horrible situation. The more people speak out, the better for those whose lives are at risk.

  7. ProudlyNaija

    March 9, 2010 at 3:06 am

    This is such a wonderful article. It is nice to know someone out there has her ‘head screwed on right’. So many women make excuses for men he beat me ‘cos it was my fault, he cheated ‘cos I didn’t take good care of him and so on and so forth. It is such a shame that women give such blatantly outrageous advice. My aunt was in such a situation it was not physical but emotional and she lost all her self esteem was always sick in and out of hospital. She is dead now and I am 100% sure its her husbands fault! My candid opinion don’t stay a living dog is better than a dead lion better to leave the man alone and be alive than stay and end up 6 feet under!

  8. tbn

    March 9, 2010 at 3:33 am

    I love your piece, I was boiling in me when I was reading the advice by people, its just so traditional and I must say not a very sound advice, even pastors now tell women to get out of the marriage if their life is threatened. I was a victim of domestic abuse too, and I got the same advice which has made me stay on in the marriage till now. BUT! my solution was self-defence… The day i defended myself and hurt him, was the day I stopped getting ass whopped and that’s like over 6years ago. I’ve also been taking self defence classes, which has boosted my self confidence alot and I know that I have a right to defend myself and hurt anyone who tries to hurt me, be it my husband or a stranger. The fact is its either you or him. So either you leave the marriage, which is probably the best option for a pregnant woman or if you want to stay in the marriage, learn how to defend yourself!

  9. Dro

    March 9, 2010 at 4:53 am

    brilliant, advocating and solving.

  10. NYAZIVEA

    March 9, 2010 at 6:39 am

    Its so bad that other women would feel this way about the situation. It does not matter what caused the assault. The fact that he raised his hand to the women he claims he loves is just plain DISGUSTING.

    it is really not a time to point fingers, instead the mentality of our women has to change, starting with our younger girls. bECAUse a man marries you and pays some sort of bride price does not mean he owns you. If you are in any form of abusive relationship do no there there and pray and wait for things to get better because the physical abuses will just continue to escalate. If you also know people in a situation, this is not the time to ‘MIND YOUR BUSINESS” but instead help out in any way you can.

    Good job Wana, physical abuse should be spoken against (AWARENESS AWARENESS), by the masses. If these women are to leave these relationships they have to feel there is some sort of SUPPORT SYSTEM out there.

  11. anu

    March 9, 2010 at 8:14 am

    wana, i may not directly be a victim of domestic abuse,but indirectly i am.Growing up with a daily beaten mum was terrifying and the impact on we the kids still lives with us till date!Getting to forgive is a dily spiritual struggle just to say a few.
    My candid advice? shine your eye and don’t leave room for the slightest resemblance of battery!

  12. Bola #1

    March 9, 2010 at 8:19 am

    There is NOTHING the lady could have said or done that would warrant her getting beaten, NOTHING. If the guy is pissed, he should exit to cool off and not lay a finger on her.

    As per leaving a marriage, its funny cuz I was discussing this with my auntj ust yesterday.
    Should one stay and be beaten OR should one leave???

    As for those who say the Bible does not support divorce- that is false. The Bible has given caveats.

    Lastly, I’m still wondering what could have made Benny Hinn’s wife file for divorce? It’s a scary thought. Although he has stated that the seperation is not on biblical grounds, I mean what could have happened…

    GOD please help us all!

  13. adetollah

    March 9, 2010 at 8:55 am

    hi wana,i feel u,was listening to the show on that day and i was so surprised when that lady called to say that we dnt know if this woman had provoked her husband.
    Now tell me, what manner of lady is this, its so unfortunate that we women are our own enemies, so that is why I appluad you and other women standin up n refusing to shut up.
    I have joined the bandwagon, n will not shut up till this disease is eradicated…

  14. Anijawife

    March 9, 2010 at 9:08 am

    I guess it has to do with our culture.When your husband beats you and you reported him to your parent,they will tell you to endure and not to talk when he is talking as if he need that excuse to beat.Its just so sad when two people who are bounded by love turned their marriage into wrestling arena.
    Women,we need to start telling our boys that its wrong to beat girls whether they are their siblings or friends,make them realise they are to be proctected and not humiliated.
    We all need a sort of reorientation on this issue.

  15. vic

    March 9, 2010 at 9:39 am

    Hello Wana
    Thanks for that.Leave all these women that are always saying you have to stay “till death do you part”.Tell me does that mean till your husband beats you to death???
    If a man raises his hands to beat you… better leave his ass becos we have seen it happen time and time again…he begs,you forgive and later he feels the next time he can just beat you and beg maybe even add a few guilty gifts and you will fall like a pack of cards….
    And for men who say “too much girl power” they had better believe it..Girls have power.

