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A Brave Voice: Pop Culture Blogger Shei Funmi reveals abuse via in-depth interview for Ladybrille Mag’s December 2010 Issue

BellaNaija.com

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Celebrity Blogger Shei Funmi of sheifunmi.com makes the cover of Ladybrille Magazine’s December Holiday Edition as its ‘Man of the Month.’ The edition celebrates the spirit of the Holiday and those who give back to their local and global communities.

In the exclusive interview to be published on Wednesday December 8th, 2010 on the Magazine’s website (Ladybrillemag.com), the nineteen year old rising media personality opens up, for the first time, about being raped by his male cousin when he was only 10years old.

“Being raped by my cousin at ten had a devastating effect on me,” said Funmi. “I have struggled to overcome the emotional pain and kept the devastating experience to myself all these years. But after a friend of mine who went through a similar experience recently committed suicide, I knew I could no longer keep it to myself. I hope to encourage others who have gone through this to realize they are not alone and to seek help,” added Funmi. “The Ladybrille platform because of its credibility and respect for the people it features felt like the safest place to tell my story.”

It is really commendable that Shei Funmi is opening up about this tragic event. Sexual Abuse especially same sex sexual abuse is a taboo discussion in Nigeria and very rarely discussed openly. We hope that he has received counselling and pray that the mental and emotional scars are healed.

The Ladybrille ‘Man of the Month’ is a monthly feature on the online magazine which celebrates outstanding men, locally and internationally, for their brilliant contributions to society. Ladybrille magazine was founded in 2007 to de-stigmatize the negative images of Africans by exposing its youthful, urban and explosive fashion and entertainment industries to the Western masses.

The magazine also has a ‘Woman of the Month’ feature with a parallel mission. Making the cut for this month’s ‘Woman of the Month’ is Busie Matsiko-Andan – a change agent, co-founder of the popular Fashionindie.com website and an executive at The Global Syndicate non-profit organization.

“It’s an honor, humbling, and very exhilarating to closeout the year as Ladybrille Woman of the month!” said Matsiko-Andan. “I’m thrilled and buoyant that the struggle continues for greater horizons!”

The Holiday Edition also features 15 African Breakout Artists of the Year including Nneka (Nigeria), Ice Prince (Nigeria), X.O Senavoe (Ghana), Jojo (Gabon) , Navio (Uganda) and Diamond (Tanzania), Ladybrille’s Best of the Best New Designers, Accessory designers Yemisii and Adjanie.

20 Comments

  1. Nwa Baby

    December 3, 2010 at 5:26 pm

    So sad he had to go through that as a child.I hope he has found peace within himself.All the best.

    PS: I wonder why Nigerians are so hush hush about sexual abuse, they’ll rather let the perpetrator go free than do anything about it. But then our legal system is messed up and people dont believe they’ll get justice.

  2. sweetie

    December 3, 2010 at 5:29 pm

    I commend him for coming out to talk about this. I just hope that the mental and emotional scars are healed completely in Jesus Name. …..but what is wrong with human beings..your own cousin, ….in short even if it is not ur own cousin , any body for that matter, its so sad,sick, and evil ….i have resolved to take care of my kids myself, i am too paranoid about perverts hurting my babies…its just by the grace of God that we are all protected from perverts.

  3. abbiba

    December 3, 2010 at 5:52 pm

    utterly shocking but very brave of him to spek out we must step sex offenders way to go shei ur a remarkable youngman and an inspiration to other youngsters gng thru dese

  4. Dith

    December 3, 2010 at 6:16 pm

    It is high time this madness of protecting sex offenders in Nigeria stops!
    People need to stop making the victims feel like it’s their fault they got raped/abused.
    All these hush hush business does nothing but increase statistics.

    So sorry and pissed 2 hear what happened to him! But I admire his courage and strength.
    A Very Brave voice indeed.

  5. Naijamum

    December 3, 2010 at 6:31 pm

    I applaud his courage and strength.
    We are all quick to attack the western world for its ‘evil ways’ but we hush up whn it comes to our own nasty ways.
    I’m glad Shei has spoken up. I pray he will empower others to open up and realise that they do not need to suffer in silence.
    Shei, I send you a big, big hug!

  6. Kémi Penélopê

    December 3, 2010 at 7:52 pm

    In the U.S, one reads or hears about this every now and then. On the contrary, it’s considered a taboo. …the ones we are suppose to trust, are the violators themselves. Mothers, fathers or parent try to guard us from the harm from outside however; it is from within that we are infringed.
    I have often suspected that this happens in Nigeria; but the men folks talk rarely (especially given the fact, that they are raised to keep troubles within and find ways of resolving the issue…this way, they are seen as brave hearts). Then we have the women, who are taught to talk about it with a girlfriend, sibling, aunt or mother…
    Even though we may try to sweep the issue of rape (against a woman or same-sex) under the rug, it is high time we face up to the reality that people are still suffering from this. Many have been able to silently get over it (by God’s grace) while others are being eaten up by the stigma that leads them to commit suicide.

