“The choice is yours…Sit down and be ranting on Twitter” Actress Stella Damasus urges Women to Speak out about the #GEOBill

Stella Damasus - June 2014 - BellaNaija,com 01

Nollywood actress Stella Damasus is tired of the lackadaisical attitude of some women and in this post she is urging ALL women to do more than put posts on Twitter and Facebook and actively speak out.

See her post below.

I woke up this morning to a tweet from my sweet friend and sister Kate Henshaw. The Nigerian Senate had voted against the Gender & Equality Opportunity Bill. If you are reading this and you have no clue what what the bill is about, Google it and educate yourself before you continue this.

I was quick to respond to Kate, expressing my disgust at the action of the Senators elected into power, hoping they would make the right choices for the people who elected them to have a better nation.

Over the next hour, thousands of people started sending me tweets asking me to continue the fight and speak to the Senators and urging me to stay on the matter and all what not. One person said.. “You were very vocal in the #FreeEse campaign and we got results. Get involved now for results”.

I must say that I am humbled by these words but “I did not FREE ESE”, I only gave my voice to a cause to support a family that identified the fact that they had a problem and were willing to go to any length to get it solved. They needed the word to be out there and I supported. I did not have boots on ground personally to do anything, but they got up, they moved and to God’s glory we got results. My point is, Ese’s family did not start and stop their noise on Twitter and Facebook…they got up and moved! Also, a big thank you to people on ground who took physical action.

How does this apply to this issue of the Senators? Here we are again on Social Media screaming at the top of our voices (or with the speed of our fingers) seated in the comfort of our homes yelling at people who are flying around in private planes and don’t care about what in the world we are shouting about. The don’t feel any pressure because they don’t exist or live in the social media world where we spend our time fighting virtual battles. We are quick to come out and scream online but nobody wants to get up and be the scape goat.

A big shout out to my darling Kate Henshaw who has never been afraid to take anybody on, face to face or via social media as regards National and Social reformation issues . Much respect to you my sister. Where are the others who have the platform, status, fans, voice and the connections to pull global media and call these shameless men to order?

Oh! I’m sorry! Nowhere to be found right. This fight right here is not the place to showcase pictures of trips around the world, designer clothes & shoes, luxurious homes, academic achievements, awards, paparazzi, applause and self glorification so only the non-high fliers like Stella Damasus & Kate Henshaw should be sticking out their necks while others sit on the sidelines and sip on their bottles of champagne, watching the drama unfold. They look the other way because nobody wants to offend the senators that will probably be available to attend their events, premieres and launch of foundations; and possibly make huge donations.

I guess what people are doing is PICKING THEIR FIGHTS, which is a lesson I am learning these days.

A few years ago, I took Senator Yerima on about the Child Marriage issue and I was left alone to deal with the windfall of that episode. Some said I was seeking attention, others said I was jobless and was trying to get back in the good books of people. That didn’t stop me. When the Chibok girls were kidnapped, I called out our First Lady at that time, asking questions about the funds allocated by the US government to fight terrorism! It was reported by some media houses in Africa that the US government was paying me to stir up propaganda. No problem! I spoke publicly FOR MY COUNTRY but I suffered silently and bore the consequences alone.

When my property in Abuja got burnt, what did the media say – IT WAS ALL MADE UP!

Why on earth should I keep sticking my neck out when the women in the country we call our nation are not interested in getting their hands dirty and doing the work. All the big female stars and politicians are cruising in big cars and living in their big houses, fully aware that this bill has no effect on them whatsoever so why should they bother about sticking out their necks. Their kids wont be given way as young brides. They own the homes they live in so no in-law is coming to drag it with them if anything wrong happens to their husbands. They are not waiting to inherit anything from their husbands because they are well sorted out, so how on earth does this affect them? Does this bill add more items in their walk-in closets? I guess Nigerian women are not ready to get up and take a stand so why should a couple of us just break our necks over an issue that we as NIGERIAN WOMEN are not ready to FIGHT & STAND FOR?

Mothers, sisters, daughters, actresses, singers, market women, female bankers, female politicians and every other woman reading this; the choice is yours. Sit down and be ranting on Twitter. Pour out your vexation on Facebook. Thats where it will end. When the markets are closed. When the banks stay shut. When the schools stay closed. When the men don’t get the loving at night! When the WOMEN GO ON STRIKE, maybe the men will be forced to do what must be done.

Liberia did not get liberated through Twitter and Facebook. The women stood up and took a stand.

I live in America with my children and I can guarantee you that this bill, passed or not, will have no effect on me directly in any way shape or form but the truth is, when we all choose to turn away, What kind of country are we leaving for the generation coming behind?

Whats the point in all of this. I live in America and I am still speaking up. What happened to all the big shots living in Nigeria who have the voices and are LOOKING THE OTHER WAY?

Lest I forget, it is very important that I say this…. SHAME ON THE SENATORS WHO VOTED AGAINST THIS BILL.

81 Comments on “The choice is yours…Sit down and be ranting on Twitter” Actress Stella Damasus urges Women to Speak out about the #GEOBill
  • Californiabawlar March 15, 2016 at 9:33 pm

    With Stella, I have thrown the baby out with the bath water…so NOPE, I’m not reading & refuse to be inspired…maybe it’s my loss, maybe it’s not. ????