  16. Deedee

    March 9, 2010 at 10:06 am

    I believe there are always signs before marriage. Unfortunately, due to the pressure society and family place on women to get married, they ignore such signs and ‘plod on’ into a marriage that is a disaster waiting to happen.
    Those who have daughters should start telling them from a very young age that they are valuable and an asset to any man because a woman who lack of self-esteem is very attractive to an abusive man.

  17. Ufuoma

    March 9, 2010 at 10:36 am

    Great idea to stand up for whats right,we all know these things happen but we rearly want to talk about it. I do remember my mum got beaten over and over again till she almost lost her sight. There is a particular scene still in my mind, of when i woke up in the middle of the night (still a kid then) and heard my mums screams’. The memory is still fresh and i always knew my mum was quite bitter a lot of times.As a kid i always wondered what made her so. Guess i never had the chance to find out as an adult cos i lost her when i was eight. Am a guy though,but i do not subscribe to violence of any sought. I think the battle belongs to the ladies though.

  18. duchess419

    March 9, 2010 at 10:42 am

    Painful and yet hard hitting home article. I strongly doubt if any one of us has NEVER felt, directly indirectly been part of this wife battery, but my God, the comments, whether she did or did not, who in his right minds warrants a beating from the very same person who is meant to protect you, marriage says for better or for worse yes, but with the love that God has for us, i doubt very much this is what he meant. So biko people, lets not turn things around to suit us. So would this foolish woman give the same advice to her daughter if the husband beats her up and disfigures her body and face, what an illeterate fool. I am so glad she is not my relation. A man once he raises his hand on you, will do it again and again till death does do you part and a God fearing man who respects himself and his wife, will never lay a hand on you, no matter whether you warrant that beating or not, MEN respect yourselves!!!

  19. ibinike

    March 9, 2010 at 11:12 am

    I have never been a victim of domestic violence, as my father never beat my mum and my husband has never even raised his voice at me before but I agree with you that the worst crimes are the ones committed in the homes by people who are known to us. Imagine assault, incest and other abuses. While I don’t support divorce as the solution, I believe that wife-beaters don’t just become that after the marriage. Most womenfolk who are victims have seen the signs while courting their man. Late Bimbo Odukoya said you cannot condemn what you have accepted. if my boyfriend slaps me, pushes me around or forces himself on me while dating him, I have no right to shout when I marry him and he beats me. Why wait after marriage to become a victim? I read somewhere on the internet that there is a disease now known as “battered women syndrome” – imagine that! Wana I will advise that you take your passion and advocacy further and educate young ladies on how to detect violent streaks in their dates and also signs to watch our for. I believe that will save us all from having to go through the pains, the tears, divorces or even death that results from domestic violence.

  20. Aibee

    March 9, 2010 at 12:10 pm

    Wana’
    I missed the show but wasn’t too suprised by the comments made by fellow women. After all isn’t it women who carry out torture on other women in the name of widow’s rites.
    On the God hates divorce scenario, my take on it is this- you get out of the house while you still have breadth left in you to do that. you don’t get divorced but you absolutely do not stay under the same roof with a man who beats you even while you are pregnant. You get out and you do your prayer and fasting from a safe place. Get out and take your children along with you.
    As women, I believe we should teach our sons and brothers that it is wrong to beat up a woman for whatever reason. Fighting a fellow man is considered barbaric even in Nigeria so why should beating up your wife be any different.
    On girl power, it might be hard but I guess as a presenter, you should try to maintain your neutrality especially on ‘touchy’ topics like this.
    God Bless You.

  21. Candyfloss

    March 9, 2010 at 12:29 pm

    Wana don’t ever stop fighting for what’s right no matter what people say highlighting Domestic Violence is right! Way to go!

  22. Emma

    March 9, 2010 at 12:36 pm

    hmmm, thanks Wana for addressing this issue. I used to talk about it myself and it started to seem like i was making my family (esp my father) look bad, so now i just talk about it in the 3rd person…i considered running away from home several times but i didn’t have the means…until an opportunity came and trust me, i grabbed it with both hands!
    the other day, my friend saw some scars on my arm (from the serious beating from my father), when he asked about it, i said i ran into a door, i told the lie so well, i almost started believing i actually ran into a door (crazy…i know!), altho’ i don’t think he believed me.
    in my experience, if a man as much as raises his voice, i go fear…lol. if i see any tendency of aggro, i go run. my ex displayed some road rage the other day, i never looked at him the same way again…cos that was just a tiny glimpse into his real person…my point is people, especially women should stop trying to explain or rationalize domestic violence, there’s no excuse for it. period

    *sorry for the long rant, my fingers have a mind of their own lol*

  23. roundrobin

    March 9, 2010 at 12:49 pm

    i totally support you Wana. i have had a little experience with domestic violence. my dad beat my mum for the stupidest reasons. everything is well now and although i think i have forgiven him, i still resent him in one part of my heart. i just pray that he doesn’t do it again and that i totally forgive him. about women who give excuses, all i can say is, i feel sorry for them and their children. we should not allow this anymore!! Lord help us all!!

