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What’s the Secret for a Successful Relationship? Watch for Good Advice

BellaNaija.com

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Most people in a relationship want good advice on how to make it work. And barely a week ago, a TV personality gave an awesome advice.

As a guest on a new show – “The Daily Help Line“, Brandy Norwood asked the hosts for their advice on having a successful relationship.

One of the co-hosts Spirit said this;

“If there was something that we could bottle, honestly, everybody wants to know the secret. And this is the hard part. You’re not really going to like the answer because I think communication every day is the key. And I honestly think that most people are not willing to do what it takes to make a marriage work, much less a relationship. Most of us, we have to ask the question: Why should I share my passwords with my partner? Why do I have to tell them where I am?

I really think with all sincerity, I really think that relationships are hard, and people don’t want to work hard. You have to tell your partner, ‘If we’re going to do this, I mean literally do this, it needs to be ’til death do us part, not ’til divorce do us part.’ So if divorce is never an option, and your personal happiness always has to be an option, then what you’ll say is ‘Hey listen, we have a problem and I refuse to be unhappy so we need to figure this out. We need to get to resolution. When you take it off the table, then you have the opportunity for resolution, you have the opportunity to forgive, and you have the opportunity for forever. Forgive. You can’t hold on to stuff.”

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What’s your take BellaNaijarians?
Photo Credit: Dreamstime.com/Hongqi Zhang (aka Michael Zhang)

29 Comments

  1. roots

    August 7, 2014 at 4:00 am

    yass!

  2. Mr. George

    August 7, 2014 at 4:06 am

    I like Americans……always outspoken and honest.

  3. Lindsey

    August 7, 2014 at 4:43 am

    Yep …people are so lazy to put in the work that is required for successful marriages. I call it the punkass strategy, whereby you walk away when you aren’t having your way or when you get called out on your crap by your partner. Any issues they just can’t deal. Next thing The guy is already dating someone else, and the chic is already on Instagram shopping for another pick me up. I feel couples should have and agree on their deal breakers . You cheat, I leave your ass. everything else we can resolve. You beat me, I f- you up and then i leave your ass…everything else in between we can work out. I feel if people communicate clear deal breakers, realistic ones too…then it’s clear that whoever goes around breaking deals is actually ready for the relationship or marriage to be over. You can’t go into a relationship not expecting to compromise though. That loving guy that is so caring will piss you off on some days and that girl whose ogbono makes you bless the day you married her will insult you and for a minute, you might wonder if the Ogbono is worth the insult…:).

    Last but not least, it takes two to make anything work. It cannot be one sided. One person should not be tasked with making the marriage work cos then that becomes a form of abuse. The guy should be trying not to lose his woman and the girl should be trying not to lose her man. They should not want to lose each other. My uncle’s wife of 15yrsis a real trouble maker…the woman can start shit die…but my uncle will tell you, “I love my wife and her wahala, this house is dry and boring without her” and then on some major wahala days, my uncle will threaten to move out cos he doesn’t want jadesola’s wahala to kill him. They manage their issues in a way that keeps them in love

    • tunmi

      August 7, 2014 at 9:10 pm

      I absolutely agree

  4. RS

    August 7, 2014 at 8:01 am

    Amen!!!

  5. Hanyta Baker

    August 7, 2014 at 8:16 am

    I totally Agree…… a 100% True.. Communication is d Number 1 key.. And then others Come..

  6. likas papaya

    August 7, 2014 at 8:17 am

    Ladies, love is hard. So there’s 2 options;
    1. Suffer & compromise & worry & doubt & get wrinkles tryna fix a relationship
    OR
    2. Save urself the stress, get a rabbit. 😉

    • Thatgidigirl

      August 7, 2014 at 12:32 pm

      Rabbits don’t cuddle unfortunately….but hey, they’re reliable “O” givers and don’t break your heart either.

    • pretty

      August 8, 2014 at 9:47 am

      so are you saying i should date a rabbit

  7. Jhennique

    August 7, 2014 at 9:20 am

    TRUE TALK!!!!

