William Ifeanyi Moore: Feminism as a Social Construct

dreamstime_s_815960The idea that humans form groups to compete with other groups based on shared identity is nothing new in psycho-social theory. We have seen this in tribes, countries and race.
When we think of gender, it is easy to imagine a secret man-meeting held all around the world with men twisting our mustache as we hatch out yet more sinister plans to undermine women. I assure you ladies, this is not true. There is no secret order of man spanning centuries in place to maintain a patriarchal system. So please, when we think about feminism, we need to stop seeing men as perpetrators and woman as victims.

Rather than engaging in this endless gender warfare, how about we try to apply some thinking to human behavior and why against out better knowledge that women are equal to men, we still persist with sexist behavior, even in apparently more developed parts of the world.

Personally, I have a theory, and ladies, y’all aren’t going to like this. The whole notion of a social construct is that…well…it is a “construct”. This implies that it has a structure, and these structures can only rest on human instincts and aspiration. Unfortunately, for women, to be dominated has proved the common instinct and I will prove it to you.

If you are bothered by sex of a primal nature, this might be a good time to stop reading. If you are as perverse as I imagine you probably are, then by all means, make yourself at home.

Sex remains one of the few acts we allow our primal self to be unleashed it. Take it from me guys, no woman is going to orgasm from a gentle f*ck. Women haven’t evolved from our days in the caves to be satisfied by some guy thrusting like the vagina was made of glass. But the roughness of thrust isn’t even the issue here. Psychologically, a woman is turned on by the domination of a man in bed. This is why women want their hair pulled, ass spanked…and yes, some women would literally ask you to talk dirty to them like ‘call me your dirty slut’. Such behavior is very much in line with what Sigmund Freud father of psychotherapy called our repressed animal past.

In civil society, however, we have created constructs that we live with, to enable us function as ‘higher animals’. But even at that, there is something about weakness in a man that turns women off. And when I say weakness, I am not talking about physical strength. I mean by any yardstick she measures strength. It is for this reason that a woman wouldn’t be attracted to marrying a man she is richer than or date a man she is blatantly intellectually superior to.

For men, this means there is always the pressure to dominate, and the more you can dominate, the larger pool of mates you will have to pass on your genes. As a result of this pressure, men first systematically oppressed women in general to compensate. Now we are passed systematic oppression, we are using cultural and social oppression. Until men are in a position where we can be secure in knowing that we would not lose the opportunity to mate with whoever we want because we are weaker (I can finally get Genevieve), subconsciously, we would continue to oppress women to compensate.

I can only hope that somewhere in the future is a utopian egalitarian world where gender roles and expectation are gone. But based on the world today, I will not live to see this society. And ladies, in some way or the other, men will try to oppress to dominate. It is a sad, sad reality. Ironic, that the more developed a society becomes, the less sexist it is. This is because systems are in place to help, so men don’t have to be macho. Nigeria is a long way from the top.

Photo Credit: Dreamstime

84 Comments on William Ifeanyi Moore: Feminism as a Social Construct
  • Regina February 9, 2016 at 8:44 pm

    What utter, complete sexist horse pucky. Women “like” to be slapped? To be dominated?

    Bella, you gotta stop posting these pseudo-intellectual pieces by young men who don’t understand the first thing about the basics of feminism and who sit on their pedestal and try to tell women what they, basking in all their newly found manly glory, think women should feel and think about feminism.

    Lord help with these children!

    • William February 9, 2016 at 9:26 pm

      Simple questions..

      1) Do women generally prefer to dominante or to be dominated in bed?

      2) Are powerful men genreally more attractive to women than less powerful men?

      3) Where did I say women like being slapped? I didn’t even use the word ‘slap’, I said spank in reference to female sexual behaviour.

      4) Is it so far-fetched that sexist behaviour is an over-compensation for the pressure on men to be dominating?

      5) What part of this article puts men on a pedestal?

      6) What part of this article has been blatantly factually inaccurate?

      7) And for every lady reading this…are you more likely to be attracted to a man you consider weaker than yourself in whatever way you grade strength and weakness?.

      P.S Please, you can disagree with the information, but before insulting the writer, how about some intelligent contribution to move the conversation forward? Emotional reactions like this is the reason we can’t actually hold a civil conversation about feminism. I am not even saying I’m 100% right, the entire article is speculative as most pyscho-social theories are. But the point isn’t about right and wrong, it’s to generate conversation. And insulting the writer is about as useful as spitting at rain in this scenario. Na wa, a man can’t have his opinion again?

      • Ann February 9, 2016 at 9:54 pm

        Women are different. No two women like the same thing in bed. Women are individuals. I couldn’t even finish this article. It’s so filled with generalizations. I don’t even understand how sex enter the feminist matter. women are not a monolith.

      • red pill male February 9, 2016 at 11:02 pm

        Interesting article. A world devoid of gender roles and expectations. Are you sure this is what you would want? Our very society is based on each gender fulfilling their biological imperative. Take that away and you have a world of mgtow (google it), feminazis, and gender-fluid beings: This is the definition of hell on earth. Men and women can and should coexist WITH specific gender roles and expectations.

        Also women like to be dominated and not just in the bedroom. Your statement about weak men is so true. There is a reason why the bad boy gets the girl and nice guys finish last.

      • William February 9, 2016 at 11:05 pm

        @Ann by that line of thinking, no one would ever write any article about society. The general idea of social critique is to generalize. It is what passes for general social behaviour that becomes social culture. These generalizations aren’t just necessary, they are important to understand. And shying away from generalizations about women because they don’t flatter the gender is kinda dangerous. Women organize slut-walks and whatnot, like all men roam the streets to cat-call women or buy into the ‘she wore that so she wanted it’ idea, but even knowing only a minority of men do these things, it is still worth everyone’s attention. Just saying.

        And if no two woman is the same in bed, does this mean men have to get a completely different orientation every time we sleep with a new woman? By this logic a woman can never call a man out for being bad in bed, it’s different every time, we can’t get better at it unless we sleep with one person repeatedly to learn their own unique sexual needs…

    • Drknite February 9, 2016 at 9:49 pm

      I like to be slapped and dominated!

      • A Real Nigerian February 9, 2016 at 10:25 pm

        Yaaay!!

      • ElessarisElendil February 10, 2016 at 1:52 am

        ?

        As they say honesty………………………………..godliness.

    • ElessarisElendil February 10, 2016 at 1:50 am

      ?????

      Your response to an idea you disagree with is censorship???

      if only the patriarchy had that brilliant idea with the women’s liberation movement. I just can’t with you people.

