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FRIDAY TRACK: The hardest part of the business is minding your own



Kilon Sparkles!

I was fast asleep Sunday night…so deep in sleep that you could say I was making music with my Primark bed linen. On the average night, I would toss and turn for hours – part because I’m a night owl and part because my skin doesn’t gel well with cheap cotton but not tonight, I was out like a light dreaming of sleeping on Egyptian cotton which even Martha Stewart would approve of. You could say I saw the sun, the moon, the mountains and the rivers like the brothers from AZ Yet.

On nights like these, very little can wake me or break me from my sweet slumber, not even a private call from Tom Ford to pick up that dream tux. The one singular thing which can raise me at this point is the smell of gist.

Sigh…ah gist! The one pastime that guarantees an elevation from a foul mood to that place where oxycontin users claim it takes them. We all crave it, we look for it, we find it, and then we feed on it and distribute it.

Back to Sunday night, its 2 o’clock in the morning, my phone rings. Initially I ignore it but after the third ring I sensed something was up so I picked up and although I was incoherent at first, the moment I heard the ‘punch line’ I was as alive as can be. Could you blame me? My source was calling from the United States so I couldn’t say let’s speak it the morning, I mean c’mon; a true gist monger never postpones a date with destiny. And luckily, it was a true blockbuster!

That’s the thing with Gossip .a.k.a. gbeborun a.k.a. don ahlah a.k.a. adidok, it is impatient and cruel. Gossip is unsympathetic, boastful, proud and rude. It demands its own way. It is irritable, and it keeps record of being wronged. It rejoices about injustice but frowns whenever the truth wins out.

Now the scary part of receiving new gist is the weird overpowering feeling which comes over you. You feel in charge, in control of information (which is neither yours nor none of ‘yours’) and despite the fact that it will be irrelevant in practically a few hours, you are the superhero for now.

That’s another thing about gossip, no matter how hot the gist is and how scandalous or controversial you think it is, you can be assured that some other story will surpass its ‘potency’ in a couple of days.

From the start of this year alone, there have been so many ‘breaking news’/ ‘exclusives’ about that person who had an affair with a domestic staff to this person who just checked-in into the Kaduna rehab, to society weddings that end after 6-weeks to rosary beads carriers who dabble in prostitution and coke binges. I don’t know about you but I put my hands up for remixing and mastering some of these ‘tracks’ and voluntarily sending them to local ‘DJs’ for airplay.

Why? I can’t say I have cracked the reasons behind my or other’s longing for other people’s shortcomings, I haven’t really tried to dissect what parts of myself likes to feed off other’s mistakes or faults; perhaps it’s because I too I’m imperfect and full of unprofessed failings….perhaps it’s because it makes me feel better to know that other people too are infallible. Have you ever asked yourself the same question(s)?

It’s funny because you’d think I’d know better from witnessing first-hand what it’s like to be a child of hardworking parents who were members of every social club that existed and watched how the entire club destroyed their confidence with their veranda chitchat when things got tough and they couldn’t renew their membership.

You and I know damn well nothing good comes from gist carrying besides its initial 2 minutes gratification. Plus you’d think as we are all educated, we’d be too ashamed to utter the inevitable parting phrase whenever you distribute a lil’ tittle-tattle “…please o, don’t tell anyone it was me that told you…” , but Nooooo…some of us no longer possess an ounce of self dignity to restrain ourselves.

Like Drake rightly said “…the hardest part of the business is minding your own…”, and like everything else that gives you a transitory and culpable satisfaction, Gossip is an addiction.

In closing, let’s all try and watch our thoughts because they become words. Let’s watch our words because they become actions. Let’s watch our actions as they become habits. Let’s watch our habits because they become character. And watch our character because it becomes our destiny.

This week’s Friday Track is the hottest ‘grower’ out there at the moment, this is Lloyd’s Lay it Down. This is some different style Atlanta 808-stylez, feel it LOUD.



  1. shi

    November 26, 2010 at 5:42 pm

    yayyyy..the ist to comment! am off 2 read…Somborri shout Kilon Sparkles!…

    • suuweeet poohtaatoes

      November 26, 2010 at 5:56 pm

      wait a minute….u re yet to ready???? wat on earth are u doing in d commentators page??? SMH

  2. iya

    November 26, 2010 at 5:59 pm

    Lol!!!! I’m so Guilty of this!!! God forgive me o!