  24. emeka

    March 9, 2010 at 1:04 pm

    i am a guy but i never understand why guys beat up their girlfriends let alone their wives.it really is an unmanly thing to do irrespective of d provocations.Ladies on their part should speak out whenever they are subjected to such inhumanity cos dats d only way to stop it

  25. T girl

    March 9, 2010 at 2:16 pm

    i can’t imagine a woman will ever open her mouth to say that is becos women have sharp mouths that is why a husband will rise his hands against his wife, my mother was a victim, she was being beaten by my dad almost every day, i am in my early thirties now, i was just 1 yr plus when my mother left my dad, when she couldn’t take it any more, people were telling her to stay becos of her children, I wonder if she wouldn’t have been dead by now if she had stayed then. Even if u asked him till today, he wont give u a concrete reason why he was beating her. So i dont see why somebody will be saying is becos the woman did one thing or the other, that’s why her husband is beating her.

  26. kay...

    March 9, 2010 at 3:25 pm

    its true we women r our gr8est enemies…cos i guess they just want u out of the way so there’ll be more men for them…good riddance! I thank God i’ve never been a victim of abuse n i dont wish it on my enemy, n its totally disgusting, so yes, I refuse to accept it as normal n be rest assured my friends would ‘ve a spare room if they ever needed one by God’s grace… Women pls wake up n stop thinking prayers alone will stop a lunatic u need to get out while u have life n tell ur story…my aunt didn’t get this chance, she’s in her grave n her dear husband whom she spent so much time praying 4 is remarried… pls people we beta wake up…

  27. Funmie

    March 9, 2010 at 3:58 pm

    I have a coworker that comes to work with a black eye at least once a week. She thinks she is doing a good job of covering up, but we all see it. I feel so sorry for her because she thinks she is in “love”
    I am doing my part, i am trying to get close to her, hoping and praying that one day, she would open up to me and that way i can get her d help that she needs without being judgemental.
    The women that made those ignorant comments up there are stupid and brain-washed. Religion (esp. christianity) does not mean stupidity. God is not a stupid God.

  28. survivor:-)

    March 9, 2010 at 9:29 pm

    i can relate 2 dis topic cos i’v bn dere, done dat n thankfully survived,my case is diff cos it was a guy i dated,not married to(glory to God) so callin it off was not a problem.

    it started as shoving me,pushing,slapping,belting,free boxing trials n ultimately almost running me over..*sighs*(na who send me??,…nobody o).

    it took a alot of trips to d hospital to open my eyes.look if i died dis idiot wud av moved on to d next chick…..more like victim,d same goes for any other victim out dere,save urself while u can,u can actually DIE from domestic violence n guess wot? HE WILL FIND ANOTHER WIFE!!

    speak out,get help FAST!

  29. miss b

    March 9, 2010 at 10:33 pm

    !The worst crimes against humanity are those that happen in your own homes. You know why, because home is the place every human being should feel most safe”
    Genius

  30. Cee!

    March 9, 2010 at 10:41 pm

    This is a very important topic, not just for the women but also for the men and for the children. There’s a study that shows that most children that see/experience domestic violence grow to become abusers themselves. While it’s horrible to subject women to beatings by any man, it has an indelible effect on the young children that are raised in such households. Sometimes these men are so sick, they act like maniacs that are hungry for their prey and until they leash out this violence they are restless. I used to think that divorce is a sin until I attended some divorce care classes. In actual fact it is a sin to allow any man created by God, just like you were created to turn you into a beast that is beaten even in the slightest form. Physical violence, bad as it may seem, is not the only form of domestic abuse that women are subjected to. Emotional and psychological abuses are equally destructive on the woman and child. It’s a sin to stay and get killed by any other human being… SO PLEASE GET OUT OF THAT ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP BEFORE YOU ARE DEAD. If you stay there and die, that man did not kill you; YOU COMMITTED SUICIDE and killed yourself and then those children you are using as the excuse to stay on in that relationship will be the ones to suffer and become house helps for the next woman that the man will marry even before your burial is concluded.

  31. Barbara Dresser

    March 10, 2010 at 2:05 am

    I have never been abused by my husband. He is a gentleman and kind and generous. All women deserve this. A man is suppose to love and cherish his wife as Christ loves the Church. The Bible teaches self defense. The Apostles were told to take their swords when going out to evangelize. Our laws allow for self defense. Our bodies are the temple of God and we should always take care of them! This means not allowing someone to beat us up. I hope and pray all the women reading this find the courage to leave a man who is harming them in this manner. It doesn’t mean you have to divorce them, just get out of their space! But God allowed Moses to allow divorce in cases of adultery and abondonment. God hates divorce but surely He does not expect a woman or children to endure beatings no matter what they may or may not have done.