    • With “Californiabawlar”, March 15, 2016 at 10:28 pm

      With “Californiabawlar”, I have thrown the baby out with the bath water…so NOPE, I’m not reading & refuse to be inspired…maybe it’s my loss, maybe it’s not. ???? See I made it personal.

      • Californiabawlar March 16, 2016 at 12:44 am

        you made it personal? Hmmmn…oh, like it now applies to you as a person? But you used ny moniker….sweetheart the dimness of your attempt at wit is so underwhelming?

    • Wisdom March 15, 2016 at 10:33 pm

      And that’s how you stay ignorant.

      • Californiabawlar March 15, 2016 at 11:19 pm

        Ignant is whats I is ?

    • keke driver March 16, 2016 at 8:42 am

      Babe you’re ignorant, PLS stay that way , OK?

  • Mr. Egghead March 15, 2016 at 9:45 pm

    What do you want them to do? March? Hold Rallies?
    When majority of the populace is plagued by a lack of bread, how do expect them to fight “first-world” problems like ‘equality?’ Any form of mass action that does not contribute to an increase of money in pockets is dead on arrival.
    BBOG became famous because of its political backing. It is not easy to bring Nigerians under the hot sun, day after day, protesting for some girls that they have not seen or heard of. Somebody has to provide money for meatpie and Fanta. Now that the political foundation has weakened (mission achieved?), you can see how the movement is beginning the slow slide into extinction.
    The rich in Nigeria don’t care, their female children will never be disenfranchised.
    The middle-class care a little. they tweet about it and use hashtags, but they are too busy working 8am – 5pm, Igando to VI everyday to do any rally
    The poor just don’t care because they are hungry.

    Madam “I-live-in-America” should be glad we are protesting on twitter. At least voices are being heard.

    • Rakiya March 15, 2016 at 10:42 pm

      Call her Madam I live in America but she does live in America LEGALLY so the Nigerian situation will not affect her directly. Will it affect the family she left behind? It depends, if they fall into the category of people that are wealthy enough then they will also be fine. Nigerians are so EFFING LAID BACK & SELFISH!! EVERYONE THINKING ABOUT LACING THEIR OWN POCKETS. IT’S ALL MICRO AND NOT MACRO. I’VE NEVER SEEN A PEOPLE MORE SELFISH IN MY LIFE!!

      And then someone comes to talk about it, you’re saying No, Nigerians should not march or hold rallies because of the hot sun. SUN is your excuse. Rosa Parks did not think about the flogging of her life she could have received. The people that marched in Selma, how many of them did you see with umbrella? Mandela spent endless years in jail but NO Nigerians!! Twitter Fingers!!

      I’m flying business class, #Godisgood. I signed an endorsement deal #Godisgood, I’m collaborating with a US artist, #Godisgreat. See my mummy’s Hermes collection, #Godisawesome, #AbiKDGiveaway #StyleMeAfrica, you speak English, Yoruba and French, your middle name is Florence. THINGS THAT HAVE NO LASTING EFFECT!! I’m just done!

      p.s: Your name says it all.

      • aries March 17, 2016 at 11:09 am

        Nigerians have refused to evolve , even animals do!!! most women are even happy to be treated as livestock… and in the end, they quote the bible or quran and every one remains silent

    • Sanmi March 15, 2016 at 10:44 pm

      Those same people doing Igando to VI will have a rethink when the real suffering starts. continue to keep quiet about the light situation, dollar rate and fuel scarcity. Like a frog they’re boiling by the time you realize the heat is too much, it will be too late.

    • cookie March 16, 2016 at 3:27 am

      Lol, your comment is the truth. the lower class cant care less, they are hungry and tired. The upper class cant care less, they are not affected. The middle class? They’re selfish and unbothered, they go wherever the wind blows.

      Though I love Stella- she is one of the few intelligent and thoughtful ones in Nollywood and her anger is valid, – the thing is, many Nigerians are really too hungry to care. Even the actresses she is calling cannot read and understand so called bill. All they know is their runs and their designers. But I wish they use their platform for a greater good cos they are influential and have large followership. If I tweet from now till forever, nobody knows me

      Nigeria’s first problem is still hunger. We still lack basic needs – food, water, shelter… is it bill that will be our priority?? For real?? It’s countries like USA that talk policies

    • Somtoo March 16, 2016 at 11:10 am

      hohohohoohoho @ fanta and meatpie. Dude, you are hilarious. But let’s be real. How do people get up and act when faced with hunger you ask? The hunger should propel them to hold those rallies and speak up! .

      Reports of public lynches, jungle justice, public beatings are on the rise bcos pple chose to vent their frustration on other citizens. Blaming so called perpetrators of evil for the ills afflicting nigeria. Rather than lynching supposed criminals and beating up fellow citizens, they should direct the energy towards rallying against our corrupt politicians

      Believe me, Nigerians are not that hungry. They have energy. Unfortunately, its misdirected energy!

    • “changing moniker” March 16, 2016 at 12:39 pm

      i mistakenly liked this…pls give me back my like.

