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So Sweet! BN Reader Sandra’s Ode to her Fiance’s Mom – “14 Reasons Why I Love My Madre”



More often than not, we hear stories of horrible in-laws and monstrous mothers in-law. So it was indeed a breath of fresh air to read from a BN reader who thinks of nothing but the best of her fiance’s mother. Sandra  is a final year student of Human Resource Management in the US. Although her wedding is later on this year, she can’t wait to tell the world about the awesomeness of the mother who gave birth to her Boo. Sandra told us that a lot of people have said to her that she’s being pre-emptive in singing praises of her mother in-law. Her response to naysayers? “That is a lie. My MIL is God fearing and will never change”.

Sandra’s ode to her “Madre” is very cute and sweet. We hope you enjoy it and we look forward to reading more positive stories and experiences from our beloved readers.

Who would have thought that the day I gained my beau, I also gained myself an awesome new mom. Lucky right? I know. Some people have just one mom but I’m lucky and blessed to have two wonderful women to call ‘Mother’. I’m going to point out some of the reasons why I think my other mom is super. I call her Madre.

She loves me
You can only imagine how in love my Madre is with me. Sometimes I get embarrassed with how much she loves me. It’s amazing how many hours and sleepless nights she puts into praying for me.

She motivates my relationship
Oh yes, my Madre motivates me to not let her son go. She is so positive about us and it just keeps me going.

I feel comfortable around her
I feel like I can be myself around her without having to worry about being nervous…. you know, that feeling you get when it’s still new and you want to make a good impression? Well, sometimes in doing that, you miss out on letting your in-laws know the real you. Well my Madre makes me feel comfortable enough to be real all the time around her.

She is caring
Sometimes I actually think she cares too much. When I’m sick she pampers me like a baby, feeding me and being overly protective of me.

She likes to talk
My Madre can gist for Africa oh! There is never a dull moment with her, well except she is sick. Although she can tell you the same story three times. What can I do but listen?

She likes to listen
I love how she listens to me. It makes me know she pays attention to me.

She never leaves me wondering what she’s thinking
My Madre is very expressive. Whenever I need to know what is on her mind, I just ask and she opens up.

She loves the Lord
This has to be one of her biggest strengths. My Madre is a born again Christian who prays fervently, reads her bible and lives by example. Her prayer life is inspiring; she has totally dedicated her life to God and family ignoring every other thing.

She raised my husband and he’s a good man
How can I not love her for raising me the wonderful man I call my own? She did a good job with all her kids. She also taught him to cook which is cool.

She is the best Grandma
My Madre has one grandchild. With the way she treats him am convinced she will make the best Grandma my kids could ever wish for. I hope she doesn’t spoil them though.

She is kind
My Madre is a selfless woman. I think she feeds the whole village from her kitchen. Even when she has little she is willing to sacrifice.

She is emotional
My Madre has got to be the most fragile person emotionally – which I think is cute. She respects her kids so much like they are her husbands, which she actually says they are.

She never criticizes
I have never for once heard my Madre say something bad about me or criticize me.

She is a good cook
I always look forward to her meals. She cooks with dry meat, which I love. You better eat when she serves you food or you get in trouble.

My Madre is not perfect, who is? I still can’t imagine having a more loving and caring person as my mother in law I am truly blessed to have her in my life. I pray, hope and wish she lives forever to reap the fruit of her labor.


  1. Lani

    September 19, 2013 at 11:34 am

    It is well

    • Jo!

      September 19, 2013 at 11:47 am


  2. fola

    September 19, 2013 at 11:44 am

    HMMMM … im happy for you girl … but please marry first and then let’s have part 2 … it is well !!!

    • Hephzibah

      September 21, 2013 at 6:09 pm

      Well said Fola. You can never know the other side of pple till somtin happens. I pray dis love lasts cos dat was how mine started b/w my MIL n I. My hubby was so jealous dat he felt his mum’s attention was shifted to me. Whenevr she comes visiting especially during my pregnancy period and she sees me working, she will scold her son n tell him to do the house chores dat i was not strong for it. Everytin turned sour after d demise of my hubby n believe it or not its like a dream to me cos am yet to believe she could treat me dis way. I forgive her though. I just hope i can love and give attention to any MIL if i eventually get married by God’s grace

    • Shandi

      October 16, 2013 at 1:37 am

      Sorry to hear that. May God strengthen you and give you
      happiness again. Amen.