  32. Toyin

    March 10, 2010 at 5:36 am

    This is such a depressing story. It really bothers me that women have that “you have to stay in the marriage” mentality when domestic violence or abuse of any sort is involved. I also will never understand why I man would raise his hand or an object to his wife- someone who he’s supposed to love and protect. May God keep such men away from us, our sisters and our daughters. Keep telling your story Wana.

  33. Ishy

    March 10, 2010 at 5:41 am

    What are these women treating their daughters? That it is okay for a man to beat you and you stay with him.. This is stupid and full of ignorance. I mean I have never experience any domestic violence, but with other people stories, one should be clever enough to say No and run away from DV.. Lord help us in 9ja… Amen!!!

  34. smallie

    March 10, 2010 at 3:10 pm

    I’m simply appalled at the typical reaction from nigerians when such tragic events occur. There is a serious problem with the societal expectation placed on women especially when it comes to marriage. I’m pretty sure that the vow for better for worse does not include “he beats you with a cable wire” and you must still stay in the marriage – what utter nonesense! Yes they should pray but they should be even smarter and know to flee such a situation because most times it ends in tragedy (death).

  35. WaleAdeniji

    March 10, 2010 at 3:18 pm

    Why do you people associate everything with naija? This writer never said anything about where the incident took place. When are we going to learn to appreciate the country we have? Pardon me if i’m wrong, but one can easily inteprete your ” Lord help us in 9ja” to mean that that is all we do over there. No, it is not. And that is not to conclude that it doesn’t happen either. Bashing one’s kids is bad not to even talk about a wife whatever the provocation could be. However,wife beating has nothing to do with race or colour. It happens everywhere. And whereever it is happening, what is bad is bad and it is condemnable in strong terms.

  36. Loveis not abuse

    March 10, 2010 at 8:52 pm

    I am a victim of domestic abuse, I just started a blog to help people like me and seek advice from women as well. I would like to help single women to know what sort of man to get married too bcos these abusers are sleek and cover up well in the dating time. Pls follow my blog: http://loveisnotabuse.blogspot.com

  37. Loveis not abuse

    March 10, 2010 at 9:12 pm

    I am a victim of abuse, and I just started a blog to address issues leading to abuse where we women can discuss on what type of men people should marry and effects of abuse on a woman. Pls follow my blog at http://loveisnotabuse.blogspot.com

  38. Mosun

    March 10, 2010 at 11:27 pm

    I never get it, ma friends mum died dat way. His dad beat her to death, and she protected him into d grave. It’s appalin, d things that d society deems acceptable for d Nigerian woman. IT IS WRONG, and d earlier we accept it, d better equiped we are to deal wif it. If it happens once, it’ld happen again, and it is unacceptable. Women r not object of someones emotional or physical whim. If a man needs some form of physical exertion, pick on smone ur size, U little Coward! Women need to be able to stand up for themselves, and refuse to be treated wif anyfn less than dignity. The more reason, why we must equip ourselves. Get a job, make some money, so, u’r not totally dependent. Those kids u’r tryna keep a home for, are more sad and traumatized, than happy. They’r better off without an abusive father. Next time he raises that fist, walk out the door.

  39. Nneka

    March 11, 2010 at 11:02 pm

    In as much as I totally support your vocal stand here, I worry about how your mother feels about you broadcasting HER personal story,something she (like many other women in her generation) guard, albeit shamefully. Food for thought. On the other hand, I wish many others would tap into your courage and stop taking crap from their abusive husbands and WIFES.

  40. vickky

    March 12, 2010 at 12:07 am

    SHAME ON THOSE WOMEN WHO FEEL ITS THE WOMANS FAULT FOR PROVOKING THE MAN TO BEAT HER!!! And when she gets beaten to death, we just know that the Tyson of a man will remarry and the cycle continues. No matter the provocation, a man shouldnt beat up his wife.
    Many men have wives with sharp tongues and still dont beat them up….. And they are still nigerians, same with that jerk.
    Please advise that lady to run for her life cuz once its started, the beating never stops. Electrical cable!!!!!!! Imagine that!!!!!

  41. Kris

    May 21, 2010 at 6:15 pm

    No excuse for domestic violence. Theres no reason good enaf to batter someone, Men, behave. All culprits must be punished. Women should stop shielding abusive husbands/boyfriends. Echo this!

  42. meme

    December 17, 2010 at 11:36 am

    i am a victim 2 i wish I have forum to air my experience. I have 3 kids how do i live and take care of them alone?

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