    • Xrys March 17, 2016 at 9:48 am

      Oga… Everything u cited was quiet on point…. But Don’t use that tone “Madam, I live in America” ….it is disunity in tone like this that just make us each other’s enemies on the battlefront where we should be fighting a common thief (these animals called politicians) unified, Oga, unified… Mscheeeeewwwww… Kai

  • Engoz March 15, 2016 at 9:52 pm

    You know I ask myself the same question, I don’t live in Nigeria, even if I were in Nigeria, I have the resources and intellect to defend myself, I don’t come from a family where we would be struggling for inheritance or any of those nonsense, but I still get angry and want to do something right about the position of females in our society. Why do I bother when it is not of any reward to me? Some of us just have the moral intelligence to empathize with others. You know empathy is not many a Nigerian forte. Until Nigerians see blood will they empathize. Stella the foot soldiers of these barbaric trait will soon come trying to sway the conversation to your personal life.

    You are absolutely right on how nonchalant Nigerian women have become. I don’t know how a society that boasts of Funmi Kuti who in 1949, led a female protest against the Alake of Egbaland, which subsequently led to his abdication has now become so docile and entirely useless towards female affairs.

    • Amalonye March 15, 2016 at 10:34 pm

      “Some of us just have the moral intellegence to empathize with others” Rubbish statement. Clearly you don’t live in Nigeria as you rightly stated, so please SHUT UP and go to bed. It’s so funny how it’s most of y’all living in another man’s country that are busy clamouring and wailing. Come to Nigeria and see what it’s like! Talking crap about Funmi Kuti or whatever. Do you know it’s difficult to just breathe in Nigeria? Oh you won’t, I almost forgot, you’re actually not in Nigeria.

      Saying we’ve become docile, like you were ever part of the non docile regime. You guys in diaspora need to come back to Nig and live in Nig for more than 6months,then you would know why Nigerians lack the “moral IQ to empathize”, something you obviously have in abundance. Would you leave your job that pays you nothing and drive through traffic every day to go and camp at the senate house for gender equality? A law that would most likely not be enforced even if it is passed. Do you think poor people in Nigeria care about this crap? Do you think the rich give a hoot about gender equality? After all Alakija, Deziani and Okonjo didn’t need the law to make billions. The middle class is too busy hustling to either become rich or not to become poor.

      Women on BN amaze me! Most of you climb on your moral and liberal high horse mostly for laudatory satisfaction and accolades. How good would the bill do when young girls are still being forced into early marriages or would the bill stop that too? You think Nigerians have time to waste pining over non survival rights like you guys do in diaspora when their personal survival and well being is hanging by a thread? Your comment is so upsetting. Same with Aunty Stella. Please dear human rights activitist, come back to Nigeria and set your tent outside senate house. Social media is the most viable outlet and somehow it would get to the government. How many Nigerians even have data? BN women from, always feeling like they are made from a special cloth the average Nigerian woman is not made from. Feeling themselves with their pseudo feminists ideologies and their liberal/progressive blueprint for the nation they’re not in and won’t be coming back to in a long time, while forgetting to analyse the facts and critically evaluate the situation. Always thinking one size fits all. Please come back and help us stand outside the hot sun and protest. I would give you cardboard and white marker boards for free. Hey! I’m all for equality but your comment about Nigerian women being docile, apathetic and lacking empathy is before the facts certainly not facts.

      • Thatgidigirl March 15, 2016 at 10:51 pm

        Phew amalonye thank you!!! Some BN commenters need to understand that many a syllable does not an intelligent man make. “Moral intelligence to empathise….”????

      • Nahum March 15, 2016 at 11:13 pm

        So….you could not make your point without insulting and being aggressive. It amazes me how people like you come here and make such sweeping generalizations of the BN commenters. Do you know us? Do you know how we live? What we do? You sound bitter as hell!!! You don’t have to visit this blog and read our comments if we irritate you so much. We don’t make comments for your approval so go kick rocks!!! Yes, I replied you with the same aggressive tone.

      • TeeS March 15, 2016 at 11:16 pm

        She doesn’t live in Nigeria, I don’t live in Nigeria. Many of us do not live in Nigeria and tbh this does not affect us n anyway because we are in a country(US) that has their shit together. Just because we do not live in Nigeria does not mean we do not care about her well being and we do not want her to prosper. So stop his hate on us who live abroad.
        Granted y’all feel the pain more than we do because we aren’t there , but since the ones that live in naija are not doing anything about it , should we all just take a sit and let the country go to waste!!!
        For the Love of the God that I serve, it is 2016, women’s right should be a thing that doesn’t need to be voted on, it isn’t rocket science. But obviously in Nigeria , it is impossible to understand basic common things.
        Growling on social media isn’t going to solve the problem, women who are in high places and have a voice, Bella naija , Linda Ikeji , politicians wives , the wives and children of the idiots , Vp and presidents wives and daughters, actresses , OAPs, y’all better come together and fix this shit! You have that position and voice for a reason. Use it!
        When was the last time I heard anything good come out of this country ?
        It is well!
        Stella has spoken well

      • Engoz March 15, 2016 at 11:19 pm

        I am so excited my comments on the lack of moral intelligence on how to empathize with issues that don’t affect you totally murdered your core and have revealed how stupid the average Nigerian woman can be. Oya Cry once more cos I’ve added stupid to describe you lot other than lacking empathy. You have the effrontery to ask me how good will the law be to the issue of child marriage, etc because of already existing laws? Is it not the need to avoid clear conflicts and vagueness that this bill was submitted to the senate? Is it not the vagueness of these laws that have led to manipulation by certain pedophilic persons in the senate, hence the need to amend them which is well within the legalities of the law. for your information where there is no crime, there is no law. Thankfully we don’t have you in the senate, thankfully The senate president is not dense as you all are and the bill will be reintroduced. Rubbish!!!!!!!!