  • dongagaleo@gmail.com February 9, 2016 at 8:56 pm

    I know we have some of the most sexist, misogynists men in this part of the world.
    Now, let us admit it, the fight for equality in this part of the world is not as strong as that of the western world. It is not even half as strong. The thing is, many ladies are so intrigued by the word ‘feminist’ that they would call themselves one without even understanding what it is to be one. The men on the other hand want respect because they are men. Yes to your talk on dorminance, African men love dorminance, they want control, they want everything.
    But, most people want to be ‘feminists’ because it is the trend. Most women think they are ‘feminist’ because they are mean to men, most women claim to be ‘feminists’ then go and work to bring their fellow women down.
    Feminism here, feminism there. The real feminists do not announce it all over the place. The know what it means to demand for equality. What it means to attain those goals and then put down the ladder for other women to climb and meet them there.
    I have never had sex before but I dont think because a woman wants to be spanked or called dirty names means she is less of a feminist.
    In all, my point is that being a feminist in Africa is a thing of convenience. I want equality but a lot has to go in the struggle than briefly saying I am a femist to be in the trend.

    • A Real Nigerian February 9, 2016 at 9:25 pm

      ^Took the words right outta my mouth.

    • Nahum February 9, 2016 at 11:41 pm

      Well said!

    • Adelaide February 10, 2016 at 4:20 pm

      I truly loved your reply but however, there’s no ‘r’ in dominance

  • A Real Nigerian February 9, 2016 at 9:13 pm

    The so-called writers and bloggers in Nigeria should pick a few lessons from this article and learn. Most of them lack the ability to express themselves in a simple, entertaining and thought-provoking manner. The pacing is great, there are no big words used needlessly to prove that he is an intellectual, no convoluted and cringeworthy humor and no attempt to show off or try too hard. He didn’t need to do any of this before passing his message across.
    Short, easy to read, engaging and exciting. This article – even though not completely accurate – is so well-written that it has the ability to convince someone who might not have originally agreed with sexist behaviour to start thinking otherwise.
    This is much better than the trash I read on this website week in, week out.
    Great job, man.

  • Read February 9, 2016 at 9:28 pm

    Read this article
    panafricanhub.weebly.com/blog/short-write-up-the-fear-of-feminism-in-nigeria

  • Babym February 9, 2016 at 9:53 pm

    Loool! This is why i refuse to be called a feminist! No one (including me) knows what it means anymore, ppl just come up with all kinds of definitions and scenarios to suit what they think it is. So really, y do i want to be associated with something that is sooooo mind buggling. I am a woman i love equality and respect male a d female differences and that is enough for me.

  • Nikky February 9, 2016 at 10:13 pm

    Men have oppressed women for years. They put up rediculous obstacles that prevented women from competing with them. Through the feminist movement these obstacles were removed. If you look at the history of developed countries like the United States and Canada, women didn’t enjoy the same rights and freedoms men did. They could not go to school, own property, divorce abusive husbands, inherit property, participate in politics etc. The list goes on theses restrictions made sure women were held down ie. They were oppressed. Women were seen as frigidly irrational beings that could not do these things I mentioned above and the men in power (that is government) had policies in place that made sure women were baby making machines owned by their husbands.

    We live in 2016 and women can do all these things I mentioned (for the most part). It is only possible that I can run for political office today if I want to because brave men and women stood up and challenged the misogynyst status quo and succeeded in changing the system.
    Your point on sexual domination is not just rediculous it Infact lazy. sexual domination is not gender specific. The fact that some women enjoy this type of sex does not mean that women folk are wired to be dominated.

    • William February 9, 2016 at 11:40 pm

      Systemic oppression is very different from social oppression. Long before the word feminism existed, women ruled kingdoms in Africa. The place of women in Western society is very different from that of Africa. In fact, we learned most of our sexism from our colonial masters. Most of it passed from religion. Typically, African women dressed to show a lot of skin and never got objectified or slut-shaped. Igbo girls have been rocking tube-tops and Fulani babes owned crop-tops before oyibo came to teach us that women have to cover up. Besides that, the issue of translating what is deliberate subjugation in history is not so simple. When our ancestors were still dying at 30 from their wisdom tooth growing or simple bacterial infection, it only made sense to make sure women were kept away from hunting to increase the chances of the specie’s survival. It also made sense to be polygamous because the human gestation period almost a year and men died a lot more from exposure to all sorts. The problem humans have had forever is knowing when a structure is outgrown and requires change. Eventually, a movement kicks off and it goes through a cycle of over-compensation before it balances out. Before the industrial revolution, women weren’t so keen to work. And today, the population of women in menial and labour intensive jobs can attest to this. Women will complain that they are under-represented in management positions, but not once have I seen a call for more women in brick-laying.

      Sex is only used as a vehicle in this article. The point is that women generally prefer stronger men when it comes to partnership. I will ask again, what is the percentage of women okay with the notion of being stronger than their male counterparts? Sex is just a primal act that displays this preference. Even studies in women at executive level showed over 70% of female executives to have a preference for men more successful than they are. I will also ask the house, how many women are happy with a long-term sex life where they are the one fucking the man (excuse my language, but you know what I mean). It is easy to dismiss a claim like ‘women generally prefer to be dominated’, but can we say women are generally indifferent or women generally prefer to dominate men? It has to be one of the three if we are to follow logic right?

      All I am saying is that men and women participate in the social construct but it is often presented like women are 100% victims of circumstance. If women generally were indifferent to male power and success, do you really think we would be here bending over backward to make money? It’s just like make-up and women. If men really didn’t care for beauty, women would still make-up, but it would be nowhere near as lucrative an industry as it is today.

      • Feminist February 10, 2016 at 12:11 pm

        I love this comment, Yes I want a man stronger than me, dominant, not abusive, I want a man that’s smarter than me, I don’t want to have to baby my husband and the man, nope.
        Women can’t pick and choose when they want equality,
        you want equality but you are not happy to split the bill,
        you want equality but your money is “my” money and his money is “our” money.
        The sooner we agree that men and women play specific and important roles as they are and intended to be the better for us.
        Real feminists held it down, they fought for what was right and not this equality BS

      • Adelaide February 10, 2016 at 4:26 pm

        William I couldn’t agree more with you, you are not insulting in your comments. Most women may think they know what feminism is just because the likes of Chimamanda and Beyonce have interpreted it for us. However when most other women try to get to the top this same fellow women insult and degrade them. I am not a feminist and yes I am female

    • ElessarisElendil February 10, 2016 at 2:27 am

      “Men have oppressed women for years. They put up rediculous obstacles that prevented women from competing with them.”????? Gods through the ages save me from revisionist history.