  3. blithe

    November 26, 2010 at 6:24 pm

    i was waiting for the american gist sef… lol

    • D.O.T.M.H

      November 27, 2010 at 1:06 pm

      Mee too!!! lol

    • forreallzzzz

      November 30, 2010 at 6:57 am

      Lmao! Me three!!!

    • 'teefah

      December 16, 2010 at 6:19 pm

      Me four!!!!

  4. dupe

    November 26, 2010 at 6:29 pm

    i like 2 join u

  5. Another Ifeoma

    November 26, 2010 at 6:31 pm

    Suuweet potatoes…wetin consign you now? Mind your business

  6. missy~spectacularrr

    November 26, 2010 at 9:57 pm

    this stuff is soo good! consolation for not out tonight…mo’n sparkle gaan!
    Back to topic! i actually gossip sometimes and feel downright horrible after the session. guess sometimes we do it to validate ourselves like the writer rightly said…plus im sure someone womewhere is gossiping about me too!

  7. Lalala

    November 26, 2010 at 10:03 pm

    Hehehe totally true 🙂

  8. Seun

    November 26, 2010 at 10:38 pm

    so u now wet our appetite with the ‘2am american phone call’ and then u dont tell us what the ‘blockbuster’ gist was???? hiss!!! lol

    • missy~spectacularrr

      November 27, 2010 at 7:55 pm


    • angelica

      November 30, 2010 at 1:53 am

      aliee!!! how could u?? lol

  9. MJS

    November 26, 2010 at 11:09 pm

    i just love your opening phrase! You are so right, sometimes minding your own can be hard.

  10. Garnetcore "Boss"

    November 26, 2010 at 11:17 pm

    Love this song! been listening to it since yesterday. As for ‘gorgor’, i think sometimes it’s a desire to prove to the world that other peeps have more serious problems that drives us. Stopping myself the moment I realize what I am doing or about to do is my current remedy for this contagious, friendship-ruining, family-breaking malady. 😀

  11. Ready

    November 26, 2010 at 11:41 pm

    This one wasn’t as hilarious as the other ones….true talk though.

  12. Dijengala

    November 26, 2010 at 11:51 pm

    wow, very good write-up, quite profound. food for thoughts

  13. smiley

    November 27, 2010 at 2:22 am

    ha ha ha, nice piece. i used to do it b4…buh afta a while, i found out i dint like d feeling (of being found out) and i decided it wasnt worth it…so i jst stopped it. sounds unbelievable buh its true…
    and also, i dont give people an oppurtuity to gossip about me cos im open about all i do…. yup. even if im having an affair…i tell my frnds 🙂

    • mary007

      November 28, 2010 at 7:47 am

      Hmmm thats the more reason they would gossip about you, you do not have to give information to others that they dont really need to have

  14. babylawyer

    November 27, 2010 at 8:00 am

    Nice piece Bobo O. Plus there’s the method of sliding from d main gossip-fest into some sort of analysis or rationalization of d subject (with phrases like “I can guess I can understand why she did what she did…”; “I’m not being judgmental though but if u look at it from another angle…”; “its a shame but these things do happen…”) so that it seems like we are objectively assessing the situation instead of just plain old gossiping

  15. dubaisands

    November 28, 2010 at 7:07 am

    like it a lot..didn’t think Bobo was a writer.. met him a couple of times:)

  16. Ronnie

    November 28, 2010 at 2:08 pm

    So true!..I struggle with this often and then struggle with guilt after….It’s a bad habit though cos I never feel good about myself even though I thought talking ill behind somebody else would make me feel better about myself. defeats the purpose huh?

  17. Y-rimo

    November 28, 2010 at 10:05 pm

    True talk. I used to gossip a lot, i was like the gist master, i knew everything that was happening with everyone. Until something happened to me and the same people i used to gossip with started gossiping about me. it was the worst feeling. Since that day- NEVER AGAIN. Gossip is sweet if it aint about you.

  18. Pinky

    November 28, 2010 at 10:26 pm

    I have always said men are just as terrible as women when it comes to remixing and peddling gist and this proves it!
    p.s. Bobo haba, you could have at least shared the gist with us!

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