      • Californiabawlar March 16, 2016 at 12:22 am

        Oh chile!!! Calm dem tittaysss!! Calm dem down. Everybody and they mama now got something against women on BN… I take it a bunch of us babes now trade our feminine parts in before typing Bellanaija.com into our device. Else if ya pumpum still dey there…you’d also be a ‘women on BN’, no?
        A lot of people on BN live in Nigeria, and even as a naija babe in diaspora, the only American issues that is my ‘concerns’ is immigration….every fibre of my being is Nigerian and worries about every Nigerian issue.
        “Pinning over non-survival issues “? Oh rellly? Non survival bi ti bo? I grew up with my mum as a state appointed issuer of estates. My eyes have seen what women go through…as long as you have a penis in naija you’ve got more rights…one of my mums infamous cases involved a druggie son! Her own son o! She almost ended up on the streets…tell me how that’s non survival…
        You’re deceiving yourself if you say women’s rights issues are only important to the esoteric high horse-climbing intellectual BN Martian women….
        No, I don’t agree with saying Nigerian women residing in Nigeria are docile but to dismiss another persons input based on your perceived notion of their location and lifestyle is straightup wack! Now a person with enough sense to type such a well constructed albeit logically faulty and rage-ridden comment shouldn’t be referred to as wack???

        On another note: I think lots of people are bothered by the commodore and intelligence shown by the regulars on this site, and are now keen on hushing folk by making them feel bad about dey lives…nope it’s not going to fly! Irrespective of your location…leave as much comment as your data would allow and just let others be!
        I was late to the single naija girl party but mehn! the comments on there shows that there are player hating ghosts just lurking everywhere in the shadows….and boy! Did they come out to play on that fateful day… I laughed so hard at all the ‘BN commenters are so fake comments”…not sure if it was that funny or because I was drunk outta my mind…all I know is KO LE TOYEN (it ain’t that deep)….

      • Dtruth March 16, 2016 at 3:25 am

        @Amalonye….pls are u single? I get this feeling I can’t explain when I encounter an intelligient woman from Nigeria who can have meaningful and thought provocating conversations….I need to know you as my friend oh nne…You make sense die….God bless u…..

      • Rike March 16, 2016 at 9:02 am

        Dear Amalonye You’ve said it all God bless you #kisses&Hug

      • Engoz March 16, 2016 at 10:43 am

        Correction* When there is no law, there is no crime.

        It seems the word docility is paining all of you. Docile means ready to accept control or instruction; submissive. lmao!!!!! I thought you all love to be submissive, quoting the bible here and there. Una no wan do submission again??? wetin happen? Is that not what the Nigerian female aims to become? Is it now a surprise that when it comes to social issues the Nigerian female is voiceless, extremely useless and retrogressively slow in mental thinking?

      • Tunmi March 16, 2016 at 3:46 pm

        “BN women from, always feeling like they are made from a special cloth the average Nigerian woman is not made from. Feeling themselves with their pseudo feminists ideologies and their liberal/progressive blueprint for the nation they’re not in and won’t be coming back to in a long time, while forgetting to analyse the facts and critically evaluate the situation.”

        This part make me laugh. Bruhhh, this is on some personal level ish. I just can’t deal. Have you seen the class system inside Naija??? ? ? ? ?

      • Femi March 16, 2016 at 4:27 pm

        Lord have mercy, you truthfully ripped the entire article into shreds. You have my respect!!

      • Debbie Ade March 16, 2016 at 6:13 pm

        I don’t live in Nigeria but your comment is life!! It’s so easy for people in diaspora to sit on their high horses and point fingers or give tons of advice. If d matter dey pain you like that, move back home and help out with all the peaceful demonstrations and senate house marches. I desire to see a better Nigeria but talk is cheap. Action, Stella!!!!

      • molarah March 18, 2016 at 8:21 pm

        Lady (or Gentleman) – you, and the 281 folks that liked your comments, are one confused bunch. As in, I’m so sorry for you guys. The country is going nowhere fast with the kind of attitude you just embodied in your post. I refuse to deal. You are exactly who Stella Damasus is referring to in her post.

    • Cyn March 16, 2016 at 8:29 am

      Its easier to live outside of Nigeria and judge the people here as docile. Stella, who is all the in the US and pretty much has nothing to lose, still got BACKLASH. You can the only imagine what will happen to someone here in Nigeria who is also struggling with all the nation’s issues. As much as this bill is important, we need to go step by step and stop shifting our attention with these crazy moves by the govt. LIGHT. WATER. ROADS. HOSPITALS. EDUCATION. Can we focus on these things for now PLEASE……… If the ‘Average Nigerian Women’ were as educated as you lot in the ‘abroad’ are, we wouldn’t be having this argument on docile or not. If the men were as exposed and well read, they wouldn’t treat us as inferiors. EDUCATION. LIGHT. ROAD. WATER. HOSPITALS first please.