  3. Chu-Chu

    September 19, 2013 at 11:45 am

    Lmfao @ Lani…Nice words from the writer but it is really well..Happy married life though. 🙂

  4. lilz

    September 19, 2013 at 11:45 am


  5. Gistyinka Blog

    September 19, 2013 at 11:47 am


  6. Iyke

    September 19, 2013 at 11:57 am

    Nice Sandra. Go on and live for the love of the life you dare desire… Live for the passion of joy love of a mother brings…Live life with every breath and effort that matters…because it ultimately really does…matter.Your positive connection with your mother-in-law is an opportunity to grow and be better…happy with yourself and happy for the occasion to do better in life with others…Trust me Sandra,you are basting in the wet and sweat of your positive attitude…The tremendous weight of your lifted fears…The enormity of promise…”uncaged”…affirmed…Relieved…reassured…..
    Your marriage will stand the test of time.
    God bless.

    • sandy

      September 19, 2013 at 12:25 pm

      Thanks. Bless you too

  7. My Opinion

    September 19, 2013 at 12:09 pm

    So refreshing and encouraging to hear a DIL to be say so many nice things about her MIL to be. I must say we can’t have it all so over-looking each others weakness or correcting each other in a nice manner while dwelling/appreciating the strength of each other, will at the end create a good atmosphere for the relationship to grow better.

  8. My Opinion

    September 19, 2013 at 12:11 pm

    ” others’ “

  9. Modella

    September 19, 2013 at 12:14 pm

    Marry first and if you no fit born,then we go see the real colour…joking

  10. ty

    September 19, 2013 at 12:15 pm

    Oh my! i wont dampen the sweet mushy mushy affair with tell tales of MIL n DIL love gone very bitter and sour… but i am sooo looking forward to part 2 of this ‘ode’. MIL fiaka… moves on… All the best Sandra… btw, u two look alike

    • hateunrealisticpple

      September 28, 2013 at 6:22 pm

      Why is everyone talking like this!! I am married and I believe I have an amazing relationship with my inlaws. I introduce them as my mom and dad. I went into marriage with the mindset that she is my second mum and I accept her for all her weaknesses. We jist, argue, pray, disagree everything!!! so please some mom-in-laws are angels from heaven!

  11. It is welllllll

    September 19, 2013 at 12:16 pm

    Just as with one post about an Ini Edo interview where the first comment started with K and the rest of the comments went to kk, kkk, kkkk……. Me sef I will join this trend. It is well. This Ode reads very very very beige or is it vanilla? It is wellllll.

  12. X- Factor

    September 19, 2013 at 12:22 pm

    So cool…

  13. Mrs Chidukane

    September 19, 2013 at 12:22 pm

    Hahahahaha!Yes oh.May it be permanent in your Life my sister

    • sandy

      September 19, 2013 at 12:26 pm


  14. GreenDiamond

    September 19, 2013 at 12:30 pm

    AWWW dis is lovely wish u well and u r pretty lucky.. but i must say u shouldnt expect so much from people as they are human lyk u said no one is perfect and i once read here and never forgot ur mother in law will always luv her son more than she luvs u if any matter ever arise. but am very happy for u nd u ve a great energy!

  15. Vanessa

    September 19, 2013 at 12:33 pm

    this is the latest trend now; ….reasons why I love….Y’all watch out. I am coming up with 20 reasons why I love my Dog.

    • Lizzy

      September 20, 2013 at 8:05 am

      and why i love my laptop! LOOOL!

  16. Hurpeyeahmie

    September 19, 2013 at 12:42 pm

    I am happy for you my sister

  17. BUKKY

    September 19, 2013 at 12:44 pm

    If you don’t have it doesn’t mean someone else cant have it….Good luck lady!

  18. Funke

    September 19, 2013 at 12:51 pm

    I am very confused where is the ode to her own mother , why is she not singing her own mother’s praises like this ? How does her beau feel about his future mother in law

    • Bleed blue

      September 20, 2013 at 9:25 am

      I think an ode to one’s mother is a natural phenomenon. Our mothers (most of them) love us naturally and unconditionally.

      The fact that her mother-in-law is proving (so far) to break the cycle of bad relationships between daughters-in-law and their mothers-in-law is worthy of an ode.

      I have the most frightful mother-in-law, so I am in fact in awe of this relationship she describes. And may it be permanent for her by God’s grace.