    God bless you, Sheifunmi, for sharing your story… am praying God gives you the strength to overcome the challenges that may come by.

  7. Fatima

    December 3, 2010 at 8:54 pm

    God bless him!!!!!!!! Such a brave soul.

  8. me

    December 3, 2010 at 9:15 pm

    I applaud him…he is very brave….

    but the realist in me needs to pioint out…that this happens a lot and ppl know that…but in other for it to be reduced..Then names need to be dropped…it would put more fear in other ppl…. If not its still dis dude that will survive the stigma associated with coming out and saying the truth..ppl need a face to be more connected and to blame…

    • me

      December 3, 2010 at 9:18 pm

      seems i pressed enter to fast

      PS.. if he doesnt name the person publicly.. he is just gonna be known as the dude that was raped by his cousin… dats how the jist usually goes…

    • aisha

      December 4, 2010 at 12:43 pm

      Thank you oh! I was just thinking the same thing.

  9. myne Whitman

    December 3, 2010 at 9:53 pm

    It is not easy, I pray he has the peace in his heart. SO many stories abound and I also laud Ladybrille for bringing this up. I trust that Uduak will handle the interview in a very mature manner.

  10. Oma

    December 4, 2010 at 3:13 pm

    well you answered your own question.
    people will rather avoid the pain of coming public when they know they cant trust our legal system yet.
    sexual offenders have no places leaving among humans.
    they should be isolated in some desert or something.
    http://lifethroughomaseyes.blogspot.com

  11. mary007

    December 5, 2010 at 6:45 am

    So what if he is known as the dude that was raped by his cousin??? the whole purpose of coming out is not to name names but that we start to speak about this, I know of so many stories and people who were abused and the ability for them to speak about it helps others who have being abused know its not their fault. In Nigeria I have always openly discussed abuse because I know it happens even when every family member is aware they want to hush it, its time we speak about it and others are helped!

  12. oddy

    December 5, 2010 at 1:30 pm

    awwwww..that is so sad i am happy pple can come and say stuff like this….i am sure he will hate that cousin of his….n that cousin must have done the same with helpness children……..SAD!!!

  13. Ujubaby

    December 5, 2010 at 2:05 pm

    I hope he prosecutes that cousin, and I’m glad he is speaking out. I also hope he doesn’t become homosexual because 95% of guys who experience sexual abuse as his turn out to be gay in the future!

  14. me

    December 5, 2010 at 2:43 pm

    as much as we want ppl to deal with an issue… there is no justice that comes from other ppl pitying you… i would not wish it on anybody to go around and have ppl saying oh poor boy he was raped by his cousin…
    wat is needed is for the perpetrator to be openly ridiculed, judged and publicly hated… that will offer some peace to the boy…
    not ppl going around saying aaaya lets talk about it.. its not your fault…

    while i can understand the merit in your argument of them thinking its their fault… i personally believe that while that should be tackled ..it will be off more help if people publicly ridiculed the perpetrators of the crime … a million people calling a person an evil ****** is bigger than a few friends saying its not your fault…

  15. Objective Viewer

    December 6, 2010 at 12:40 am

    I pray that his cousin that committed this deadly affecting mental act towards him shall be publicly humiliated and stoned to death, kai i can’t even imagine the type of things he would have been envisioning, the pain, the silence, the constant hurting and grief consuming and hunting him, God! what is this! lets stop expecting GOD to appear and judge this BASTARD lets do the right thing, I really admire his brave and rejuvenating soul haba by Age 10 i believe stoning him to death is not the solution, he must feel the pain he went through…i advice he is been beaten up badly till he can’t feel his bones and constantly been cut on every part of his body and his bones crushed with a sledge hammer and then sentenced to 10 years in prison of course with hard labor and finally he deserves to be killed at Gun point!

  16. mbabazi

    December 6, 2010 at 8:38 am

    God bless him for being strong enough to talk about his hurtful experience . I hope that he finds it within himself to forgive his cousin,the law however must be take shape and seek out this guy and punish him for his crime.

  17. biola

    December 6, 2010 at 9:36 am

    Wowzer!!! deep mehn, chai

  18. LAYDEE

    December 7, 2010 at 5:51 pm

    extremely brave , strong young man, Only God know’s what would compel human beings to do such rubbish, deeply disturbing

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