Connect with us


Ibidunni Damilola: The Complexity of Love



dreamstime_l_43705317The complexity of love is a bittersweet sensation we feel beneath our gut. It is the power we give another to hurt or love us.

In the blink of an eye, you witness yourself falling in love with someone who was once a complete stranger to you; in those moments, you begin to ask yourself questions you completely can’t answer. You need to understand that we don’t ask to fall in love with someone. We just do.

A friend of mine once told me she ‘liked being single.’ She claimed she was happy being alone, but what she failed to understand is that when you are in love, happiness is infinite. The happiness we feel alone is nothing compared to that which we would feel when we are in love.

We all dream of that person who would someday come our way and allow us witness the beauty of what life has to offer in terms of being love. Some find that person and bask in the adulation of the beauty they possess; others find that person and fear what they have found.

Some individuals say random things like, “He isn’t the wealthiest of men but I love him so much, because he makes me feel like I am the best thing that has ever happened to him. He shows me boundless love and care.”

Another set of individuals also say random things like, “He is very wealthy but he doesn’t show me he cares. He just spends and he is gone. No sign of affection or love.”

You will agree with me that both individuals are facing the complexities of love where one has little or none but contented while the other has almost everything but isn’t near contentment.

We all want to be loved by someone but the situations we sometimes find ourselves aren’t always favorable. The idea of being with someone who is “everything” we always wanted is the sole complexity of love; because the honest truth is that it is almost impossible to find such a person.
We unfortunately concoct such ideas in our minds. Don’t get me wrong, true love is real but it has its own blemish.

We avoid the complexities of love by forgetting the negativities and smiling at the positives. For instance, when a loved one of upsets us, the utterance “I am sorry” wouldn’t condescend any party. It will not belittle you in any way but show compassion and love. We can also avoid complexities in love by learning to find contentment in each other.

We must learn to accept people for who they are and also learn to either live with their flaws or ignore them.

Photo Credit: Dreamstime

Ibidunni Damilola views the world as a stage and everyday an adventure through which he explores his vast interests. He is intrigued by the cores of humanity and its complexity, which he reflects in his crafts. Follow him on IG @ibidunnidamilola and on Twitter @iamibidunni.


  1. Elvis

    March 6, 2016 at 5:14 pm

    Hmmmm….this thing called Love, it is indeed bittersweet and complicated.

    Above all, it is a wonderful euphoria, love conquers all and love eventually wins!

  2. ACE

    March 6, 2016 at 6:03 pm

    Issues of the heart!

  3. Marlvina

    March 6, 2016 at 7:31 pm

    Love is of God. If you have the fear of God in you, You will definitely find it easy to truly love another human wholeheartedly.

  4. Garrika

    March 6, 2016 at 7:40 pm

    The feeling of love is great! That feelings can empower you and make you do things you would never dream of doing. Love is bittersweet. I think I have only loved one person deeply all my life. I was dumped by the person though. Lol. Deep down my heart that person still holds a special position. I’m yet to find anyone else, I don’t just have that will power to invest in another person for the fear of being broken again

    • Oyinlola

      March 6, 2016 at 8:47 pm

      Awwww. I pray you find someone who’ll make you lose all your inhibitions and forget your fears.
      I’m single too but I know life is too short to keep holding back especially when the reason for our fears has moved on.

      Hoping love finds you soon… xxx

    • Tosin

      March 7, 2016 at 6:02 am

      i really love the comments.
      what is love? in my (copyrighted) definition, it is only and ever positive…

  5. Spunky

    March 6, 2016 at 10:02 pm

    Awwwww!!! Love please locate me Ooo…

  6. Rs

    March 6, 2016 at 10:04 pm

    ” crazy little thing called love “

  7. osaretin

    March 6, 2016 at 10:46 pm

    Love covers a multitude of sin.

  8. Suwa

    March 7, 2016 at 12:35 am

    Love love love!!! Please come find me…

  9. ElessarisElendil

    March 7, 2016 at 12:55 am

    ?????Love is a manufactured emotion sold you by decades of advertising and romance novels. There is only affection and camaraderie, everything extra nah packaging be that.

  10. Nekky

    March 7, 2016 at 11:48 am

    @ Garrika, I appreciate your post. you have to forgive yourself, stop feeling you are guilty for not being loved back? u can’t control your personal deep feelings sometimes not to talk of another! don’t give up on love, move on, love again & you will be loved right back , even deeper and genuinely. love is a beautiful feeling and don’t get it twisted!

  11. Retlaw Qut

    March 8, 2016 at 11:42 am

    Really nice.. Love is under bittersweet your choice of words really nice

  12. Olaniyan Mubarakah

    March 8, 2016 at 5:02 pm

    Ibidunni Damilola’s works are pieces of motivation to me. It’s a matter of fact that for you to find peace and happiness, you have to learn to accept things as they are and not try to change people

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.