  19. Busarni

    September 19, 2013 at 12:51 pm

    e get as e be ooh. Hmm

  20. Missy

    September 19, 2013 at 12:52 pm

    I pray it continues that way cos My MIL to be is exactly this way,same features no difference and I always pray she doesn’t change when we r married. My own MIL even comes to visit me at work and just wants to know how I’m faring,I pray it stays like that. It s really well

  21. Jayda

    September 19, 2013 at 12:55 pm

    Hmm, i knew i had to talk about my MIL once i read this story. I had the same experience before i married my husband and I thought well she’ll change; she never did! Even when i broke up with my husband ( then fiance) she called me every single day till we made up. She went to the extent of speaking to her kids (my husband’s elder siblings) to make peace. She never for once left me!
    Then we got married and i thought well, maybe the true colours will come out as they say, Never! She’s still the same caring mother who never leaves me, (am even ashamed to say i sometimes try to avoid her calls, because am not used to such lavish care and attention, even my mum and dad who stays in the US doesn’t call me that often). When i got married, we had no kids for the first 2 years, My people, come and see prayers o, sotee i begin fear. She would pray and fast and go to mountain for days on end praying for us to concieve. I had to ask my in-laws wives (she has all boys) and they confirmed she is unbelievable, that she is so selfless its almost unreal. She totally changed my mind about the popular yoruba MIL story and has been a real blessing to me o. Cant wait to give birth so she can be so happy and pamper me silly. ha, did i mention, she can cook for Africa! Sotee, if i go to her place and say am not hungry, na so so food i go pack home with questions like “dont you like the food” “should i cook something else for you” etc. I totally love her, and yes she has her faults ( She can so be on your case to make sure you do something, she will call you 20 times everyday to remind you), but hey who doesnt! Love u mama!

    Sorry for the story my people biko. lol

    • sandy

      September 19, 2013 at 1:23 pm

      Sounds exactly like her. Hahaha….yes even when we broke up, she did not stop loving me, she kept praying and calling me. Wish you well!

    • Mz Socially Awkward...

      September 19, 2013 at 1:29 pm

      Awww, I like your story. Your Mother-In-Law sounds like a genuinely nice woman without drama. Thank God for exceptions like her who destroy the stereotype.

    • AA

      September 19, 2013 at 2:12 pm

      Eya, God has blessed you with a good MIL. Be a good DIL to her in return

    • Kokogirl

      September 19, 2013 at 5:52 pm

      You are blessed my dear. Enjoy! I can only wish mine was half of yours.

    • Kokogirl

      September 19, 2013 at 5:56 pm

      @ JaydaYou are blessed my dear. Enjoy! I can only wish mine was half of yours.

    • larz

      September 23, 2013 at 3:45 pm

      I have a friend with similar experience. For someone with lots of family issues, I believe that her gift of a mother in law was a blessing from God for all she has been thru with her personal family. Last I checked, they are still going strong… Yes genuinely nice MIL are out there. I pray for one of those n for God to gimme patience and grace to appreciate n cherish it

  22. just thinking

    September 19, 2013 at 1:04 pm

    It seemed to me you were describing my MIL, she is absolutely lovely as well. Been married 4 years now and I have come to love her as my mama. She has her faults but tell me who hasnt. God bless all the good MIL…..

  23. temitope

    September 19, 2013 at 1:17 pm

    Hmmm!,its so refreshing seeing a DIL write Ǧ☺☺ϑ accolades about her MIL. Think,write&act positively&it’ll be so. HML in advance girl.

  24. Mexi

    September 19, 2013 at 1:35 pm

    Hmmm,I pray for such MIL…I wish u enuf my sister.

  25. 1 + The One

    September 19, 2013 at 1:35 pm

    My sister’s mother-in-law is very much like that too! So amazing it’s almost unreal. As a single girl, I used to be a bit afraid of what kind of ‘hands’ I will fall into when I got married as all I seemed to hear were stories of horror of MILs however my sis’ MIL (and reading good testimonies like this) has given me hope!
    I echo the prayers ‘God bless good Mothers-in-Law’ and even the not too good ones, may God change their hearts!

  26. OLA

    September 19, 2013 at 1:40 pm

    I love my mother-in-law to the core. When I started dating her son she showed me the type of person she is from the word go. I have been married to her son,for the past 31/2 years and I am so in love with her nature. She carries my fight for me with my boo. He since has noticed it that he is conscious not to get in our way. I am myself in her presence just as I am with my mum. I love my mother-in-law like I love my mum. I look forward to when she comes to visit because she cooks so well. I tell my boo, oya come let us order now mummy is around so that she can cook all we want oo. I never hesitate to lavish on her and I appreciate are grateful praises. She is so content with life that she shy’s away whenever we want to lavish on her. I am thankful that I am blessed with a mother-in-law that loves me and my gra-gra.
    Did I mention I have two mother-in-laws and they are awesome.
    Truly be yourself and your mother-in-law will love you just as you are. I do not try to impress because when you over try, you then start putting yourself in trouble.
    Ma belle mere est gentille, amoureuse, patiente et generouse.sympaticis.