      As with all things let’s start from the beginning………….well not the actual beginning with God speaking the galaxies into existence or the one further down the line with Man crawling out of the primordial muck, No further down the line when Man’s means of sustenance was as a hunter-gatherer. The Men hunted, the women gathered and there was equality rather unlike your careless assertion that women were prevented from competing! Are you joking? What I would give to see a scrawny woman tackling a mammoth(Yes scrawny, its a scientific fact that our ancestors were smaller than us, women are still generally shorter and physically weaker than Men now! with the benefit of better nutrition, now take your imagination back millennia). Nonetheless there was equality because the women played a vital role in gathering meat supplements and most importantly bringing forth and protecting the next generation. Humanity owes women a massive rather obvious debt for the species survival. Again traces of the mentality of time can be deduced from their Gods glorifying womanhood e.g ‘Venus’ the pre-Roman European one, Google.

      Agriculture would bring settled living and again the usefulness of Man. Unless you had the wonderfully brilliant idea of a solely female fighting force(we all know how both the European and African Amazons turned out right) Men were the ones to call(still are). We could of course see the beginnings of male domination in the ascension of Zeus and perhaps in its purest form Allah all dominating needing no companions.

      That was the world inherited by our 19th century and early 20th century forebears, you claim that “Women” enjoyed less rights than “Men” well get in line the souls of losers of history from the Akkadians to the Black race scream back to you. Until recently you realise that life was “nasty and brutish” a winner takes all experiment where only the fittest survived, it is only thanks to the dreams and brilliance of great Men that a world that can aspire to egalitarianism was created. In this world THEY created women no longer have to be cloistered, now once again we can benefit from their undoubted brilliance.

      I’m however irritated by people like you that attempt to reduce millienia into simplistic explanations of good and evil! History is a bit like Saruman with its many colours, our ancestors did what they did often with the best of intentions for the future of the species was at stake. Under the guardianship of men Man has left the caves behind to touch the very stars as we embark into a new centuries with Women uncaged will we top the achievements of centuries past or will women choose to whine about the necessary actions Men living in a far crueler world than ours were forced to make.

  • Hawt Talk With Tosan February 9, 2016 at 10:27 pm

    I am a woman and after 37 years of being one, I can finally and unabashedly admit that we do not know what we want. If you like bite me. This is my opinion

    • Californiabawlar February 10, 2016 at 12:53 am

      What do you want that you don’t know? What you want out of your career? What you want from your family? What you want from men/romantic relationships? What you want from God? Or is it what cut of meat you want from the butcher in the market? Please tell me exactly what it is you and apparently ‘all women’ are ignorant about, so I can learn something new about myself ?

      I’ll assume you mean what you want from men, yeah? Did someone tell you the other gender has it all figured out? Or that their needs and likes stay the same?
      Okay, I won’t act like I’m oblivious of what you’re referring to though….you’re basically misrepresenting COMPROMISE. The disease that women have been plagued with! Present company included. The other day I commented about a struggle bae, a guy that likes me but possesess maybe 1 or 2 qualities I want in a man but I’m seriously considering going steady with. Now, if I do that does it mean I stopped knowing I want intelligent witty guys? Nope. It just means I compromised because I’m turning 30. But you know what? After a while I’ll calm my titties realize my mum will survive having an old spinster daughter and leave him. You see with that scenario? again, I know what I want, compromise for what I don’t want and see that it won’t work, then go back to the original plan.
      This is the pattern i see in most friends.

      Please self awareness will save you a lot of grief and boost your self esteem…try that over just lumping yourself into a condescending stereotype!

      • Hawt Talk With Tosan February 10, 2016 at 2:54 am

        Calm down babe. Its not that serious. Unfortunately I did not have the time to type an epistle of exactly what I mean and still do not.. In fact my hubby will be shocked that I wrote that because he says I AM OVERLY FEMINIST

        What I meant had nothing to do with all you wrote. You either get it or you don’t.

        Now let me go back to cooking, cleaning, then preparing my 3 kids for school after which I will work on a presentation for work, then edit my YouTube video before I ‘pet’ oga to sleep and finally shut my eyes at 2am. I will do all these smiling and professing I am a feminist who can do it all after all.

      • californiabawlar February 10, 2016 at 4:39 am

        Ehn? It’s serious o! It serious when a fellow woman comes online to perpetuate and certify demeaning stereotypes. But yeah..I don’t get it….though you coulda simply clarified in just one line….
        I lay no claims on being a feminist…I’m simply a responsible adult who won’t be shat on for any reason especially not because I have a vjayjay. All the best to you doing your thing though…lets just leave other women out of it.

      • Doxa February 10, 2016 at 8:37 am

        Californiabawlar, you didn’t speak a lie.
        In the end, I know that my mother wishes me a happy marriage more than a quick one.
        I trust God though, it won’t be too long from now.

    • molly February 10, 2016 at 4:21 am

      Speak for yourself biko. If you are a confused 37year old. I know many 25 year old women even who know exactly what they want and gor it. Age is really just a number.

  • Ify February 9, 2016 at 10:43 pm

    Lol I always read this clown’s articles to get a good laugh. Is this not the same man that said that if a “grown women” goes over to a guy’s house to netflix and chill then she should be willing to have sex? Seriously a disgrace and honestly people like him perpetuate the notion that African men are insecure and controlling. What woman offended you? As in who broke your heart to the point where all you seem to write about condemns and vilifies women and sympathizes with men and encourages misogynist behavior? Whoever offended this small boy trapped in a grown man’s body, I take God bed you ohhh atone for your sins so this child- I mean man can let go of this misogyny that is clouding his mind, I feel sorry for any whoever marries you to be honest. Do better.

    • William February 10, 2016 at 1:07 am

      Na wa oh, my own fellow Ify again, chai. Thanks for reading sha…

    • ElessarisElendil February 10, 2016 at 2:31 am

      “It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” -Theodore Roosevelt.

      Help me make it gender neutral and apply the lessons within, unless of course its so disgusting to you being uttered by a Man.

  • Engoz February 9, 2016 at 10:54 pm

    I’m not sold on your domination in sex premise because Sex itself is a leveler and reduces everyone to equality. We see this attitude when older men sleep with younger girls. When we see a young girl ‘disrespecting’ the older guy who she would normally respect, we suspect sex has been involved. There is no master and slave in sex other than in the context of role playing, where a man can even role play to be dominated.

    I will also like to add that most women orgasm via the clitoris…so all tugging and hair pull is primarily just an act to make you the man feel like you are doing something. Don’t be deceived by porn or whatever erotic novels you may have read. Clitoral stimulation is the most important to orgasm. With feminism more women can be more honest on this salient truth we try to keep hidden. If it were by domination more women would orgasm, but at this point about 75 percent of all women never reach orgasm from intercourse alone without the extra help of sex toys.

