While I wrote my dissertation at school, my supervisor advised that I should see the process as a game. She said that I would have to play with words, authorities, and relevant quotations from textbooks and journals, to score good grades. Thankfully, I played this game right and passed. Soon after, I started to view every aspect of life as a game, which I have to play right to get what I want. Although I hate to fail, I have failed a couple of times but as soon as I do, I pick myself up, and start again with renewed determination.
Even though they say that the world currently has many more women in it than men, I believe that there is one man for every woman. Though it is possible to love more than one man in one’s lifetime, women only truly love once. This love is usually for a man whom I like to refer to as “the ONE”.
We make a lot of fuss about meeting this perfect ONE, and falling in love with him. However, women often find it difficult to determine what is right to do / acceptable behaviour when they finally meet him, especially at the very initial stage of the relationship where both parties are busy putting up a façade, trying to put forward their very best qualities – actively playing the game.
The dating game is the trickiest of all games. It often renders women confused and unsure of what to do with their newfound love. Comporting themselves in line with the rules of the game poses a challenge, especially in our society where men are expected to make all the first few moves, initiate conversations, and make most of the phone calls etc. Women find themselves at a loss. What happens when we feel like talking and he doesn’t call at that point? Would he feel discouraged if his phone calls are not regularly returned? Does he really want to do “the chase” alone? Can we in return make phone calls or send messages to him without being tagged as desperate, easy, or a little too eager? Is it okay to show eagerness?
Men say that 21st century women are arrogant and a little too self conceited but the truth is that single women are only cautious, careful, and afraid. No one wants to goof or be screwed over while playing the game. Since we want to win, we like to play it right.
Women want to be wooed, just as it was done in the past. Unfortunately, many 21st century men seem to be clueless about the age-long wooing process. This is the reason why women sometimes feel the need to “assist” men to accelerate “this process” but in the end, these women (mostly) goof.
I know that the game can be challenging for women who are naturally emotional… many of who do not know how to hide their feelings or pretend. As soon as they are in love, the whole world knows it! Unfortunately, this seems to be a major turn off for many men.
So, what is to be done with this game? Personally, I give credit to those who have played it right. As a way forward, I recommend that single women like me should ditch the game (at least when it comes to relationships) and come clean. Lets be honest with our-selves, apply common sense, and trust our instincts. When we feel the need to make that phone call / send that message / make the move, lets just do it.
What’s the worst that can happen?