      • Engoz March 16, 2016 at 10:59 am

        Spare me the educated part, I had most of my education in Nigeria but understood my basic rights as a human being. At 17 I went by myself (nobody in my family knew) to NEPA to challenge them on why we don’t have light. The Officials were amazed that a small girl came to the office and they promised to give us light. That is the kind of person I am. Stella like myself our foundation is Nigerian. The spirit of knowing that it is your right to live as a human being did not come from ‘education from the West.’

        Also that is what the senate is for… To address ALL issues affecting Nigeria. We can as well make the faulty argument that since we have laws on electricity, water we shouldn’t discuss them at the senate.

      • Cyn March 16, 2016 at 12:59 pm

        Please @Engoz you cannot classify yourself as an average or common Nigerian. How many average Nigerian teenagers know that they can go to NEPA to inquire about the light situation? Or spend money on transport to Nepa Office, money that will buy fuel? You obviously have exposed and educated parents to be that ‘ kind of person’. A lot of people don’t have that. So I cant spare you the education part, a lot of people have no idea what their basic human rights are. The level of ignorance is that bad.

  • chichi March 15, 2016 at 10:08 pm

    I’m in a ranting mood for this cause but I’ll keep it short, As she said all the social media outrage ends on social media. To be honest I don’t live in Nigeria but when I read this on LIB the first thing I thought was no one will care. I don’t know if its just me, but woman seem to have no faith about fighting for woman’s rights in Nigeria, honestly I don’t know what I can do from outside, I’ll sign a petition if need be and spread the word on social media, but do Nigerian woman in Nigeria care or do you think its just a waste of time fighting in such a cause? Anyway one true observation she made is about the celebrities (woman) they have nothing to gain or loose if they speak up or not, but funnily enough its their voices that can really make a difference because this affects our future and its incredible that that its even an issue. their voices will make people at least have a thought about this, mean and woman. When you take away the small percentage of celebrities that represent us to the world, what we are left with are these problems that affect the rest of us, including all my family back home. nawao to the first commentator on this subject, that’s the best you can say? Might as well not have botherd

    • Californiabawlar March 15, 2016 at 11:41 pm

      Well maybe because I’m smarter than wasting time and energy writing a 10 page thesis comment on social media beneath an article posted on social media about the inefficacy of social media activism….it would be adding to the redundancy of the whole scenario now, wouldn’t it?

      • Chi2 March 16, 2016 at 7:45 am

        Adding your comments together, you are almost there. I guess you aren’t so smart after all….

      • D March 16, 2016 at 4:38 pm

        @Californiabawler, I expect a witty, inelligent, ‘educated’ come-back for this (yawn), but my perception of you just went from up there *hands high above my head* to down there *hands below my knee*

      • californiabawlar March 16, 2016 at 9:43 pm

        No I’m not….I”M IGNORANT. Do I have to yell it from a rooftop for everyone to get?!
        What shall I do with myself now that I’ve fallen from grace? Linda Ikeji comment section here I come!

    • miini March 16, 2016 at 8:20 am

      I think the generalization that the average Nigerian woman is silly and docile is actually quite uncalled for and detracts from ur point. It actually makes u come across as sitting on a high horse and snooting down on these less intelligent and morally deficient women. why we can’t make a point without coming off as such?? That is what leads to this generalization abt BN women. As much as we keep saying social media aint enuff, it works and any Nigerian government will be very unwise to ignore the power it has these days. It actually feels somehow when pple in d diaspora just talk without empathy. Ur point just gets lost in d midst of u sounding so judgemental. I doubt that y’all know how hard it is for a lot of women in ds country. The ignorance and poverty is real. I do agree however that the more privileged ones should stand up and lend a voice to this cause. That I definitely agree with.

    • californiabawlar March 16, 2016 at 9:37 pm

      Hi up o…down low o! I donkiaa kadahodi!…lols.

      Well…if you had any sense, you wouldn’t go around putting anonymous folk on pedestals…and now expect them to be bothered by it? hehehehe…fafafa foul.

      Anyways as una no fit comprehend…I refuse to add to whatever Stella had/has to say on the topic…if e reach for your body, you’ll find a lake and jump in it…let nature take it’s course.

  • j’suis belle March 15, 2016 at 10:12 pm

    oya come and lead us to a strike we are waiting

  • Spunky March 15, 2016 at 10:13 pm

    How insightful! A lot of young ladies bother more about who wears who or what, gossip articles, music/movies…it goes on. Trust me on this, I bet a lot of ladies have of what you are on about or the effect of the bill not being passed. Dem no just send. That said, preach on sister…preach it!

  • NaijaPikin March 15, 2016 at 10:28 pm

    She is contradicting herself so much.

    Praising herself and Kate Henshaw for using social media to drive awareness, but then criticizing others by saying social media is not enough.

    At the end of the day, anyone who is bringing awareness to an issue should be commended. Social media oh, marching to senate building, speaking on NTA news, discussing in the market, gisting about it in the office. all na awareness with the hopes of achieving the same goal. Change.

    Lots have been accomplished through social media, This platform should not be downplayed

    • Nonye March 16, 2016 at 9:40 am

      Please read again. She didn’t just use the social media (SM). She actually called the wife of the President. Did you see that part?
      Her not being in Nigeria means she cannot be physically present to lead a protest. We in Nigeria here should be doing so. Those abroad can only use SM but that is clearly not enough.