    It is important to note that there wouldn’t be feminism if patriarchy had curbed it’s excesses. So you guys should blame yourself, lol.

    • larz February 10, 2016 at 4:01 pm

      Thank you. Toys have more success rate and it doesnt tug, spank or pull

  • Qua February 9, 2016 at 11:31 pm

    This is the history of feminism for the dumb black who are following it…The real history of feminism in America is that of rich white elite females who thought they were entitled to the right to vote. Just as originally only wealthy landowning white men were allowed to vote.

    “Actually, American feminism was virtually one with the anti-slavery movement, until the black abolitionist leadership decided that feminism was a liability and betrayed and abandoned the feminists. They forced women (that includes black women) to wait another 50 years for voting rights. ”

    That is the biggest lie ever told. White women, including white feminist, have been some of the biggest racists in America. The idea that only southern white women were racist is a huge myth.

    Just like so called white liberal women today are having fits because a few black women have received roles in movies and TV. You even have them spouting nonsense about black people having it easier than white women. Just ignoring the history of what black women have endured.

    White men learned their racism, both in the north and south, from their white mothers. In northern cities some of the loudest screamers and biggest rock throwers were white women throwing rocks at black children on school buses.

    The myth of the victimized white woman is just that a myth. Even now the biggest recipients of affirmative action have been white women.

  • Naomi February 9, 2016 at 11:36 pm

    Everytime woman matter William kilode? All u write is women, gender, feminism…abeg rest

  • chi-e-z February 10, 2016 at 1:05 am

    hmm ok I wasn’t sure where that write-up was going at first… some points made

  • Oge.A February 10, 2016 at 1:15 am

    Mr William it’s sad that such an intelligent young man like you don’t understand the concept of feminism. Not your fault though,cos the vast majority of your gender don’t.
    Feminism is simply about equality of the sexes. It is a cultural institution. Let me elaborate, “Feminism is about gender equality in all facets of life, be it political,social,economic or otherwise. Feminists are NOT man haters or female versions of the Superman who want superiority over men. Feminists DON’T want to be defined by their gender but to have equal opportunities and rights with men. They want to be seen as a person; a human being whose work is taken seriously on its own merit.” ~Alaoma Ogechi.
    The idea of feminism isn’t some deeply intellectual concept that requires years of study to comprehend on even a basic level.
    And of course being a man,you had to make it about sex which is the least of what feminism represents for women.

    I visit this site often but never comment(although i do enjoy reading many of the comments here). This is my first time to comment being that the topic is one that affects me as a feminist.
    It’s late,wish i had more time, would have written an ‘epistle’ on this cos am very passionate about feminism and everything it represents.

  • Swizzey February 10, 2016 at 1:27 am

    A sizable number of Naija babes call themselves feminists but yet haven’t read its history.Their own understanding of feminism can be summarized in two sentences.
    1. Men are useless,hence they are not needed
    2. What a man can do a woman can do better.

    At the end of the day, while embracing your adulterated feminism,you have opened yourself to a form of creeping lesbianism.

  • Cindy February 10, 2016 at 1:32 am

    I have officially given up on William’s. First it was netflix and chill subtly trying to justify date rapes, then it was something about political correctness and wanting to say whatever, damning the consequences. I couldn’t finish reading this right up. The generalizations, damn. “Women like to, women love to..”, coming from someone that has never been a woman in his life. Imagine if I said all men are cheats, how would that make you feel? This right here is one of the reasons I became a feminists. In my early years, I hated domestic chores. It wasn’t able layness because if you asked me to do any other thing besides cleaning, cooking, etc, I would do them so well and with all motivation. People just didn’t understand, it was always a case of ‘you are a woman, you must know how to do this’. My argument was always ‘but I dont like doing this, you can’t make me love what I don’t love’. Just like some people love football and others telemundo, different strokes for different folks. My problem with the society is trying to restrict women to a preconceived ideology. This my orientation was long before I knew the word ‘feminism’. And this has to do with both genders. I was watching TV with my bro the other day and he made a comment about guy who was crying to his ex-gf, he said he hated ‘weak guys’. I rushed to the guys defense immediately. Every one should be able to express their emotional pain. If it is repressed, it will rear its head in another form, often violence.
    Even so called Christians have conveniently twisted the Bible as regards equality. I am a feminist who believe women and men are different but difference does no mean unequal. 2 is still the same as 6/3. Never did the scriptures say women are weak, it clearly says that we are the weaker vessels. Do we even know what a vessel is? It is our physical body that is weak, not how mind or intellect. That makes sense even in our biological make up. I belive t is for a reason and not because we ate meant to be oppressed. I personally think the reason we are not as strong as men physically is because we reserve almost all pur strength for labor and because we are natural nurturers in terms of breastfeeding. Hence we can’t have all that muscle so as not to mistakenly injure a new born. Like they say, when the purpose of a thing is unknown, abuse is imminent. Somehow, the society intepretes our physical limited strength (I don’t want to call it weakness because we are strong in our own way) as being good for nothing other than attending to every other person’s needs except ours. As a feminist, all i want is to be happy. Why must i be the one always sacrificing my happiness for others just because I’m a woman? Lastly, William, against popular opinion, I am a woman and I don’t want to be dominated. I want to be respected just like I dish out respect.

  • sippingtea February 10, 2016 at 1:44 am

    What a nauseating article. Mr. Man are you telling me that you know the mind of all women? What quantitative research have you done to prove this tripe you have written? Give us statistics and concrete evidence. Women are not a monolith. I for one do not enjoy being slapped or called a slut. I know some men that enjoy being slapped and dominated, perhaps these men are women in disguise…mumu…It is always the misogynists that claim to be experts on women. A sign that you are a misogynist- you are constantly trying to reassure yourself and others that all women are in some way lesser than men or that all women are the same. Why so obsessed? You know what you need? A slap. Maybe it will realign ya brain.

  • Stella February 10, 2016 at 1:47 am

    Saw this article and ant to put it here
    ,….How Black Women Got Conned By White Feminism

    Back in the 1970’s, millions of white women burned their bras in defiance for being bored housewives. They created a movement basically convincing women that being a stay at home mother was terrible and damn white men for treating them like queens. White women became the trick that convinced many Black women that they didn’t need Black men and for those who were naive enough to believe this lie; the White Feminist movement became the biggest con of all to try and subjugate and dominate Black women in a way that slavery, White Supremacy or Black men never could. The objective: To take her away from the Black man.

    For the most part, the majority of Black women never bought into feminism. Black women have always worked and in Africa; the woman was esteemed.