    You will be a wife tomorrow and a mother-in-law to your children’s spouses. Say a good word out of your mouth and you shall leave to reap it. I sincerely prayed for a nice mother-in-law and I got triple what I prayed for. Thank you Jesus.

    • Kokogirl

      September 19, 2013 at 6:06 pm

      @ Ola its usually not about being yourself and trying hard to impress. Its all about the character of the MIL- some are not IT and some are ….just like you portray. You are blessed to have the MIL you have. Like you wrote, I equally always pray to be a blessing to my children’s spouses. Amen!

    • Newbie

      September 23, 2013 at 1:44 pm

      just wondering – how is it possible to have two mothers-in-law or do you have two husbands?

  27. precious

    September 19, 2013 at 1:40 pm

    just like my mom, she can even beat us stead of her daughter in-law, she’s always protecting her.

  28. Lucylink

    September 19, 2013 at 2:04 pm

    It’s so nice to hear these lovely testimonies about great mother-in-laws. I know that there are good ones out there!

  29. AA

    September 19, 2013 at 2:10 pm

    Babe, abeg marry first before you start writing odes to your mama-in-law. If story never change, then enh heeennnnnn, I go listen to you

  30. Bussy

    September 19, 2013 at 2:16 pm

    this sounds so much like my MIL. God bless her!!

  31. jcsgrl

    September 19, 2013 at 2:36 pm

    Wow it good to know MILs like this exist. You are truly blessed Sandy.

  32. Mariaah

    September 19, 2013 at 3:17 pm

    Aww cute story.. We all pray for good, kind hearted and Godfearing MILs. My GrandMa was that way with her DILs.. My mum too.. She treated her SILs like her sisters..

  33. chicadimples

    September 19, 2013 at 4:33 pm

    I love my MIL too, she is amazing!

    Lord am grateful!

  34. eniola

    September 19, 2013 at 5:03 pm

    For those criticizing Sandra for singing her MIL’s praise, don’t be sentimental nah, because from the stories you’ve heard or what you see around you they often change doesn’t mean hers will change.
    My ex bf’s mum was amazing, she was 100%, she would call to check up on me, called me ”omo mi to fine” and would pick me up to attend parties with her, hustle for food and souvenirs for me, give me money to go and spay, introduce me to everybody as her DIL, leaving her daughters at home, call me and end her calls with love u dear, that at first I used be reluctant to respond, if i didn’t, she would call back and say it again. When I broke up with her son (since Feb) she didn’t call and hasn’t called till tomorrow. I have promised her my wedding I.V by next year by God’s grace, as I’m sure she’ll get to hear about my wedding , since we are from the same place.
    My point is, people should move on, be happy for people around you and be more optimistic than pessimistic generally.

  35. IshallMarry2014-IJN

    September 19, 2013 at 6:49 pm

    onscreen Patience Ozorkwor character – abeg did you hear that. You need to go on a 30day course with this woman so she can teach you sha.

  36. darkchildlovethyhair

    September 19, 2013 at 7:21 pm

    Lovely inspiring piece.May your MIL continue to love you and vice versa.Nothing like good inlaws!

  37. omo

    September 19, 2013 at 8:05 pm

    I have been married into the most wonderful family for 13 yrs now and my MIL is still the way she always has been since day 1. I thank God everyday because I know its not that am the most prayerful or perfect person, but perhaps as the saying goes, God will not give you more than you can bear. She prays for me the w ay she prays for her children, of course there are a few times when I felt she would favor her daughter over me, but overall we never had any clashes or quarrels. She calls me and sends me text messages all the time. Even when she visits us, which is quite often (we live abroad and she stayed with us for a year on two occassions), we never had any friction. My point is be positive, and be the person you wish to see in others. Those who go into marriage looking for someone whose mum is dead should remember that there maybe a girl out there one day praying for you not to be alive so you can marry her son. I know its not easy, and like someone earlier said, if we leave room for people’s limitations and recognise that we are all human, there will be less problems. Understand that the MIL too is as afraid of you as you are of her coming into the marriage. She doesn’t know if you will restrict her access to her son. The way the relationship plays out too has a lot to do with the husband in the picture and sadly, not many men are wise or diplomatic enough to negotiate that minefield. Just pray and be hopeful!!