  8. ice

    August 7, 2014 at 9:20 am

    Nice response

  9. misspynk

    August 7, 2014 at 9:31 am

    The truth has been stated. Good relationships dont just happen, it takes a lot of conscious and sometimes even calculated effort on the part of all involved.

  10. Tobi

    August 7, 2014 at 9:36 am

    I want the rocky and Adrain type of relationship

    • Onyx

      August 7, 2014 at 11:06 am

      careful what you wish for….

  11. tolu

    August 7, 2014 at 9:39 am

    hmmm…

  12. Flames

    August 7, 2014 at 10:00 am

    Definitely, so so ryt

  13. sum1special

    August 7, 2014 at 10:11 am

    Relationship is about work,work and more work. You cant afford to be lazy about it, if not it will crumbl.e

  14. efe

    August 7, 2014 at 10:48 am

    It requires HARD work and consistently working at it. How many people are READY?

  15. Omo1

    August 7, 2014 at 10:51 am

    Relationships? You definitely have to put in loads and tons of WORK, with conscious efforts too..It is always good to study your partner and your relationship to know what works. This is VERY important. Not wise to think because this worked for A, it should work for B

  16. No name

    August 7, 2014 at 11:13 am

    communication, communication , communication… this cannot be over emphasized… .. talk about the mundane and the not so mundane, the interesting and the not so interesting, the good and the bad, the ups and the downs.. talk,talk and talk to each other… Not just talking the other person’s ear off, but actually having a conversation.. as often as possible.. morning, afternoon, night.
    learn to talk about the not so serious stuff and when the time comes to discuss the serious issues, communication wont be so hard because both parties are comfortable talking to each other. Talk about any and everything,

    Laughter is very important… I believe couples should laugh with each other and laugh at each other.. Crack jokes, make fun of stuff just to make the other person laugh.. make light of things.. light conversations.

    Its always been said , ” be best friends with your partner/spouse”…. How do best friends relate? they talk to each other all the time,gist about everything … In d middle of a work day, take out a few mins to chat him/her up… gist about stuff that happened at the office, stuff that happened on d way to work,, ask him/her how the day’s going… something funny happened at work? share the joke with your partner… Laugh…

    Find ways to make him/her laugh as often as you can.. this is oh so important

    Of course its a 2 way street. with both parties having to listen as well talk in almost equal measure.. Blessed is that relationship that has this sort of dynamic…

  17. Nice

    August 7, 2014 at 11:31 am

    Y’all complaining bout your husbands/ bfs and dumping them for the slightest things, take note!

    Relationship/Marriage is not chicken and chips, requires communication, maturity, hard work, dedication and commitment from both parties.

    Our mothers wouldn’t be in their homes today if they had taken off cos of the slightest issues. Ask mum what she has gone through before having a sweet and peaceful marriage now!

    Indomie generation!

  18. aisha

    August 7, 2014 at 12:54 pm

    Good word

  19. happychick

    August 7, 2014 at 2:33 pm

    lmao @indomie generation!

  20. Pauline

    August 7, 2014 at 2:49 pm

    *sighs* bless y’all. Esp @no name

  21. Mary

    August 7, 2014 at 4:09 pm

    Yeah communication must be true and regularly

  22. brules

    August 7, 2014 at 7:46 pm

    lols @ indomie generation,thats what we truly are,but the fact remains that no one should stay in an abusive relationship,not for anything.Every other thing can be talked out,but abuse in any form??? Borrow Usain Bolt’s leg and run run run

  23. Ngo

    August 7, 2014 at 10:04 pm

    I don’t believe in the sharing of passwords

  24. pretty

    August 8, 2014 at 9:21 am

    Me too. why must he know my password?

  25. ayeeshamoh.

    August 9, 2014 at 9:22 am

    d major issue in any marriage comes 4rm d husband, ‘coz ey never share any of ere secrect wit ere wives & ey giv more priority 2 ere datin gurls on chat than ere wives @ hom

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