    What was the con? The White Feminist movement tricked some Black women into fighting for something they already had: FREEDOM. There is an old cliche that speaks to this: “The only two things that are free in America are a black woman and a white man.”

    White women can’t stand Black women–many fear us. However, they don’t mind using Black women, particularly those naive enough to buy into dome pseudo-sisterhood that quite frankly, is the ultimate oxymoron.

    What do we see today?

    Black men and women at odds. And who’s in bed with the Black man, sistahs? White women.

    Image

    “During the 1970s, the white woman told the black woman to “get out of the kitchen”, get on the birth control pill, get an abortion and stop having babies; because women should not be “barefoot pregnant, and in a hot kitchen.”

    But, 25 years later, these SAME white, Feminists women are now sleeping with black men, cooking for black men, marrying black men and seeking to have half black children….duh!!!!!

    This, and this alone proves how black women have been tricked out of their own men by Women’s Lib’ (O.J. Simpson) the same way Eve was tricked by the snake in the Garden of Paradise. This should teach us all a lesson.

    A woman’s place is at home; and if we don’t say this, then how will women ever know what their proper place is while Feminists are in the media, all day and night, telling women otherwise?!!

    Since black women deserted Black Liberation and black men, white women simply adopted him like he was a poor, lost, lonely stray puppy. This is best typified by the epic movie Jungle Fever.

    And after white Feminist women recruited black women into the socalled “alternative lifestyles” of bisexuality, homosexuality, gay marriage, interracial marriage, etc., black men were recruited next!!!”

    So, Shonda Rhimes strikes back and gives us Scandal as some type of consolation. Really? A smart, successful Black woman, settling for being the booty call of the President, but never First Lady. Huh? It’s made me start to re-think my support of this show.

    Black women are eating it up–and white women have the audacity to say that they want to be Olivia Pope–she’s just exercising her sexual liberation.

    Can’t wait for the babydaddy episode. Wonder how that one is gonna go over.

    I wrote an article on this blog speaking to the image of our community asking why they are promoting Interracial unions between whites and Blacks; and I started thinking about all of the imagery and political ploys that have been directed at our community over a generation that was designed to subliminally tear the Black family apart. But why? What is white America so afraid of? Does the image of strong, happy, successful, Black people scare white folks that bad. You have to think deep as to the WHY on this one: BLACK POWER!!! And Black unity is a threat to White Supremacy.

  • Stella February 10, 2016 at 1:55 am

    What follows is a fact sheet about Gloria Steinem’s operations against the various social and political movements in America, particularly her role in creating a hateful and virulent strain of Black feminism that attacks Black men while partnering with the white establishment.

    Gloria Steinem first came across the radar of Black men in 1978 when Steinem put a book called “Black Macho and the Myth of the Superwoman” on the cover of Ms. Magazine, the magazine which she controlled. The book was “written” by a Black “feminist” and “activist” named Micele Wallace who came out of nowhere. Wallace was in her early twenties at the time, yet she was being touted as the “leader” of Black feminism. In the book, Wallace called abolitionists like Harriet Tubman and Sojouner Truth “ugly” and “stupid” for supporting Black men. She called Black Revolutionaries “chauvinist macho pigs” and advised Black women to “go it alone.” Gloria Steinem said that Wallace’s book would “define the future of Black relationships” and she pushed hard to make sure the book received massive publicity. Gloria Steinem’s work triggered a flood of “Hate Black Men” books and films that continues to this day. Needless to say, some were quite suspicious of Ms. Magazine and Gloria Steinem. Why was Steinem sticking her nose into the affairs of the Black community? So people started doing some research on Steinem. When it came out that Gloria Steinem was probably the ghost writer of the book with Michele Wallace’s name on it, Wallace had a nervous breakdown and went into hiding for two years. However, the damage was already done and the “Hate Black Men” movement was off and running. But the research into Gloria Steinem’s background continued. What follows is the findings of many different researchers.

    BOTTOM LINE: The so-called “Black Feminist” movement was created and manipulated by the CIA from the very beginning. The only difference between Black Revolutionaries and Black Feminist on this issue is that the Black Revolutionaries KNOW they were infiltrated and manipulated—But Black Feminist are still unwilling to admit that they were infiltrated and manipulated, largely because they are highly invested in the hateful brand of Black feminism. As a result, the “Hate Black Men” movement has become MORE THAN just a political point a view: It is now a central part of the CULTURE of Black women and this fact has led to the destruction of the Black Revolution and the complete distortion of Black relationships. And the CIA had a direct hand in creating this situation.

  • Stella February 10, 2016 at 1:57 am

    FACT: Here’s a list of how the kind of feminism advocated by Gloria Steinem has actually BENEFITED the business community when it pushed women into the work place:

    • Women work for less (and Black women work for A LOT LESS).
    • Women are more docile and less likely to deviate from company policies (and Black women are the most docile workers of all).
    • Women are less likely to join labor unions.
    • By increasing the size of the labor pool, women created more competition for jobs thus reducing wages.
    • More female workers means more p*u*s*s*y for the boss (Black female executives are notorious for being “passed around” among white executives—mainly because their low self-esteem makes them think that such “attention” is a compliment. Do you know any white male executives? Talk to them when you get a chance. They use the term “instant pussy” when referring to the Black female executives in their companies.).
    • In two-income families, one person is more likely to work part-time or as a temporary, such workers get paid less and they don’t get benefits.
    • Taking children away from their mothers at an early age tends to increase their anxiety levels and results in higher rates of tension-relieving consumption as they grow up (and Black folks have become SUPER consumers, especially Black women).
    • The loss of women’s household services increases purchases of various forms of fatty fast foods, which have higher profit levels than home-cooked meals (this has particularly affected Black women: their blubber index has skyrocketed).

  • californiabawlar February 10, 2016 at 2:23 am

    Sex is has always been about power…. Since the days of Queen Sheba to Helen of Troy to that 20year old down the street banging a 50year old’s brains out…women have been actively getting off on the power trip too. Have you ever heard of the casual phrase, the power and art of seduction?
    You should learn that all this your preconceived pseudo-intellectual notions will only end up making you a long term terrible lover…
    I as a girl and I put it to you, yes I might like being tied up or dominated? Yes, I also might like being in control every now and then…other times we just want something calm, slow and mutual….gra gra does not open the door…you have to get a key bro….and the key here is being attentive. I know I know!! You have a trail of girls who got a taste of the bole and keep ‘coming’ back for more…but how does it translate into the long term? You think all your hair pulling won’t get boring? Na you sabi jare….even if all the girls in Lagos told you otherwise, you will still believe you have it all figured out. Plus I see BN is pitching you as the annoying controversial guy…we all know controversy sells.
    Oh! here’s a suggestion for your next talk! “If you collect valentine cookie, you must give up the cookie”…something along the lines…you can make it sound a tad less crass and a little smarter…you know how you do! 😉 😉

    • ElessarisElendil February 10, 2016 at 4:05 am

      Or perhaps steps to take when you give Valentine cookie, go looking for cookie and in a plot twist for the ages find a sausage instead?