  38. i no send

    September 19, 2013 at 8:31 pm

    hmm i dey laugh o ….but yes there are good and Godly mothers in law out there..i pray to be one too

  39. Omalicha

    September 20, 2013 at 1:38 am

    BN, my 7 year old cousin wrote her first essay….should i send it in to u too since u are now posting every amaturish, basic, “obi is a boy…ada is a guy” typa essay.

    • Swerve

      September 23, 2013 at 2:05 pm


  40. hot mama

    September 20, 2013 at 1:44 am

    I have the best mother-in-law any one could ever dream her to death. She is my source of inspiration. I pray to be
    a better mother in-law to my two boys when and if they get married.
    Keep up the good work and don’t let it get into your head so much.
    Thanks for sharing and stay bless.

  41. tobee

    September 20, 2013 at 7:32 am

    Awesome testimonies al d way,my mother is a gr8 mother nd she is has bin a wonderful Mil to her Sil,I’m just confident dat I’m goin to ve a wonderful mil too,its somthim every one shd settle wth God nd ds isn’t even gender sensitive,it applies to both man nd seen men who are good husbands but were unfortunate to ve terrible Mil who stood nd prevented their marital a believer,I used to pray for good parent in law dat has had a genuine encounter wth Jesus cos I knw dats wia it stems from.the yorubas will say a good inlaw is even beta dan a bad husband.I pray God blesses us wth both.amen

  42. I wish

    September 20, 2013 at 7:44 am

    My ML started out this o. All caring, loving, bla bla bla!. She told me stories of her daughters marriages and how baaad the men treat them. Fast forward 2 years and all the stories she told me is same thing the son does to me AND GUESS WHAT??? Its OKAY!!!!
    I had promised to treat her just the way I treat my mum. But I eventually found out it was all a sham.
    Anyways, am doing just fine without her!

  43. Agidi_jollof

    September 20, 2013 at 8:42 am

    My older sister’s MIL is so nice it’s unbelievable. She translated her name from English to Igbo and is the only one that calls her Amara. My sis has never suffered in terms of househelp Wahala, as soon as she gives birth the woman will land and stay for 6 months and then send someone from the village When she goes back.
    There’s never a lack of garri in my sister’s house, she’d fry bags upon bags and send. God bless that woman abeg. There are really good MIL ‘s out there. I always pray for such.

  44. MCHG Suga

    September 20, 2013 at 4:41 pm

    ~MIL…..Whoa, such sweet words..Well, i’m of the opinion that there are very very who get to met MIL’s like hers, although its very possible sha, my mother in law too be is a very welcoming woman, but i cant vouch at least not yet..

    i wish you ( Sandra) a happy married life

  45. sissy

    September 20, 2013 at 11:11 pm

    ehmmm.this is a good praise to her MIL but on a cautious note babyisco should wait for like 5 yrs after the marriage to know her MIL is too early to say .anyways all the best in ur married life !

  46. favoured girl

    September 21, 2013 at 4:07 pm

    My mil is super because she lives in Nigeria and I live abroad! we hardly ever get to see so everybody respects every body!

  47. millionairess

    September 21, 2013 at 7:54 pm

    @ favoured girl best comment so far lolsssss. And to sandra i wish U all the best n i pray ur MIL maintains her AWESOMENESS. Best of luck

  48. Ok o

    September 22, 2013 at 3:22 am

    O girl,get in first and move to naija and come back and write on BN in next years.all the best

  49. Elizabeth1

    September 26, 2013 at 10:53 am

    hahahahaha MILs can change and strike as fast as thunder. Emmmmm You are definitely a new bee, just relax and see how she will change. HML o

  50. Deedee

    September 28, 2013 at 7:55 pm

    well, My mother in-law was very nice at first, well still a little nice if I can put it that way, but I have kept my distance & having few phone calls with her since she started defending her son even for some issues she didn’t know the full details even though her son admitting wrongdoing. My husband (soon to be ex) brought his friend into our house without telling me (well..we had an argument) and while the house was in a state. I mean our laundry spread on the airier in the living room, my college bag & books everywhere, parcel to be posted and boxes of cosmetics Avon) to be delivered etc. Long story short, his Mum ask what the problem was, and i explain few of our issues thinking she’s talk sense into her son’s head, but all what i got is the house is not dirty (how did she know that when she wasn’t even there?), well… On hearing that, I decided to keep mute now. I have also being label to be stubborn, while her son is the quiet one.

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