  • Lulu March 15, 2016 at 11:35 pm

    I always tune her out, she talks too much. Gosh

  • PD Young Billionaire March 16, 2016 at 12:20 am

    May be ladies who discuss relationship/guys issues endlessly on vlogs should focus more on gender equality related topics.It will be more value adding than discussing ‘how to know you are a side chic’….lol.

  • Tee March 16, 2016 at 12:48 am

    As Stella no dey, I bet Kate Henshaw can take the lead. Oyaa, we dey your back like ‘ike’ hunch back. Aunty Kate what do you have to say?

  • fleur March 16, 2016 at 2:29 am

    seems like a great writeup. Unfortunately my deliverables today wont spare me the time to review.

  • Marian March 16, 2016 at 3:12 am

    You have to live in Nigeria to actually understand the struggle of an average Nigerian. There are people with no access to electricity and cell phone towers. These people don’t have cell phones, TV, newspaper, social media so all these talk of passing bill literally does not concern them Cuzco they are not even aware of it.

    My aunt can be considered your average Nigerian woman. She leaves the house by 5am and doesn’t get back home till after 10pm. Her commute from home to work is actually less than an hour but because of traffic leaving the house later than 5am means getting to work late. She’s still expected to make dinner and get the kids ready for school the next day.
    I resent anyone calling her stupid because she’s not going to camp out somewhere to protest. Saturday is her only day off that’s if she’s not called in to work. Calling out of work is definitely out of the question.

    The largest protest I’ve seen in naija was probably the bring back our girls. Where are the girls?

    The system here is flawed. It will take more than a protest to change things.

    • Nonye March 16, 2016 at 9:46 am

      Well, I empathize with your aunt and many other women struggling to eke a living. But the truth is, if we don’t push for our rights, who will?
      We should look beyond this and ask questions like “who is my representative in the NAS”, in my LCDA? And put pressure on them.
      You see, this GEO bill is important because we will have female children who may be discriminated at some point. And before you say “which one konsain me or no be my portion”, remember that some of the things you enjoy now are as a result of some other persons struggles years ago.

  • shade March 16, 2016 at 7:43 am

    What women equality, we better not be listening to these over sabi women who can’t stay in husban house, jumping from bed to bed and come and pretend they are good in t media.

    People like these over sabi have destroyed the family system, destroyed the mind of our young girls. The bill we need is women protection, we a not equal with men, but we can get protection laws.

    Identifying we are not equal with men help us know what our role and duty are. Don’t listen to these women who can keep a home, blaming the men not knowing their life style is wrong.

    Which traditional ruler in Nigeria will allow equality? The senators consult with them before voting

    • Aleesha March 16, 2016 at 3:46 pm

      Sister Shade,
      I suppose it is the word ‘equality’ that bothers you.

      However, this bill is recommending among other things, that:
      – women do not marry before their eighteenth birthday
      – Marriage can only hold between two people who have freely and willingly given their consent
      – Every marriage must be registered in accordance with national laws (this is to checkmate polygamy I think).
      It also covers issues such as the universal access to education, protection pertinent issues.

      I am sure that you would agree that child marriages, forced marriages, and situations where a woman is impoverished by her inlaws because her husband is dead, does not benefit anybody, least of all women.
      I am also sure you would agree that every girl has the right to education, and that women were not placed on this earth solely to birth children and do domestic chores.

      This issues which informed this bill, are way beyond the dynamics of individual marriages, especially where ‘headship’ of the home and submission issues are concerned.

  • Tolu Aluko March 16, 2016 at 8:26 am

    as far as im concerned madam aboderin you just ranted….so we ‘re all guilty to this whole rants…
    About the bill not be approved It just happened and you shouldn’t come to a final conclusion that all we gonna do is rant on social media and less I forget a whole of stuffs has being achieved thru dis same social media you stylishly condemned…
    And to our dear leaders I just think they feel threatened with this whole bill….but whether the bill is accepted or not women are beginning to wisen up ireespective of culture and religion….all we need is to keep making our own awareness to hell with their approval

  • Tolu4show March 16, 2016 at 8:26 am

    My own is that , who are the people now living in Nigeria cos almost all the people that have previously commented don’t live in Nigeria.
    I live at Ikotun??

    • tee March 16, 2016 at 12:02 pm

      Hi Tolu4show! Awon ti (former) area mi!
      I live in Nigeria (Abuja).

  • Cyn March 16, 2016 at 8:30 am

    Its easier to live outside of Nigeria and judge the people here as docile. Stella, who is all the in the US and pretty much has nothing to lose, still got BACKLASH. You can the only imagine what will happen to someone here in Nigeria who is also struggling with all the nation’s issues. As much as this bill is important, we need to go step by step and stop shifting our attention with these crazy moves by the govt. LIGHT. WATER. ROADS. HOSPITALS. EDUCATION. Can we focus on these things for now PLEASE……… If the ‘Average Nigerian Women’ were as educated as you lot in the ‘abroad’ are, we wouldn’t be having this argument on docile or not. If the men were as exposed and well read, they wouldn’t treat us as inferiors. EDUCATION. LIGHT. ROAD. WATER. HOSPITALS first please.