      • californiabawlar February 10, 2016 at 7:20 pm

        Iyanma!!! Why is your mind so dirty like this??
        Well, I doubt bros will write about that, since the topic will now involve sausages…he seems to be most comfortable in the cookie realm….

    • William February 10, 2016 at 8:52 am

      Bella isn’t pitching me as anything, I write what I want and send to them. I decided to write more controversial pieces because I thought it was necessary, and if the feedback from comments is anything to go by, then yes, it is. For all the epistles women have come to record on this post, no one is yet to state that the generalization that women are more attracted to powerful men is false, or that women don’t generally like being the more powerful one in relationships. These are the premise of the articles, but instead everyone is out here fixated on sex, which was just a vehicle to pass the notion.

      Yes, women have been on the sex power trips too. Yes, I have dated long-term and I know it’s not everyday the man is dominant. But I will ask you again, when it comes to power…

      1) Are women generally more attracted to powerful men? Yes or No

      2) Do women generally prefer men weaker or stronger than them in relationships?

      The very reason a lot of guys don’t air such views is because reposnses like this always come up. So we fall into silence and pretence compliance. And let’s not even go into how casual man-bashing has become in Nigeria. But God forbid a man writes something that doesn’t completely flatter women. And I don’t even see how this article bashes women, but it appears that a lot of readers cannot wait to play victim. The article clearly states that sexist behaviour might emerge from over-compensation from men demanded to show power. Or are you going to sit there and tell me that there is no social expectation on men to be powerful? It just like how some men throw money at women hoping it would buy their love and affection. It is an over-compensation, but it exists because women have been known to respond positively to resources. It doesn’t make it right, but it is what it is.

      Do you realize how difficult being a writer is in this social media era when every Ada, Bimpe and Mariam can come with comments straight up attacking your character because you shared an opinion they didn’t like? You aren’t supposed to like or agree with everything I write, that’s not what a writer is supposed to do. The post is supposed to challange you to bring in contributions to the coversation and not a lecture on what is good and bad for my dating and sex life. For all you know I prefer being dominanted and rather have her ride cow-girl. Do you know I have writer friends that expressly say they can’t write for BN because they are afraid of comments. Is this really the culture we want to promote here? We can do better, we must do better.

      Good day.

      • Bella Noire February 10, 2016 at 10:34 am

        No one is interested in your sob story. If you can dish rubbish, then you better be ready to take it too. And I hope Bella Naija knows that publishing these kinds of articles also suggests that BN endorses them. At least, I don’t see a disclaimer anywhere.

      • Somtoo February 10, 2016 at 2:33 pm

        Oga williams, if you do not want us fixating on the sex part of the article, then find a better way of passing your message. Stop make us all sound so generic. I think that’s the most irritating part of this piece. Too much generalizations. For the record, which one is spank me? Spank me ke? This my soft skin that shows welts once you hold me roughly? Abi is it the harder harder part? Some of us that are small, you want to tear us apart? Smh

        I really don’t give a hoot about feminism and all the brouhaha. I love being a woman, a strong woman. I know when to be bossy and domineering and i also know when to be soft, sweet and like a cold drink of water on a sunny day. Its all balance.

        Do i like powerful men, nah. Do i like strong men, yes. When i say strong, i mean a man who know when to apply strength in certain situations that call for strength. A man who is powerfully passionate about things that matter to him (I must top that list o).

        A dominating man in bed, lai lai. Mba. A man that takes charge occasionally seduces me when he wants the cookie and allows me seduce him when im needing the D, Now that, i like 🙂 Chai, let me remind myself im celibate!

        Afterall is said and done. Its all balance. Women arent the same, the same way men arent. I used to think that all men are basic until i met some that astounded me.

        Enough of all these your noise willy. This your controversial ship has sailed biko and is frankly getting annoying. (Angry face). Look for another style.

  • molly February 10, 2016 at 4:23 am

    Here we go again with this woman wrapper who cannot write on his own gender. Only ever writes on women. You must be obsessed with us. Geez.

  • Olly February 10, 2016 at 6:32 am

    In what part of the article did he lie? Yes his opinion but all them feminist in nigeria particularly don’t even know what the fight is about.
    I have a friend who would claim feminist till jesus comes.the tiniest of hiccups and she goes to a man to ease her out of it. We like men to dominate period. Enough of lying to ourselves.

  • Me February 10, 2016 at 9:20 am

    such a dumb article..I only pity those who pay attention to your crap

  • DAME February 10, 2016 at 10:37 am

    I am not a prude however it doesn’t have to begin and end with sex. There’s really more to life

  • niyoola February 10, 2016 at 10:48 am

    HIAN!!!!!!
    What kind of ill-researched article is this?
    I don’t like rough sex
    I don’t like being spanked in bed
    I orgasm when I make love, not some wham-bam ……. lets do this quickly roughness
    I don’t want to be dominated in bed. I have sex and go with the flow. If i feel like being on top, I stay on top (you would obviously need the woman you are with to take permission from you to do this????) If he wants to be ontop, no problem.

    I don’t even get how this post made the cut. It’s ridiculous.

    Mr William, please speak about the kind of sex you and your woman like.

  • hezekina pollutina February 10, 2016 at 10:56 am

    some interesting points william.

    • hezekina pollutina February 10, 2016 at 12:13 pm

      main sex organ for a lady is the mind….a few men understand this…everything else is garnish…

  • hezekina pollutina February 10, 2016 at 10:59 am

    interesting…

  • niyoola February 10, 2016 at 11:08 am

    Let me respond to your comment above.

    1) Do women generally prefer to dominante or to be dominated in bed?
    I do not like to be dominated. I like to have sensual and romantic sex. Once in a while, I may want it quick and fast (not rough) – This is usually before my period when androgens have taken over. I don’t know know about other ‘general’ women

    2) Are powerful men genreally more attractive to women than less powerful men?
    Who is a powerful man?
    I do not like guys with muscles
    I like confident men, who exude such in subtly (i don’t like an arrogant or know-it-all man)
    I like reserved men, calm behaviour (not a push-over. Firm and assertive when necessary, not someone who stomps around rattling the china)

    3) Where did I say women like being slapped? I didn’t even use the word ‘slap’, I said spank in reference to female sexual behaviour.
    I don’t like being spanked during sex. (Pls don’t go and spank every random lady you are shagging. She may not like it, but doesn’t want to spoil the flow of the moment by giving you evil eye.)

