Today, April 19th, 2018 is perhaps the happiest day of my life, and it isn’t because I recently got a raise at work or something related to money, neither is it because I got a surprise gift or anything of that sort. It is the happiest day of my life because my marriage to my sweetheart, Anike Iredapomolami clocked 6 months today.
Before you roll your eyes, wondering why I am so giddy when it isn’t even one year yet, here is why, the past six months have taught me to appreciate every second of my marriage.
Maybe a little background will help you better appreciate my view.
I was born about thirty years ago to a father who had nine wives, twenty three children, and cared less how either the wives or the children survived. This wasn’t because he didn’t have the means but solely because he just didn’t have the emotional capacity to care. He was also a misogynist of some sort. He never liked or appreciated women and their opinions. How he had a harem of girlfriends still beats me till date.
My father was the type to leave home first thing in the morning and come late at night and no one dared raise a brow. For so long a time, my siblings and I could hardly recognize him because we barely saw him. The only times we did were days he was ill, and on these days, my mother and the other eight wives would run head-over-heels tending to him, each one trying hard to buy his favor. This would continue till he got back on his feet, after which things would return to status quo, and we’d all have to wait for the cycle to repeat itself.
Needless to say, growing up was terrible. My mother who was supposed to be a sort of respite for my siblings and I, daily busied herself either fighting her co-wives or neighbors. Not once did I genuinely feel like I was a part of a family, and for a long time, the idea of ever growing up and needing to start one always scared me. I dreaded every idea of a relationship with the opposite sex and quickly cut off before it would move into a relationship.