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FRIDAY TRACK: “…How Was Ur Night?”

BellaNaija.com

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Yes, we know its Thursday but here is a special ‘extra’ edition of the Friday Track.
Another brand new one will be published tomorrow on schedule
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TRM_LogoKilon Sparkles!

It seems like the grammar bullets are firing serious rounds at me this morning. As I walked into the office in my usual chirpy mode, someone goes to me “…Good Morning, how was your night?”

I had to continue faking the funk and pretend like that bullet didn’t just take out the entire front set of molars and premolars. I literally doubled my steps to escape into the trench that is my office before sighing heavily. I mean, how else could my night be? Errr….it consisted of sitting in traffic, eating late and sleep late.

Seriously how does one respond to that question? What could I possibly respond with, “FINE?!” Actually bin that, responding with ‘Fine’ would be a cop out so you will never get that out of me, it’s just too easy.

Perhaps,”…it was full of ghost…”

What night exactly are we referring to, the night pre-or-post sleep, OK, if it were pre-sleep then, I watched Mad Men and played Super Mario Bros on Wii.

You may not understand why this has got me puzzled but it’s the second time I’ve been asked that question in a month, and you know I am not a rude guy so I’d like to be prepared for the next time I hear it. And believe me, someone will ask me the same question possibly tomorrow morning after tonight’s intended bar-crawl.

The first time was as I checked out of an Akure hotel. After a bliss night sleep in a hotel room with blue blubs, as I handed over my room key to the receptionist (not quite a concierge), she softly goes to me “How was ur night?” I wanted to respond “It was dark,”, or perhaps “…noisy thanks to the scratchy speakers of your Faji bar”

So I started thinking perhaps it is me that have a problem with the question, in that case, let’s imagine the responses of other people & professionals.

Professional 1 – Prostitute: “How was your night?”, “Well, I borrowed a married man for the night, it was quite sloppy”

Professional 2 – Bus conductor: “How was your night?”, “I don break bottle finish…”

Professional 3 – Landlord, “How was your night?”, “Half of my duplex tenants dey sleep for free…”

Professional 4 – Female bank clerk, “How was your night?” My husband ate suya for dinner.

Between “How was your night?” and “…I’m on phone”, will I ever expand my vocabulary in this office? Sigh.

This week’s Friday Track is Beyonce’s Why don’t you love me.

Enjoy!

22 Comments

  1. teablinks

    May 27, 2010 at 7:01 pm

    hoooooooooo

  2. Iya2

    May 27, 2010 at 8:14 pm

    You are a trip!!

  3. kemi

    May 27, 2010 at 8:40 pm

    Bobo, I love you & I think u r so funny. Bt seriously, this dint quite cut it. If u r going 2put out a special thursday edition, let it b special! It was like u jst wrote it bebe so ur editor cud get on ur neck.

  4. Bola 1

    May 27, 2010 at 10:09 pm

    lol @blue bulb

  5. Temilayo

    May 27, 2010 at 10:29 pm

    seriously, if u find out how to answer that question pls let me know, it irritates the hell out of me, as in what does it mean? firts time someone asked me i was worried that maybe they saw what i got up to at night? between tthat and ‘he/she is not on seat’ i dont know which is worse!

  6. Lina

    May 28, 2010 at 12:38 am

    Lol @ kemi’s bebe muhahahaha….
    yeay its you that has a problem with the question “how was your night”

  7. D.O.T.M.H.

    May 28, 2010 at 3:53 am

    Lol, but seriously I think I say, infact I KNOW I say I’m on the phone. wot exactly is the proper thing to say?? and about “how was ur night” it’s almost like saying how are you (I think) it’s not all the time you are fine but the standard reply is “fine.” would u prefer “did u sleep well?”