    4) Is it so far-fetched that sexist behaviour is an over-compensation for the pressure on men to be dominating?
    Men dominate because they are told to dominate. We need to revise how we bring-up our kids. Girls should sit pretty, Guys should roar round the house.
    Guys are encouraged from a young age to be rough. That smile daddy gives you when he is boasting to his friends that you totalled your toy car after just 2 days is an unwritten approval to a young boy to carry on.

    5) What part of this article puts men on a pedestal?

    6) What part of this article has been blatantly factually inaccurate? Er …. refer to comments above

    7) And for every lady reading this…are you more likely to be attracted to a man you consider weaker than yourself in whatever way you grade strength and weakness?

    My partner and I compliment each other. Strength & Weakness ……. both are present in each person. He doesn’t see me as weak, and I don’t see him as weak. I also have never looked at him as my ‘strong’ boo. Nah

    • Big Tee February 10, 2016 at 12:49 pm

      I think question 2 was referring to powerful men in terms of status….that is why the writer referred to Genevieve as the powerful person when he compared himself to her….. at least that was the thought that came to my mind when I read that statement.

      • niyoola February 10, 2016 at 1:16 pm

        I also included attitude wrt to power in the next line. If you are a ‘powerful person’ with the wrong attitude/character, then you are not it.
        (i had to include the muscular part incase he was referring to strength, as per domineering men).

    • Huh February 13, 2016 at 12:39 am

      Well you raised good points but also made a general and untrue example of how boys and girls are raised. My parents didn’t encourage us boys to be rough. See we are playing to the same stereotype you are trying to call out.

  • LaLa February 10, 2016 at 11:15 am

    This is a very dangerous article:

    The generalisations are overwhelming.

    1)Take it from me guys, no woman is going to orgasm from a gentle f*ck.
    2)Psychologically, a woman is turned on by the domination of a man in bed
    3)women want their hair pulled, ass spanked…

    Dude, even you have to see the danger in these generalisations. I’ve always thought it interesting when men speak on the psychological make up of women, what they want, how they want it , why they reason the way they do, etc but what i’ve also realised is that its always said in defence of some form sexism or misogynistic thoughts or behaviour (on the man’s part).

    In this article, you have tagged all women as these people that all want to be dominated and are attracted to power,”I mean by any yardstick she measures strength” but you go right on ahead to define what this woman MUST see as strong or powerful. According to you its either in his wallet, or his rough dominant dickin. So the problem isn’t that women don’t like being with powerful men but really in what you have assumed and defined power to mean to the woman.

    “For men, this means there is always the PRESSURE to dominate”: according to you now this is because the woman wants it? Thus the birth of oppression is really because men are insecure and are trying to meet up to the demands of these women that are attracted to power (money and rough dickin according to you)

    This is what i’ll leave you with, every time you a black Nigerian straight man talks about the woman’s mind or her thinking and psychological make up, imagine a caucasian man or woman commenting on yours, Why you are the way you are or think the way you do (and f course they are generalising like you are so not just talking about you but about everyone like you) whatever you think of that person as far as race and race relations go is exactly what you are in relation to sex and gender relations.

    ps: there is no difference between you and social psychologist Dr Cupcake btw. Just saying

    Oh and i’m a guy

  • niyoola February 10, 2016 at 11:16 am

    BN
    Whats this posting comments too fast thingy? I tried to post MY FIRST COMMENT ON BELLANAIJA TODAY and i’m getting a notification that i’m posting comments too fast?
    took me 3 tries to post my 1st comment and 7 tries to post my 2nd comment.

    Biko, aren’t we about having conversations? why are you trying to prevent us from expressing our views.

    • William Moore February 10, 2016 at 11:52 am

      landofangels.de/py1/sadalla-etal-1987.pdf hope this gives you some perspective.

      Madam, no one is saying every single woman likes to be dominated or spanked or whatever, but if we are to go on research for the general trend, then be my guest and use Google. This is a BellaNajia article, not a school paper. And why is everyone hooked on the sex part of this matter? Na wa oh..It’s just a vehicle to pass a message. And I’m actually single, so no, my right-hand doesn’t like to be choked or called a slut…

      I do wonder though, for all this kick-back against the idea of domination, how did 50 Shades of Grey manage to be such a hit? I mean, that dude was all shades of controlling and misogynistic, but yet, so many women loved him. Look at Chris Brown, even after that guy smacked the beloved Rhianna, women were on the Twitter saying he could smack them too.

      Interesting debate all round sha. We have agreed, we have disagreed, and we have agreed to disagree.

      • niyoola February 10, 2016 at 1:15 pm

        Well, i never read or watched 50 shades of grey.

        Of course, you’ll find papers to justify youropinion

      • Angry people everywhere February 10, 2016 at 3:09 pm

        Niyola, it is an opinion. So just like you have expressed yours (Although rather distastefully) he also has expressed his. You didn’t watch 50 shades, but others watched and even enjoyed. so please rest already.

      • Mz_Daniels February 10, 2016 at 10:20 pm

        There are lots of insecure human beings with issues.

        Can we just stop all these arguments and just be your best self and find people who’s cray cray matches yours

      • Huh February 13, 2016 at 12:46 am

        Bro you should know that people like fantasy but will settle for steady and normal every other day. Doctor Grey is just a once in a while escape from the normal.

  • Taiwo February 10, 2016 at 11:56 am

    My people, there’s textbook definition of a movement, there’s individual understanding of that textbook definition and then, there’s reality.

    Here’s the reality. Many women are out there shouting feminist, they are spending less time being one especially here in Nigeria. Also please note that there are different feminist movements and all of them do not agree on many issues even though they are issues on feminism. So one feminist could be here arguing with another feminist on feminism for eternity. Una still wan argue?

    Please also note that women are not the only people who are feminists. There are men who are. One of them is the Nigerian playwright, Femi Osofisan and that’s just one of many in these parts. Forget U.S, France and whatever country comes to mind when you’re thinking feminism and begin to ask yourself how many doctrines of the feminist movement are you actually practicing (if you’re a feminist), what particular feminist movement are you rooting for and why?

    Also we need to understand there’s a big difference between Gender equality and Feminism. Feminism is about women having the right to make choices for themselves without being discriminated upon or silenced because they are female (basically) and Gender is about the social construct of what it means to be male or female. I see many arguments on Bella are more around Gender than feminism, yet they call themselves feminists. Really feminism is actually deeper than online debates and fancy (or ugly) name calling. It’s psychological (mostly), physical, and linguistic as well.