  • uncensored March 16, 2016 at 8:52 am

    Nigeria is definately going to be great one way or the other. Inasmuch as califoniabawler’s first response was my disposition at first, I had second thoughts. The longest protest in Naija has been BBOG but the largest with result was the fuel subsidy saga and not until we have a unified problem that will affect all and sundry, we ain’t ready to talk women’s rights.
    Celebrities and the likes whose voice could influence polls aren’t affected in anyway so I won’t blame them much, who hangs their own palava and carries another person’s matter for head? I had imagined 1dollar to #1000 case scenario, it would have been a worthwhile protest even if it’s not entirely the govt’s fault but no one would have been able to afford and we’ll do anything to put things right.
    I am a BN lady and definately not what you described up there, make comments without hasty generalization next time shogbo
    Let’s win the fight over accountability of public office holders first, women don’t even want to dwell in messy spaces sef

  • Fred March 16, 2016 at 8:55 am

    See this one that went to America yesterday is looking for gender quality even in marriage. Tomorrow you start quoting bible. The rudeness in her alone shows that you can’t make the mistake of even allowing such nonsense in the Nigerian constitution because it will be abused by a lot of Nigerian women like her. No-one is stopping you from being equal with your husband at home if you want, thats your business. America’s divorce rate will not be introduced in Nigeria.

  • Blessed March 16, 2016 at 9:13 am

    Stella! I understand you perfectly, but you sound so aggressive. You live in America that is why u can talk like this, do you know what we are going through here? If you don’t know Google the problem of common Nigerians and educate yourself!

  • naijafemaledoctor March 16, 2016 at 9:20 am

    Well well, let me speak from the angle of a Nigerian woman who used to be in diaspora but is now working in Nigeria as a doctor. Do I care about this bill, and did I even bother to read what it entails? NO! Let me tell you why; all I am thinking of is how to survive and my daily too. My December salary will be paid in June, and January salary, maybe September. Somehow I have to eat, go to work and pretend to care about the patients (ok, I do care about them….)…no electricity where I live for 2years now so we have to fuel the generator, meanwhile fuel scarcity everywhere, there are unpaid school fees and what have you. Hey! This is me who works for the government o…what of the many people who have no jobs? Or whose jobs pay a token and yet are still being owed? I feel Nigeria needs to get some basic things right like electricity roads, security,,,,,i mean, things that will first make women, and everybody at that feel like they have HUMAN RIGHTS,,,,when we’ve got that locked down, we can now talk about WOMAN RIGHTS. ……..and oh! Like most laws and bills in Nigeria, no one will honour or respect this bill too….no be this naija we dey?

    • Nany March 16, 2016 at 9:49 am

      My December salary will be paid in June, and January salary, maybe September. Huh?? Are you for real? Na by force to be doctor? Maybe you are in the wrong profession..lol! Can’t deal mehn

      • Dr. N March 16, 2016 at 12:42 pm

        She is not in d wrong profession O! Ask d gov who said doctors are inpatriotic for expecting to be paid. Can’t u see she is one of d few patriotic ones.
        So God bless u doc.

  • Josephine March 16, 2016 at 9:47 am

    Stella is so complex. Very noble in theory but could also be accused of trampling on another woman’s rights. The same thing she’s condemning so it takes away from her argument.

  • It is even better sef March 16, 2016 at 10:03 am

    It is even better sef.

    Make dem pass the law so that all these things will happen

    1. No more taking girls out. You take men out as well
    2. No more men paying bills, you share the bills
    3. No more “his money is our money, my money is my money”
    4. No more husband paying school fees, she pays as well
    5. No more men marrying women, women should marry men
    6. No more men paying dowry, women should pay men’s dowry
    7. No more men taking care of the family, women should bear the burden
    8. No more men marrying women, men choose to stay on their own cos of the clauses in that bill
    9. Highly and unprecedented rise in female singleness, spinsterhood, resulting into churches being filled up, pastors making money, herbalist making money of their head
    10. No more preferential treatment for women like “be the gentleman” “ladies first” . To enter molue bus, all must struggle to enter. It will become who gets their first and who has the upper hand.
    11. Lack of faithfullness and trust since in the bill, the women can keep their properties. Men too will share what they want to share and keep the remaining to themselves not disclosing all to their partners
    12. Breakdown in the marriage institution, resulting to increase in prostitution as men no longer marry but satisfy their desires outside without commitment to marriage.
    13. High rate of baby mama- single parenthood as the single girls will get themselves pregant via insemination or buying sperm from the bank
    14. High rate of crime due to high number of kids raised by single parent, with no guardian and father figure resulting to them misbehaving and becoming rogues and touts
    15. All these resulting to a fall in the societal values and loss of morals
    16. These kids will get guns and shoot anyone at will and we become like the american society.

    Congrats y’all!

    • Me March 16, 2016 at 12:34 pm

      And who told you women don’t Bear equal or more ( in some cases) of these financial burden you mentioned ??? Please get your facts right

      • It is even better sef March 16, 2016 at 12:47 pm

        what percentage? because you are feeding your husband you come and blab here?
        Even you that you feed your husband, you still expect free things from other men and your bosses.

        stay on your lane o
        Dont come for me cos i no come for you

      • Mz Socially Awkward… March 16, 2016 at 1:05 pm

        Nwa nne m… you really and truly shouldn’t have bothered with any response.

        In this life (and particularly when it comes to activities on this forum), it is always better when one refrains from engaging with the absolutely inane.

      • Me March 16, 2016 at 3:04 pm

        Yawnnnn*** ODE !!!pls come at me with something better,go and provide for your wife like real men do,so that other men can stop “enjoying” your wife oo I’m only helping you lmaoo.

