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Uru Eke: Open Your Mind to Online Dating

Online dating isn’t supposed to replace face-to-face human interaction. It’s more of a means of connecting you to other compatible singles that you might want to meet in person. I think dating online should be called online meeting, because the dating is supposed to happen in real life, not virtually

Uru Eke

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The world is turning digital and so has the dating game. A lot more people have explored the option of dating online because, to be honest, except you’re very active socially, the chances of meeting ‘the one’ on your daily grind are limiting.

There used to be a stigma surrounding online dating, and I think part of it was residual, as judgement was passed down from our parents. Our parents didn’t grow up with the internet, so they view it with a certain distance. But with the advent of the technology, the internet and social media, our world has been cracked wide open.

You get to watch people livestream everything about themselves, post pictures of their day-to-day activities, ups, downs and daily grind. Send a message to a stranger via their social network handle and if you’re lucky, you get a response. Technology has made it somewhat easier to date and connect with people all around the globe. Imagine If your soulmate lived in China and you live all the way in Bulgaria, at least with various apps you can watch and communicate with them in real time.

Almost every facet of our lives is online now: buying clothes, watching TV, ordering food, filing taxes, registering to vote, getting a job, streaming movies, and so on. Online dating isn’t supposed to replace face-to-face human interaction. It’s more of a means of connecting you to other compatible singles that you might want to meet in person. I think dating online should be called online meeting, because the dating is supposed to happen in real life, not virtually. And the people you find on these sites vary so much, you really can’t go wrong.

There was a dating show I used to watch called Millionaire Matchmaker, where millionaires paid premium to this lady called Patty to find them a match. During the opening montage she would say, “Everybody wants love, but not everyone finds it.” She has positioned herself as a connector and boasts of a very high success rate, but you would have to pay heavy for her service. For those of us who can’t afford an expensive matchmaker, the internet is free.

Love is a fundamental human need. Most people meet their significant others through their social circles or work/school functions. However, these pools can be relatively shallow. In the search for a potential date, more and more people are switching to less traditional methods. A few celebrities couples we know have confessed to have connected this way, and are in loving meaningful relationships/marriages today.

Please, if you are going to date online, tread with caution, as there are a lot of weirdos prowling the cyberspace. A few years ago a story made the headlines about a girl called Cynthia Osokogu, daughter to a military officer, who was murdered by a man she met on Facebook. So it is absolutely important to be careful and observant when talking to anyone online. Put your FBI cap on, do some background checks if you must. Don’t give away to much information about yourself. For years there have been stories of internet love scams, and as popular as these stories are, more and more people keep falling prey.

Dating online also allows people exaggerate their profile by fabricating their lives to seem more attractive. So it’s important to be discerning. Take your time, ask questions – lots of questions. Ask for pictures, make video calls, and if they refuse to a video call – red flags should start to go up.

Not to discourage you, but if you are going to try dating online, research your options. Forbes reports that there are about 8,000 dating sites in the world, so ask for recommendations from friends, family, etc. Check out the popular ones, sites that have conducted interviews and have media coverage. In essence, open your mind to other forms of connecting with people and see searching online as a possibility.

3 Comments

  1. chu-chu

    April 5, 2019 at 9:28 am

    Do we have any reasonable dating sites in Nigeria? Unfortunately, Tinder is not one of them.

    • Andallen

      April 5, 2019 at 1:36 pm

      @ chu chu we do there is surulere love by our own Dr Craig.

      1
    • Mp

      April 5, 2019 at 5:14 pm

      Yes we do… met my boyfriend on surulere sometime last year… He is an amazing dude! Didn’t believe in meeting a partner online until I gave surulere a try. We are over a year together, very happy and walking down the aisle soon. Big ups to Dr. Craig for creating surulerelove

      2

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