    For example, take the English language. I like to think English is a masculine language. Think of generic words or names in English and they mostly refer to the male gender. “Man” as a word is generic for male and female and is used to address both gender in certain instances when there is need for generalization. As a feminist, in instances like that, do you change it to “woman” perhaps? Okay maybe I’m a little extreme in my example.

    Let’s come to Nigeria. the first examples of Feminism are Benin women. Does anyone know how firmly those women run their homes? The children respect and revere their “Iye” more than they do their fathers (a former classmate told me this. She has a Benin paternal grandmother whom she grew up with and my few interactions with Benin people over the years have tilted me towards this thinking as well). Yet these women do not go about town shouting Feminism. Are there mentions of them in the western textbooks on feminism? None that I know of.

    So kindly do me a favour and answer this. What are you fighting for; Gender Equality or Feminism? Then we can really start arguing constructively.

    Btw, I’m female. And when I have kids, what my daughters can do, my sons will do. And vice versa

  • Big Tee February 10, 2016 at 12:06 pm

    I’m afraid most people are missing the social ills highlighted in the article; the majority seems to be attacking the writer who might just be exercising his intellectual versatility to write about issues from different perspectives and contexts, he might just be playing the Devil’s advocate, while not necessarily expressing his own stance. Dear W.I.M, I am sure that for every attack you receive, 3 to 5 more people actually reflected on the points raised… as I see it, its a win-win for you, you’ll inspire people to think and the number of those who’d love to hate you will also increase….. please keep them coming.

  • Lol February 10, 2016 at 1:07 pm

    Exactly. When black women join the feminist fight like it was created for them.

    Jumping on bandwagons that Dont belong to them.
    Feminism in America is a joke now. Just an excuse to be naked and yell.

    On this part of the world we have real issues. There they just want to make the news. I go to school with some of them and its sad.

  • niyoola February 10, 2016 at 1:09 pm

    I also included attitude wrt to power in the next line. If you are a ‘powerful person’ with the wrong attitude/character, then you are not it.
    (i had to include the muscular part incase he was referring to strength, as per domineering men).

  • Why are we angry please? February 10, 2016 at 1:13 pm

    I just read the article and like i do to a lot of articles posted on BN, I just laughed. While i may not agree with some of the points raised, I am totally bewildered by the comments here. Seriously, why are we angry? The anger is just too unnecessary. Do y’all have something personal against William? Because i just don’t understand the venom being spilled, even to his character and personal life. Hian!!! Please what did he say?
    The long and short of what i got is that women are more attracted to powerful men, in almost all aspects of life. is that a lie? Even CB said in a post a while back that she had a challenge with a guy she might like because he is not on the same or a even higher intellectual pedigree as her. Did the men come out to kill her?
    Abeg William, I trust that you will continue to give us your thoughts on these and other issues and will not be fazed by all these angry people on here. Feel free to disagree but please be done with the anger. Haba!

  • Fade To Black February 10, 2016 at 3:56 pm

    @William, I would like to see you cross swords with a male commenter using the same zeal you use to attack the female ones. I remember the venom you spit at some poor lady in your first article who dared to disagree with you. Back to the real world where there are men who do not feel the need to condone rape or violence against women

  • aicha February 10, 2016 at 4:28 pm

    First of all your conceptualization of social construct is patently false. A social construct isn’t based on natural instinct; it’s the result of an ideology. Women being attracted to powerful men is the social construct in this case because it’s not based on instinct but on socialization. Just a quick google search and you can find many matriarchal societies where women rule and hold the position of dominance. My advise to you is that you need to read more about feminism/sociology if you want to be taken seriously.

  • larz February 10, 2016 at 4:29 pm

    A father and son have a car accident and are both badly hurt. They are both taken to separate hospitals. They flew in one of the best surgeon to operate on the boy. When the boy is taken in for an operation, the surgeon (doctor) says “I can’t do the surgery because this is my son.

    When most people read this story (men and women), their first thought was “how is this possible” and re-read the story”. The surgeon in the story is the boy’s mother. Whilst there are a few hard core sexists (or other forms of discrimination/ bias), unconscious bias is the most popular form of discrimination. There was research that shows that a panel/ voters (male and female alike) are likely to choose a male person into a position of authority where the two final candidates are similarly qualified. This means for a woman to have a real shot at being appointed/ elected into roles like (CEO/ presidency or other public offices/ Supreme Court Judge/ Chief Medical Officer etc.), she need to be considerably better than her male opponent. If she is a unmarried, she will need to double her efforts. By the way, this is for an average / reasonable “non-racist” panel; the odds are even worst with a racist panel.

    What true feminists want is for the playing field to be evened out a little. For people to think a little differently; to begin to reset that “unconscious bias” button in our brain.

  • Tosin February 10, 2016 at 8:07 pm

    interesting.
    i’m not sure i find gender a useful construct for myself. i’m basically a dude. it’s kinda confusing. lol, i’m a gay guy.
    so do i want to be dominated socially/sexually, not really, but i do want for friends and companions somebody / people who are sufficiently complex and interesting, and that includes not being a pushover and that includes not being an asshole.
    but i’ll take the pushover over the asshole 99% of the time.
    i don’t like assholes.
    🙂
    i understand too that socially, around here, a guy is expected to be dominant – more money , more height, more years , more physical strength, more prestige , more gra-gra , etc. and around here too, a woman should not be sooo “big”, it’s unfeminine, she should whip out her acting skills if need be, so that she can be “under” the man or under men in general. o well, that’s rubbish. glad i can be myself, not have to squeeze into this stereotypical female role.
    i hope more people get to live the way they want to. gender stereotypes that drive men to be more “manly” than they want to be, or women to be more “womanly” … who needs them today?

    how is this article about feminism again? what is feminism ma sef?

  • Candace February 11, 2016 at 3:13 am

    Brilliant write up Willy

  • aisha February 11, 2016 at 10:48 am

    Equality or nah, I don’t think a woman shouldn’t be treated any less cos shes a woman, or she should be trampled upon, i think a woman should be given the respect she deserves and she also has rights to be protected… I don’t see why people go all the way to blur the differences between a man & a woman hence the so called “feminism” ? we blacks should stop emulating the whites in everything they do, we should be “real” for once…there’s no way we’d ever be “equal” with men but we should be treated fairly cos God knows why He created us to be different.

  • ElessarisElendil February 11, 2016 at 10:23 pm

    William Please keep the articles coming some coddled children need to have intellectual challenges.

    I’m voting against censorship ohh BellaNaija.

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