    • Dr. N March 16, 2016 at 12:44 pm

      You need to read d bill
      It doesnt challenge marriage

      • It is even better sef March 16, 2016 at 1:28 pm

        Doc, oh you mean you want to take a side of equality and not all?
        You are joking
        You cant eat your cake and still have it.
        How wont it affect marriage? tell me
        FYI, i have read the bill, stop acting like a don
        That is the resultant effect up there

    • ErrmNotReally March 16, 2016 at 1:47 pm

      But this is the status quo in Nigeria!

    • Me March 16, 2016 at 2:10 pm

      Eya it’s not my fault that your wife enjoys favours from other men because you cannot meet up to your expectations .it can pain o pele

      • Me March 16, 2016 at 2:11 pm

        For “it’s even better sef”

      • It is even better sef March 16, 2016 at 2:38 pm

        Me, how would you know this if that is not your portion in your matrimonial home
        You dont need to whine here, yo can simply divorce him and go find your level
        It is shown in your first comment that you pay the bills
        You have used your husbands head and jazzed him
        yet you expect favours from other men
        sleeping with them all cos of the favours
        slut oshi
        it cant last long

  • Chu March 16, 2016 at 12:12 pm

    Wow, women are angry. Why don’t we channel this anger towards getting results rather than at each other? At first I did not understand the need for the bill but now that I know that a lot of laws are unclear on some certain things and can be manipulated, I see the need for the bill..
    We say social media has a voice and that’s right, why can’t Bella naija, lib sdk and others actually write an article give suggestions and ask for input on how to make things better. Women just like to fight each other and that is why men also lord it over us, they go to a beer joint and settles their issues and make plans while we just make noise. Can someone state the specifics of the bill, ask females to contribute ideas, create a master mind of some sort.
    If we can’t address on the issues can we start with one, to me girl child marriage is abhorrent and should be a criminal offence, lets start from somewhere. I will be happy to contribute in whichever way I can.. It does not always mean going to picket the assembly building, times have evolved, some things can be done virtually.
    I think the blogs especially bella which has primarily a female audience should rise up and do something about, I do not go to any celebrity’s Instagram to read what they say but I come to Bella everyday, I’m more likely influenced by Bella than they.
    Please women, rise up and fight for your right, our generation demands it of us, our children demand it of us.

  • chinny March 16, 2016 at 12:16 pm

    So where’s Mr. Ben Bruce and what does he have to say about this? Does this make common sense because he’s all about making common sense.

    • Md March 16, 2016 at 2:15 pm

      Why do you women always need other men to fight your battles, why can’t you fight your own battles

  • Dr. N March 16, 2016 at 12:43 pm


  • “changing moniker” March 16, 2016 at 12:47 pm

    I don’t like this pic of her…the weave is quite disturbing.

  • Marian March 16, 2016 at 2:03 pm

    So,let’s say this bill was actually passed. What exactly would have changed in reality? Children can’t go to school in so many parts of Nigeria Cuz there is no school. Underground abortion is still on the rise. You see a girl who looks to be about 15 married with 2 kids already only problem is you can’t even prove it Cuz she’s not sure of her age. I’m not sure people realize the number of uneducated people living in Nigeria. I’ve been to a village where the first primary schools there was just built. How do you tell these people about equality? Local government rep is for the most part a decorated title in my opinion. If someone can tell me the Lagos Ibadan road can still look like that in 2016, would have denied it years ago. The system has failed and it needs to be fixed first. I remember when I was little and my mom used to carry me to rallies to protest MKO’S imprisonment. What has changed? The system stopped working. Has the first lady said anything about this bill? Does she even believe in equality? Does the president himself support equality? Does your average Nigerian man support equality? Nah! A woman’s place is in the kitchen afterall

  • Tunmi March 16, 2016 at 3:44 pm

    I guess it’s open season on BN female commenter. It’s truly funny. Okay, let’s blame lack of data. Newspapers and radio nko? I get that the #1 focus is survival but the fuel subsidy protest happened. We can say that was directly linked to survival, as in you felt in in your pockets. So is this bill, in the long run. Nigerians surprised everyone and their ancestors with the fuel subsidy protest. Why are we keeping mum here? Is this on the radio ?? It’ll be something different from blaming women from being raped

  • Sherri March 16, 2016 at 6:15 pm

    @it is even better sef
    olodo ni e jor!
    I would tell you how gender equality benefits the society as a whole and eases the perceived “burden” of being the provider off the males, but I doubt you have the mental capacity to understand it.

  • orji uchechukwu March 17, 2016 at 10:07 am

    the sooner we understand that in Nigeria,culture, traditions and religion is the law,the better we would understand it. Until we change and the rule of law becomes deeply ingrained in our system,we shall make laws and laws but we will never be made.
    For example,this bill even if passed will merely be mere multiplicity of the law. Section 42 of the Constitution of the Federal republic of Nigeria(which is the grund norm) already States that every citizen has a right not to be deprived or discriminated on grounds of sex. That presupposes equality.
    But what do we are in this country? the various religions and traditions have effectively succeeded in making women second class citizens even in their own country. So its not about making more laws and passing more bills,it’s about implementing the laws that we have and totally erasing the totally backward distasteful culture of female gender discrimination that we as a country have developed…shikena

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