  8. Akinjide Ojo

    May 28, 2010 at 8:08 am

    hello everybody, HOW WAS UR NITE??? 😉

  9. Tee

    May 28, 2010 at 8:39 am

    LOL.
    I despise that question. Always leaves me wondering whether I should give an honest answer just for laughs.
    Lol @ “He/She is not on seat” and “I’m on phone”…I’ve learnt to ignore though.
    We should just make Nigerian English an official language and call it a day.

  10. Faith

    May 28, 2010 at 8:41 am

    I get asked that question every morning when i walk into the office. It is so bleeding annoying, i could kill someone.

  11. Aibee

    May 28, 2010 at 12:06 pm

    Okay peeps. Could someone please post the correct term to use when a colleague is absent and her phone rings besides saying ‘She’s not on seat’? I sya that all the time and would really like to know the right phrase to use.

    As for how was ur nite, I usually answer fine though I ask ‘did/hope you slept well?’

    Also is it right to say ‘He/She is making a call instead of he is on phone? I often use them interchangeably.

  12. Olojugba of Jugba Town

    May 28, 2010 at 12:21 pm

    If your colleague is not at his desk, he/she’s not at his desk. He’s not on seat is just wrong.

    How was your night…I have no words Lol

    If pesin dey phone, dem dey phone. ‘He’s on the phone at the moment, can I take a message’ will do just fine. He’s on phone? My days!

  13. viv

    May 28, 2010 at 2:00 pm

    Not on seat i soooo wrong, @ olojugba you’re right, he/she is not at his desk is
    appropriate.
    how was your night… wonder if they truly want to know how my night was. it’s
    irritating.
    i didnt think there was anything wrong with ‘he’s on the phone’ till i read this.
    people enlighten me.

  14. gbekun

    May 28, 2010 at 5:33 pm

    some people here are confused. what the author of this article is trying to point out is the absence of the definite article, “the”, when some people say “he is on phone”. “he is not on seat” is considered wrong because the pronoun “his” is missing. in essence, the correct phrases should be “he is on THE phone” and “he is not on HIS seat”.

  15. Omo urhobo

    May 29, 2010 at 7:39 am

    I also think the author was trying to see how many of us would notice all his errors in this write -up. Read through carefully and you’ll see them…..at the end of the day though, English isn’t my language. I’d have more of a problem if my yoruba or urhobo was terrible. I had to get a yoruba bible when I found my yoruba was going down hill…..O se o Jesu, mo ti n so yoruba daada ni si n yi..

  16. Pam

    May 31, 2010 at 2:13 pm

    lol…I think everyone that goes to work gets asked that question. The receptionist at work always asked me that questiin every morning and i always answered fine because i dont think any other answer is appropriate. There are soo many other bullets as you call it, he’s not on seat, my names are, can i be on to ………..they all crack me up.

  17. winneR

    June 1, 2010 at 3:18 pm

    Please people,what’s wrong with “How was your night”?
    It sounds wrong,but what exactly is wrong with it?
    Wats d correct grammer?

  18. Copina

    June 11, 2010 at 5:53 pm

    I hate that question too, “how was your night?” Why the heck do you want to
    know? Thats usually the response in my head.
    It is such an invasive and pointless greeting.

  19. Gam

    June 11, 2010 at 7:00 pm

    I don’t like small talk. period.

  20. Molicious

    June 19, 2010 at 12:02 am

    Lwkmd, this is hilarious, I love it!…
    @ winneR, I don’t think the statement is grammatically wrong but who knows, I could be wrong. I think it’s the “night” that throws ppl off. It’s different if you ask “how did you sleep last night” but when you say “how was your night”, what exactly you are referring to, I’m not sure but that’s what I think is wrong with the statement

  21. longsufferer

    September 2, 2010 at 10:55 am

    hate that question? the first time I was asked..i was like ermmhhh….fine ..”iguess”….thinking inmy head what they needed that info for…before i realised it is menat to be a greeting. @ Molicious:even with ‘how did u sleep’…what business is it of anyone especially strangers!!!

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